Addition in the Frame control samples
Hey Lucio,
I appreciate the valuable work that you have done in the power moves university. Recently I watched the movie The imitation game and from the 17:00 minute till 18:50 there is an extreme example of frame control. If you want to give it a look, I think it would be a nice addition.
Have a nice evening man!
Thank you nikoskol!
If it's a famous scene and you have a link to it on YouTube, it will be even easier for me -or anyone who's interested- to check it out.
Cheers!
Yeah sure!
Here is the link: https://youtu.be/U_xE807vc6g
It starts at 17:05 and ends at 18:40.
Cheers!
Thank you, Nikoskol.
And what do you think of that?
Mmm let's see. It seems like we have a lot here.
The guy who begins the scene (let's call him B) says to Alan
" Boys we are going to get some lunch."
So here B tries to take one up and behave like a leader.
So Alan does a good job to ignore his frame by not answering.
B continues to tell Alan that they will go for lunch and Alan continues ignoring his frame.
B says that it starts to get a little bit repetitive and Alan asks " What is?"
B says that "I have ask you if you want to come to lunch with us"
Alan answers " No you didn't. You said you are going to get some lunch." Here he shows B that high is highly aware of the communication tricks that B is playing with him.
B replies by saying " Have I offended you in some way?" and Alan quickly answers with a question " Why do you think about that?"
(By questioning him he shows one up and he handle this communication. Plus there is strong body language from the beginning and Alan looks far superior than B in the whole scene.)
B prefers to not answer the question ( power move) and he continues by asking Alan if he wants to go for lunch with them.
Alan continues with the power moves and answers "What time is the lunch actually ?"
Another guy let's call him C seems to gets tires from Alan's game and he jumps in the dialogue and says " Alan is obligated sandwich."
Alan answers " I don't like sandwich. "
This is an extreme power moves it gives signs of a high in power low in warmth who don't really want to cooperate with his team plus he don't want to push him away.
Now there are 30 sec of power moves which I don't really think is that important to analyze but is good for a look.
Now another guy let's call him D says " Who is angry? Lets go!" Now everybody turned their back in Alan and started walking outside. So Alan decides to play his last one up power move by saying " I am hungry." ( he answered 5 sec late with no rush also another power move.)
C asks " What?!"
Alan says " D asked who is hungry? Can I have some soup, please?"
This guy is very crazy and really shows very dominant and extremely low in warmth by doing this things but he clearly proves that he is not someone with whom they can play games or give him tasks.
Lucio it would be nice to hear also you analysis if you want to.
Saw the scene, Thanks for sharing!
at 18:03,
Guy 1: to pull off that kinda routine one needs to be a Genius, yet we are making progress here.(indicating guy 1 is progressig and guy 2 is not)
Guy 2: you are?
Even though confrontational, I think Guy 2 is giving into guy 1's frame, I think it would have been better to say.
- what's the definition of progress for you?
- progressing according to what standard?
Although both would not be giving into the frame, they are still confrontational.
How could guy 2, respond with a collaborative frame?
Let's see if there is someone who wants to contribute.
Focus on the general feel of that scene, and the consequences.
How is the group going to feel about Alan after that?
What are they going to say about Alan as they go to lunch together?
Are they going to say good things about him, respect him more?
And once they're back, how are the work dynamics going to change?
Are they going to help him, collaborate with him, support him... ?
Or ar they going to antagonize him?
These are the crucial questions here.
A "frame battle" is only a small snapshot in time.
Far more relevant for your social and life success is how that small interaction is going to change the whole power dynamics and the future interactions.