Former Community – We Moved
🆕 Coached community here, for posts & feedback public community here.
Hi, former extremely submissive religious cult member
Hi,
I am 19 and from Turkey. I have an online business.
Until 18, I was a member of a religious (Islam) cult because of my whole family are part of it. We believed (I don't anymore) the cult leader was directly speaking to Allah(God in Islam) and his lectures are coming from God directly.
Beside the religious lectures, there were social behavior lectures. These lectures was teaching being extreme submissive to be high-level in the eyes of God. Some examples of social behavior lectures :
- Give without asking back, apologize even in front of disrespect
- Serve others without expecting back, value others more than yourself (because that means "valuing God")
- Be kind (this is good), even in front of disrespect (this is not)
I spent my whole time in high school by applying these lectures in my life, guess what happened in the class?
Everyone loved me, no one respected me.
I was so much on warmth and very low on power. These were all done consciously by me.
Video until 1.14 (9 second)
Girls:Â You are very kind and nice!
Me:Â (Good, then why are you girlfriend of other unkind boys in the class?)
Boys: You are good man, we love you!
Me: (Good, then why do you look away and not pay attention when i speak?)
Simple, they didn't respect me because of my extreme submissiveness.
Then I started to learn science and quit from cult. While keep learning about science and psychology, i found myself here.
Welcome here, JoyfulMan!
Man, that sounds like a rough time, glad you're out of that, and happy to have you here.
Thank you for sharing your experience. Not only for getting to know you better, but also because we're still brainstorming the copywriting for Power University and your thoughts here further validate a point another forum member, Bel, made about the value he saw in (TPM and) PU: it's more than just for learning advanced social skills, it's a (science-backed) way to get you more respect from others.
Looking forward to learning and growing with you mate.
Cheers!
Hello, Joyfulman
It's a pleasure to meet you. Islam is a very beautiful religion, with an admirable history and tradition, and it saddens me to hear that it's being used by scoundrels and false prophets to manipulate people into blind obedience. Thankfully you got out of that cult, and I hope your family may find their way out too.
And it's great news that you are high in warmth. It's half the job already done before you even found us!
Be very welcome, man
Hi, Joyful man,
It's good to meet you. It's a pretty toxic environment you went through and it's an absolutely amazing feeling to have recognised it and moved away.
I can relate to your experience as even I had grew up with extremely religious parents who also thought that being assertive and dominant is disrespectful to others and brings shame to the family.
Funny thing is how they never considered it disrespectful when they were being aggressive and verbally abusive.
Looking forward to grow together.
Cheers,
Hello Joyful man!
Thank you for sharing your background, good to see you here, and glad you realized so early on about the cult's toxic nonsense (most cult leaders don't exactly love their followers being empowered).
Hats off to you for "awakening": from the outside, it seems obvios. But doing it while you're in it, and doing it so young and while your whole family is still in it is quite impressive and a major life victory already.
Quote from Kavalier on January 3, 2023, 3:38 pmHello, Joyfulman
It's a pleasure to meet you. Islam is a very beautiful religion, with an admirable history and tradition, and it saddens me to hear that it's being used by scoundrels and false prophets to manipulate people into blind obedience. Thankfully you got out of that cult, and I hope your family may find their way out too.
And it's great news that you are high in warmth. It's half the job already done before you even found us!
Be very welcome, man
Thank you Kavalier,
This background and TPM showed me how important is to understand manipulation & defend yourself.
Quote from Growfast on January 3, 2023, 4:45 pmHi, Joyful man,
It's good to meet you. It's a pretty toxic environment you went through and it's an absolutely amazing feeling to have recognised it and moved away.
I can relate to your experience as even I had grew up with extremely religious parents who also thought that being assertive and dominant is disrespectful to others and brings shame to the family.
Funny thing is how they never considered it disrespectful when they were being aggressive and verbally abusive.
Looking forward to grow together.
Cheers,
Thanks Growfast,
Similar family environment we do have. It's considered disrespectful even small assertiveness against especially relatives.
Quote from Ali Scarlett on January 3, 2023, 2:27 pmWelcome here, JoyfulMan!
Man, that sounds like a rough time, glad you're out of that, and happy to have you here.
Thank you for sharing your experience. Not only for getting to know you better, but also because we're still brainstorming the copywriting for Power University and your thoughts here further validate a point another forum member, Bel, made about the value he saw in (TPM and) PU: it's more than just for learning advanced social skills, it's a (science-backed) way to get you more respect from others.
Looking forward to learning and growing with you mate.
Cheers!
Thank you Ali Scarlett
Quote from Lucio Buffalmano on January 3, 2023, 4:56 pmThank you for sharing your background, good to see you here, and glad you realized so early on about the cult's toxic nonsense (most cult leaders don't exactly love their followers being empowered).
I did some research, they also use similar techniques like
- Creating rank based hierarchy to make themselves look like much more powerful (I was dreaming to reach the rank just below cult leader, that was the last-rank a normal person could go)
- Making themselves harder to contact (Majority of members and I haven't even spoken and seen him in real life)
- Making members submissive as much as possible to make them loyal and serving to cult (charing money, some works etc.)
