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"It's Just You" Technique to Disagree or Distance from Someone's Opinion

Also a good technique here was one that we have yet to name and describe.

I'd call it "it's just you" for now.

And it works like this:

Windell: Look, it was not inspiring to me either.
A bunch of old white people looking lost is not inspiring.
Craig: Oh, you didn't find it good?

It's a small detail, but when you say "you didn't", you are implying that it's him, his opinion.
And he might not be an authority.

Now the frame is not anymore "it wasn't cool" VS "it was cool", but it's "YOU didn't find it cool", and that moves to the level of a personal opinion.
And you can later counter it with "well, it made me and a bunch of other people laugh, but I still appreciate your opinion on this".

Very interesting technique!
I have seen this and probably used this myself unknowingly.

Lucio explains that it isolates the comment as an opinion rather than a consensus by the majority or an authority's advice.
I remember that there was a thread about higher authority power moves!
I cannot find this at the moment.
This discussion will fit in nicely with that thread.

Further Breakdown By Lucio

A further breakdown of how the conversation can play out if you use this technique:

Also, notice this technique is much subtler.

It doesn't break the flow like frame imposing, or even surfacing.
It just subtly disempowers their frames. Some people won't even realize what happened, and most of those who do won't have the quick-wit to fix it on the fly.

If they found out, they'd reply like this:

Him: Well, it isn't just me, lots of people think that way

Or:

Him: Yeah, but it isn't just me, it just was not cool

But you're still better off, since now your moves are easy, with:

You: WHO thinks that way?

And:

You: Well, a lot of people think it was cool

And with the last one, at worst, you end with a draw (your camp, VS my camp).

Or if he wanted to power move:

You: Well, a lot of non-Christians thought it was cool

Now he frames his view as puritanical, and him as a religious zealot.

Analysis

Let me try to find that thread so we don't have to repeat the analysis again.
The gist of this is when someone makes a power opinion that suggests generality, breaking the connection with authority and a majority/societal consensus would work to isolate the comment down to the person.
This weakens the power of the opinion.

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Lucio Buffalmanoselffriend

Yes, this is similar to the "who said it" technique against microaggressions:

#1.2. “Who Said It”?

A common technique to go under cover is to say that “someone else said this”.

At that point, the aggressor can say anything and then pretend it wasn’t him who said it.

There are several ways to deal with this, and one of them is to question “who are these other people”.

But, that's in the case of refusing the other side's attempt at power borrowing (borrowing the power to stand up to someone from another party by communicating, "It's the other party who's making these aggressive comments, I'm just the messenger.")

This situation is a little different though in that it's actually a case of refusing the other side's attempt at frame charging:

Lucio: "Your typical smart alec will casually turbocharge his frame with sentences like 'the consensus is…', 'research proves', etc. etc. To handle that frame effectively, before even replying, you need to reframe their original frame as NOT the ultimate scientific fact. For example, you could say it’s just an opinion of theirs, and not science."

So, we could say that a way of dealing with frame charging (which should probably be in the dictionary too) is "frame isolating". Communicating: "It's only you who thinks that."

Thanks Ali, I see what you mean.

I think Windell here was quite subtle on this power move.
His first sentence was framed as an opinion.
Then, he goes general on the second sentence, implying most people would find whatever Craig did uninspiring.

Windell: Look, it was not inspiring to me either.
A bunch of old white people looking lost is not inspiring.

Isn't the smart-alec remarks a form of power borrowing?
The smart-alec tries to borrow power from scientific sources whether credible or not.

If I can find the thread on countering power moves by borrowing power from higher authority, it would be a great addition to this thread.

Quote from Matthew Whitewood on March 3, 2021, 6:47 pm

Isn't the smart-alec remarks a form of power borrowing?

I like this thread, so don't want to send it off the wrong path.

Did you find that thread you were referring to (edit: just to be sure this doesn't end up sounding like tasking, you don't have to find it, I can also do it, I asked since you had mentioned it :))?
I'd gladly take a look at it before we can flesh out this technique as a new concept / definition.

Also, if you guys can think of better names for this technique, let me know.

OFF TOPIC

It can be, yes, but doesn't have to.

The smart-alec is also about the attitude of "I know better / you know shit".

I think the smart alec might deserve its own article, as the best smart alecs can achieve a lot of success while adding relatively little value.

Freud was an example of smart alec.
Try to Google his pictures and his expressions scream "I know all, I'm the authority". And with that attitude, he managed to peddle his own speculations -some of them genius, many of them BS- as if they were God's laws.

OFF TOPIC

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selffriend
Have you read the forum guidelines for effective communication already?
Quote from Lucio Buffalmano on March 4, 2021, 5:28 pm

Did you find that thread you were referring to (edit: just to be sure this doesn't end up sounding like tasking, you don't have to find it, I can also do it, I asked since you had mentioned it :))?
I'd gladly take a look at it before we can flesh out this technique as a new concept / definition.

Also, if you guys can think of better names for this technique, let me know.

I cannot seem to find the thread.
I tried searching

  • Higher Authority
  • Donald Trump
  • Authority
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selffriend

I found the thread!
Dominating By Using the Group

Thanks to John for starting this thread previously.
I found it by searching Donald Trump.
I missed this the first time.

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Lucio Buffalmanoselffriend

Boom!

Thank you Matthew!

I'll go through it, and I guess we're ready for defining and officializing the new concept, then (think it deserves a note on PU as well, these two interrelated concepts of "power borrowing from the group", VS "isolation" are crucial for frame control as well as for influencing and winning debates.

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Matthew Whitewoodselffriend
Have you read the forum guidelines for effective communication already?