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Hey guys/Over-Analyzing stage
Yo! I'm Marcus, but I go by Mist too. I'm a newbie around here and I want to ask you guys about retention. I'm 18 and I started off using this site to understand ladies more (typical horndog motivations haha.) After delving into Lucio's content more, I got pulled in by the candid and resourceful way self fulfillment, mindsets, and power moves were discussed here. Now that I've consumed a bit of information I consider myself a very fresh member of the over-analyze stage. I fumbled things a whole bunch, but overall my awareness gave me confidence and allowed me to make great strides with my college career and relationships. At this point I'm becoming very prominent with my mentors and peers so it is necessary that I become as socially competent as I am aware. I have only 3 questions.
- What helped you build your social competence?
- What advice would you have for an 18 year old learning all this?
- What advice or warnings do you have for someone in the over-analyzing stage?
( I would say " Thank you in advance" as a sign of goodwill, but I fear that could also send the message that I expect a reply. Oh the woes of over-analyzing. I looked up an alternative though and here it goes in 3 2 1) Thank you for your attention. :)
Ahaha good one, Mist.
I'd personally say to not rush the over-analyzing phase.
I think people might not like this phase because of the negative connotation to "overthinking it".
But people who say "don't overthink it" come in two stripes:
- Those who are already socially smart and power-aware
- Those who are clueless
The first group reached their higher level because of overthinking (or, a few, who were born really talented).
And the second, well... Why would you take any hint from those :). Over-analyzing is already a huge step ahead in comparison.
The over-analyzing phase is all about data points you collect, and all that analysis is about making connections among that data, which is developing your social intelligence, social intuition, and power dynamics awareness.
It's empowering.
As a matter of fact, even once you're past it, it's also helpful to get back to the "analyzing phase" when you're in a totally new situation, or when you're analyzing a specific situation for lessons learned.
Eventually, you'll reach a point where very few situations require a deeper analysis, but you only get there because of the previous analyses.
Never looked at it from that perspective, but this makes a lot of sense.
Thank you for clarifying what I am going through and adding fuel to my study chief! I am ready to overthink like a champ now. :)
