Former Community – We Moved
🆕 Coached community here, for posts & feedback public community here.
Defense: mocking the defender with funny noises
Hello TPM community,
this is the situation where you say something and the person repeats it with making funny noises. I think the attack relates to "babying".
Context
At work, my colleague said something and I said:
Me (active listening): Aha
Her (in a high-pitch mocking voice): Aaahaa
I did not know how to react really as I was not expecting this.
My proposed solutions
I think the best option is to reframe. Surfacing with low investment is another option. As ignoring here is not the best option. We can only ignore the whole thing and not only the frame I think. I also don't think here frame rejection, philosopher's frame would work as well.
Reframe #1
Me (active listening): Aha
Her (in a high-pitch mocking voice): Aaahaa
Me: are you being a parrot?
Reframe #2
Me (active listening): Aha
Her (in a high-pitch mocking voice): Aaahaa
Me: you're a good singer!
Surfacing with low investment
Me (active listening): Aha
Her (in a high-pitch mocking voice): Aaahaa
Me: why are you making this noise?
Happy to know if you guys have any comments on this.
Interesting. I don't know if it was so in context, but to me this has undertones of potential flirting from her.
I would use the stock response for microaggressions:
You (active listening): Aha
Her (in a high-pitch mocking voice): Aaahaa
You: You're funny. (smile)
Thank you for your answer, Bel.
Hard to tell if she was flirting. It's possible. I had not considered it.
Quote from Bel on September 14, 2023, 10:22 pmI would use the stock response for microaggressions:
You (active listening): Aha
Her (in a high-pitch mocking voice): Aaahaa
You: You're funny. (smile)
This is golden. I think it's high power and spot on. Thanks! Is it in PU? I could not find it.
Cheers!
