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How to Approach a Woman Sitting at a Table in a Restaurant? Stand, Squat or Sit?

In the review of body language project, Lucio recommends not to tower but to squat beside the girl:


Christopher Philip says that towering is the wrong way to dominate, and it means you keep standing while she’s sitting and slightly crouch down a little bit towards her.

Height advantage can be used while standing if you’re taller, but should never be exploited if she’s sitting and you approach while standing. That’s called “towering” and feels overpowering.

Never approach a girl sitting while you’re standing.

Your initial goal is never to dominate or intimidate a woman upon approaching her, your goal is to turn the natural fear response most women can have to a man’s approach into excitement.
Christopher Philip says that trying to dominate is also an indicator of disinterest.


Going nearby and squatting lowers your body height compared to hers.

Christopher Philip says that squatting shows courtesy and is not necessarily less dominant.

And I couldn’t agree more.
When you approach her while she’s sitting it shows a lot of cojones from your side, so showing courtesy on top of cojones will skyrocket your value to her eyes.

If you're at a restaurant and there're no empty chairs nearby, wouldn't it be inconvenient to find some way to sit beside her?
If I squat, wouldn't one end up lower in height than her?
Squatting seems to be a generally uncomfortable position to talk to someone too.

I am unsure whether I towered in a bad way when approaching a girl sitting in a restaurant.
This was quite long ago so I may misremember some details.
All the seats were taken around her by her friends, so I wasn't sure how to handle the height issue.
Maybe there's a good distance to stand where you're not too near and not too far.

It was at like 3am in the night where people were having late supper.
Strangely her friends didn't say much during our interaction.
(No male friends so I believe that made it easier.)
Maybe they were tired after a long night.
To be honest, I was also very tired so I went for it without thinking much.

Lucio recommends a maximum of 7 minutes.
We talked for 10 minutes before she initiated the exchange of contacts: "let's keep in touch".
Although I led the number exchange afterwards.
So I believe it may have been too long in the relatively uncomfortable standing-sitting positions.
And I may have lost some leadership points in not initiating the contact exchange.

Grabbing a chair upon receiving an initial, favourable response could be another option.

Let me grab a chair to talk for a few minutes.
It will save our necks.

So stand, squat or sit?
Feel free to share your thoughts.
It will help me a lot too.

Great thread. I m interested too.

I can't help much never mastered cafe restaurant game.  My hunting grounds for cold approach was my local Sunday market.

My mate who was just born with steel cojones ran this routine.  He d slide into a chair next to a girl sitting on her own and say sorry I m late.  That was pre me too and I m sure I d get slapped if I tried.

I used to do the waitress drop.  Chat to her a bit.  Say hey think you dropped this.  Hand her a bit of folded paper with your deets.  Smile or give her an intense look, whatever s your style, and  leave.   Guys say  that's too pvssy move but I got about a 10% strike rate and I didn't have to listen to the why your such a loser speech from some bit of fluff

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Matthew Whitewood