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Forcing rapport: parody example of what NOT to do
This is parody.
But sometimes exaggerated parodies are great to understand the dynamics that in real life are similar, but just more subtle (great parody does exactly that: takes real life, and exaggerates it. See the good examples from Family Guy, or "Meet The Parents").
So in real-life people often force rapport by:
- Using "out of place positives/superlatives", trying to force an "this is great", "so exciting", or "we're having such a good time" frame
- White Uplifting Lies, but still obvious lies ("I found the book interesting", in this case)
- Trying too hard, especially with people who aren't doing the same back
There is also something cultural here.
I've noticed that Americans in professional settings tend to do this "so excited about", "this is great" types of "overly positive frames".
I often play the same with Americans who do that just to avoid disempowering them, but it feels fake and surface-layer only rapport.
In my opinion, avoid and go for a more "neutral sincerity" whenever possible.
And especially in friendships/relationships.
Much higher power, much more straight.
