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Is it possible to get my ex back?
A few months back (around november) me and this other girl got into contact while I was in a relationship, it was nothing romantic or sexual though, she previously helped me with a project I was doing, then we became friends and we just had regular chats. I also happened to like a instagram photo of hers that had her ass in the last slide (horrible mistake, I know) and my now ex counted that as cheating. We also happened to be in a long distance relationship with eachother while the girl who's post I liked is in the same city. My ex has basically said that she's over long distanced dating while also admitting she still has feelings for me, is there anything I could do to win her back?
Hello, it’s not very clear to me. Did you guys break up over you liking her picture?
Well it seems she was under the impression that I tried to pursue a relationship with this girl and doesn't believe I did it out of pure professionalism, and she was also very upset by the way I handled it being "Oh, well my bad I'm sorry that I made you feel a way about it, I'll unlike it." and just believes I'm a straight up liar.
Just some random notes:
- Is it possible to get back with my ex? Of course it is. Is it possible in your situation? Maybe yes. But next is : do you have the know-how to pull that off? Not sure...
- How to do that? We can't say without a lot more details -or at least, I can't-
- Should you try that? Maybe yes... Or may be you can move on
- There may be bigger issues. It strikes me as rather odd to breakup over liking a picture.
Could be waaay too jealous, the "straw that broke the camel back", an excuse, or that you handled all that came after that not.
Heck, may even be a power move ot make you chase and re-negotiate the relationship on her terms (you inviting her to live with you, or you moving).
Or a mix of them all.
Hello Flacko2Nice,
I see it the same way: excessive jealousy. Personally in this situation I would choose to move on. It seems this situation is not win-win, and I'm even wondering if it's not lose-lose. Long distance relationships are very costly emotionally. So I would stay with the person on 2 conditions:
- She's the woman of my dreams
- There is a time in the future when we would live in the same place
If either of these conditions are not met I would move on. I'm guessing (could be wrong) that you both are quite young. It's totally normal to have several relationships before finding the right person.
In case of a break up, I would see if the other woman is compatible. It seems she is. So maybe you and your GF know that she's actually a better fit (personality wise), hence the jealousy.
And mostly, I would not accept the frame of "being a cheater". This is low. She can say she felt you cheated on her and up to her to elaborate then. Otherwise I don't think you cheated on her. Not in the sense that most people use it nowadays. If there's emotionally cheating, then it's another story. But that would mean you're in love with her. Otherwise it's normal to be attracted to other women and/or flirt with them. That being said, I would not talk nor show it to my GF.
In short, I don't think there's a reason to feel bad beyond a mistake (probably due to lack of experience). So it's normal to make experiences and grow from them.
When it comes to the "breaking the camel's back" I think that's true, she said I was never really intimate in the way where I told her things about myself or went in depth about my day, nearing the end of the relationship I tried to start implementing it after she asked but I'm guessing it was too late to make a difference.
I never accepted the frame that I cheated on her, not at all, I told her I infact felt offended she thought I would even look at another woman in that light.
Do I have the "Know-how" on how to get her back, I have no idea admittedly. She's a very blunt person, not that this means she couldn't use this as an excuse, but it just doesn't seem likely in my eyes. She definitely did agree that my nonchalant attitude about did very much make her even more angry with me.
