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Don't make fun of your superiors in front of your subordinates
Quote from John Freeman on July 29, 2023, 10:09 pmHello,
this is something that I noticed as I'm now between 2 hierarchical layers: one above and one below.
A couple of times I made a joke towards our common superior. I felt that it was out of place:
- It's value-taking: It's social climbing in absentia.
- It does not reflect well on the "executive team" which I'm part of. When I make fun of my superiors I make fun of all the leadership so it's shooting myself in the foot.
- It sets bad precedent: it says it's ok to make fun of superiors.
- It's a bad example: it's petty and reflects bad on my character.
I'm happy to know what you guys think about this.
Hello,
this is something that I noticed as I'm now between 2 hierarchical layers: one above and one below.
A couple of times I made a joke towards our common superior. I felt that it was out of place:
- It's value-taking: It's social climbing in absentia.
- It does not reflect well on the "executive team" which I'm part of. When I make fun of my superiors I make fun of all the leadership so it's shooting myself in the foot.
- It sets bad precedent: it says it's ok to make fun of superiors.
- It's a bad example: it's petty and reflects bad on my character.
I'm happy to know what you guys think about this.
Quote from Lucio Buffalmano on July 29, 2023, 11:16 pmYeah, generally agree with your title, and your analysis is spot on.
Of course, and you know this, there are always exceptions and exceptional situations and circustamces.
but generally speaking, the rule is the one you said.
Also, keep in mind the dynamics of the jokes towards other:
You form an ingroup with the people you joke with, and outgroup with the people who are the butt of your jokes.
That's not good when you make fun of the superiors because you join in with the lower level, and also self-frame as "not executive material" since, if you dislike them, then it's implied you have no interest in joining them.
Sure, the people you make fun of are not there, so one may think there is little loss.
But that's not the case.
First, you still lose some reputation and status with those below.
Plus, when people start seeing you as "one of them and not a future leader", that may spread in endless ways both with you present -ie people treating you like one of them instead of a boss-, and in your absence.
Yeah, generally agree with your title, and your analysis is spot on.
Of course, and you know this, there are always exceptions and exceptional situations and circustamces.
but generally speaking, the rule is the one you said.
Also, keep in mind the dynamics of the jokes towards other:
You form an ingroup with the people you joke with, and outgroup with the people who are the butt of your jokes.
That's not good when you make fun of the superiors because you join in with the lower level, and also self-frame as "not executive material" since, if you dislike them, then it's implied you have no interest in joining them.
Sure, the people you make fun of are not there, so one may think there is little loss.
But that's not the case.
First, you still lose some reputation and status with those below.
Plus, when people start seeing you as "one of them and not a future leader", that may spread in endless ways both with you present -ie people treating you like one of them instead of a boss-, and in your absence.
Quote from B on July 30, 2023, 12:17 amThank you John and Lucio for this thread and posts.It's very helpful.ThisQuote from Lucio Buffalmano on July 29, 2023, 11:16 pmAlso, keep in mind the dynamics of the jokes towards other:
You for an ingroup with the people you joke with, and outgroup with the people who are the butt of your jokes.
is very helpful to know as a general principle for group power dynamics.
Quote from Lucio Buffalmano on July 29, 2023, 11:16 pmAlso, keep in mind the dynamics of the jokes towards other:
You for an ingroup with the people you joke with, and outgroup with the people who are the butt of your jokes.
is very helpful to know as a general principle for group power dynamics.
Quote from Lucio Buffalmano on July 30, 2023, 12:44 amThank you for the note, Bel!
It's always helpful to know what's helpful (and corrected some typos in the initial post in the meanwhile).
I think there is a good similar example that also follows this dynamic in PU's career section.
It's the mid-manager who jokes that he should be careful not to knock-off a plane replica because "he doesn't have as big a salary as you (upper management, implied) guys".
Great move (not).
In under 10 seconds, he made sure to make a lasting impression of not being worthy of ever joining that club, to several high-level managers :).
Thank you for the note, Bel!
It's always helpful to know what's helpful (and corrected some typos in the initial post in the meanwhile).
I think there is a good similar example that also follows this dynamic in PU's career section.
It's the mid-manager who jokes that he should be careful not to knock-off a plane replica because "he doesn't have as big a salary as you (upper management, implied) guys".
Great move (not).
In under 10 seconds, he made sure to make a lasting impression of not being worthy of ever joining that club, to several high-level managers :).
Quote from John Freeman on July 30, 2023, 9:05 pmYou form an ingroup with the people you joke with, and outgroup with the people who are the butt of your jokes.
Thank you Lucio for your answer.
If it's not yet worded like that (or expressed like that) in PU I think it's worthy to add such a sentence. If it is feel free to ignore.
You form an ingroup with the people you joke with, and outgroup with the people who are the butt of your jokes.
Thank you Lucio for your answer.
If it's not yet worded like that (or expressed like that) in PU I think it's worthy to add such a sentence. If it is feel free to ignore.
