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Defending friends and colleagues without rescuing

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 turn it into a micro-lesson (little pun there) for Power University.

Hahaha! Definitely!

I was in such a similar situation. There was this office joker who had been pulling me quite some time. Then once I lost my cool and we had a showdown. I had since stopped talking to him and this went on for months until we made peace. Until then most office guys thought I was the patsy and kept entertaining him till he came for them. Reading the article made me realize my mistakes and the importance of setting boundaries.

@Lucio sir, also I did notice that being sarcastic tends to deflect these attacks. I know in one of your other lessons on dealing with aggressors you cautioned against this strategy, what would you say here?

Dan,

  • Showdowns

A showdown is fair game with the very worst individuals who truly don't know how to behave any better.

It should be a last resort, though.

  • Sarcasm

It can work, but I don't recommend it as your go-to solution.

You got PU, right?
When there is a lesson and a free article, always go for the lesson, it's deeper and i explain there why it's not the optimal solution.
But, in short:

You can't fly with the eagles if you scratch with the turkeys

Sarcasm is covert aggression.
Ideally, you want to avoid falling for the same covert-aggressive games. It hinders your development as an assertive, honest-talking straight shooter.

Have you read the forum guidelines for effective communication already?

Lucio, I am in a big mess and I want to lean heavily on your advice. My lawyer has joined hands with the opposite lawyer in my divorce case. To engage another lawyer I need his consent and also need to settle his accounts. In our country lawyer fees are not standard. How do I make sure that I don't pay too much money and yet get that consent. One thing I did is disengage myself from the matter for a few days so that my anger at his  betrayal is under control. He doesn’t suspect that I know about his betrayal. This is a life changing situation,  so depending on your advice Lucio.

Lucio, also I am meeting the lawyer on 23rd India time evening. Any advice before that, will be grateful for it.

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