Please or Register to create posts and topics.

Where to Live In The World (Was: Leaving Switzerland)

You could spend the next 10 years twiddling your thumbs and having no interaction with women whatsoever. Then travel somewhere where your SMV is 5 times higher and where age matters far less, pick an attractive 20-something, and take her back.

Good point. That's what I'm considering as a plan B. Maybe not 20-something but yes. What I'm finding frustrating for someone in my situation is the poor choice of mates and the fact that despite having made a lot of effort in my own self-development and career, it does not translate in interesting matin opportunities.

Another good and simple technique to cope with the long winters is to take your holidays during January.

Good point. Makes sense.

Hello Lucio,

I’ll be in Berlin in a couple of days. Would you have some recommendations for neighborhood or places to check out for considering living there?

Thanks!

Awesome!

Try both West and East, there is a very different feel.

In the West, check out "Kudamm", starting from "Wittembergplatz".

From Wittembergplatz, you can dip into the Tiergarten and have a look at how much green is within reach, and the you can stroll down on Kudamm to take a look at the crowd of shopping women to get an idea of the quality.

For a drink later in the evening you can either do Kreuzberg -more "left-wing" style-, Hackescher markt/Torstrasse area, or check out the Monkey bar still near Wittembergplatz for a more upscale venue.

 

John Freeman has reacted to this post.
John Freeman
Have you read the forum guidelines for effective communication already?

Thank you very much!

I’m more into tattoos and pierced girls (not too much nor crazy) open-minded traveller type than the dogmatic feminist radical left type or the greedy capitalist type.

Cool smart positive sexy girls (tall blondes with big boobs) basically. They tend to be more left than right though.

Hello guys,

what is your opinion about living in London? Berlin compared to London for instance?

For me, I have a love-hate relationship with London: it's very diverse and the whole World is in London. However, I feel that Life is so much about money that it becomes unhealthy. Also, I feel that for dating you really need to have a really high status and income to be attractive in London.

Regarding Oslo, that is the main reason I want to go there (1:26):

Eheheh interesting, I suppose it's about the girl's type, and not about the language? 🙂
Looks like a proper viking descendant, stoic and confident :D.

About London, I've been there only a few times and one of my childhood friends is there.

Yeah, it's a huge city, which is a plus in many ways.
It's a bit "rough", as a former Irish flatmate of mine who also lived there described it.

For dating, I don't have direct experience.
If I look at all the dating coaches that hailed from UK, it seems like a good chunk of them are either having low to average success, mostly approaching tourists, or traveling to Eastern Europe.

I would guess that with all those people you can find enough diversity for all tastes, including plenty of women who are not after the bling. But it's certainly possible that money and status matter a bit more than in other cities.
The plentyful high-paying jobs from the financial district, coupled with the big differences in prices and living conditions in different districts also probably contribute to skewing the game towards status/income.

 

John Freeman and Stef have reacted to this post.
John FreemanStef
Have you read the forum guidelines for effective communication already?
Quote from Lucio Buffalmano on September 24, 2020, 5:58 am

Eheheh interesting, I suppose it's about the girl's type, and not about the language? ?
Looks like a proper viking descendant, stoic and confident :D.

Yes it is 😉

Regarding London, I did some research: in terms of quality of Life it ranks lower than Berlin. Especially in terms of transportation and housing. Generally speaking, people report more stressful lives. To me London is Paris’ sister city in terms of rat race. I’m not saying I would not go but so far I value less unneeded stress.

So I finished my 2 weeks holiday in Germany. I went to Cologne, Hamburg, Leipzig, Dresden and Berlin. I liked the 3 last cities the best (eastern Germany). As said earlier I find that left-leaning cities are more welcoming.

Berlin

@Lucio: thank you for your recommendation. It is among my choices of cities to live now. It’s my 2nd time I go there. I visited specifically the city with the idea of living there.

Vibe: Berlin is very international and diverse in terms of people, with different neighborhoods and their different population. It is a large city with a vibe of a smaller city, which I like. There are a lot of green spaces and water. It has a relaxed vibe. People are quite open and easy to talk to. Compared to Switzerland it is dirtier but still ok. Some shops and bars are open 24 hours. Berlin is one of the cities that never sleeps. Bars and nightlife are top notch in Berlin. Huge diversity of food choices.

Transportation: Lots of bikes and roads are adapted to them. However I would say that there are still too many cars for my taste. That being said it is very easy to get away from the large roads and the noise.

Dating market: many blonde and redhead girls. Bigger boobs than western Germany on average. Pretty girls are looking at me not like in Switzerland where girls don’t. Lots of alternative girls. A great dating market for me I believe.

Work: salary is less than Switzerland but I would get to improve my German which is helpful in Switzerland. I checked the hospital and it’s a bit run-down but I think the quality of care and research done there is good. That being said I could see how much Switzerland’s wealth helps us to have World-class hospital and universities.

So I was happy to sample another Germanic Protestant country.

My list looks now like this

1. Large European cities with relaxed vibe, bike transport: Amsterdam or Berlin

2. Smaller cities with good work-life balance: Oslo, Copenhagen, Stockholm

So thank you very much for your feed-back, Lucio. I agree with your perspective on Berlin. I really like this city. I think it’s number 1 selling point is the people with their open attitude and also the green spaces and the nature really close to the city.

Regarding Amsterdam, I think it is way more beautiful than Berlin, overall. Also, the biking is better as bikes are kings in the Netherlands. So I would say that between these two cities it’s a matter of personal preference and opportunities. Even if Berlin is larger, I realized that there is a lot of “waste”. I mean: yes there are a lot of sushi places, but what’s the point if only one out of 5 or 10 is good. Yes you can get cheap sushi at every corner but if it’s not an enjoyable experience what’s the point? So I’m not sure Berlin’s size is a major advantage compared to Amsterdam.

So my next steps are:

  1. Do 1-2 days of observation in the university hospitals of these 5 cities.
  2. Research the dating market with OkCupid of these cities.

I’m also finding that I live in one of the best countries I think. That being said I met a Swiss friend from Zurich in Berlin and he left because he could not stand anymore the narrow-mindedness, like me.

So I’m happy I found in Berlin a city where I feel I could be myself without the fear of being judged or ignored.

 

Awesome, John!

I was looking forward to your thoughts on this.

Another idea for you: join groups like "Swiss in Berlin" / "Swiss in Amsterdam".

And then you can things like "what you like most here / what you dislike most", and get some good intel.

 

Stef has reacted to this post.
Stef
Have you read the forum guidelines for effective communication already?

Hello Lucio,

that is a great idea, thank you! Otherwise, for those interested, this is a page that I found to be very accurate about the Swiss culture:

Doing business in Switzerland

Especially this part, it might sound like a lot of adjective but it is the most accurate description of the Swiss mindset I came across so far, meaning the most accurate generalization, of course there are outliers:

David Hampshire, author of the book, “Living and Working in Switzerland” aptly describes the Swiss as,”Scrupulously honest, narrow-minded, industrious, pessimistic, boring, hygienic, taciturn, healthy, insular, tidy, frugal, sober, selfish, spotless, educated, insecure, introverted, hard working, perfect, religious, rigid, arrogant, affluent, conservative, isolated, private, strait-laced, neutral, authoritarian, formal, responsible, self-critical, unfriendly, stoical, materialistic, impatient, ambitious, intolerant, unromantic, reliable, conscientious, obstinate, efficient, square, enterprising, humorless, unloved (too rich), obedient, liberal, thrifty, stolid, orderly, staid, placid, insensitive, patriotic, xenophobic, courteous, meticulous, inventive, prejudiced, conventional, intelligent, virtuous, smug, loyal, punctual, egotistical, serious, bourgeois, cautious, dependable, polite, reserved or shy, law-abiding and a good skier”.

Also the part describing the kind of "openness" you can find in Switzerland, which is why I and other people have been confused on this topic. Switzerland is liberal for economical matters.

While openness towards technology may give the Swiss an air of daring-do — do not be misled. The Swiss tend towards conservatism, empirical-thinking and prefer to stick to the rules. Swiss culture remains ethnocentric – a strong belief in ones own cultural group – and maintains a cautious attitude towards outside influences.

Also I found this data, which explains that where I live is not the most open place and is quite neurotic and introvert. So I would say I have 3 other cities I can consider in Switzerland: 1. Basel (most open), 2. Zurich, 3. Geneva. If you guys don't know about the big 5:

Source

Hello guys,

so on the 5th of January, I achieved one of my yearly goals: I found a place where to go in 1 or 2 years.

Montreal, Canada

As much as I hate to recognise it, I don't receive good training. I was feeling frustrated the past 2 months, because all that is expected of me in the university hospital where I work is: examine patients, write letters, organize imaging and labs. All this with an attitude of obedience and deference. As you know I adapted to that. However, this is way below my standards from what I have experienced before. I was lucky to study in one of the top 10 engineering school in the World, or at least considered so. That is why I can not stand my current professional standard: I find the environment to be mediocre.

However, I'm stuck there until I get my specialty degree. I could move earlier but that would be more challenging. I'm still considering the option but I think the cost outweighs the benefits: I will have to do exams for my degree to be recognised in Canada.

My goal was: find a place to do an internship in 2022. So I did.

I spoke yesterday with one of my supervisors and he told me like many other people that Montreal is everything people say it is: focussed on teaching, you get a lot of respect (not deference) at the hospital from the personnel (not like where I am right now), it's more equalitarian (once you're a paediatrician, there are not 3-5 levels of hierarchy, but just 1: all people are paediatricians, some with more experience, some with less).

I also heard good things about Perth, Australia.

Wherever I go, I made the choice to prioritise like this:

  1. Hospital: work is where we spend most of our time. If we're unhappy at work, we're unhappy period.
  2. Dating market: I'm not planning on staying single my whole life. Where I live is a shit dating market.

The only problem is that I feel that I'm wasting time where I live. So I'll have to consider what is needed to go 1 year earlier to Canada.

I will still be exploring other options such as: NZ, Australia, Norway, Denmark, Netherlands.

So far, I've not chosen Berlin, because the culture is too similar to Switzerland: too hierarchical. If you're an entrepreneur, it's another spiel. But if you work in a hospital, it matters.

Today, is an important step for me as I found 1 viable option. Now, it's about creating abundance: more options. The worst downside of Canada is that it's far away from Europe and I love Europe. Also they have 2-3 weeks holiday compared to 4-5 weeks in Europe. However, I cannot stand anymore this conservative mentality.

Countries that are very hierarchical are great once you are at the top. Then it's easypeasy. But when you're at the bottom it's shit. And then even if you get at the top you participate in this lame way of leading people. Big hierarchies are not win-win to me. Because only a few people are winning while all the other ones are losing. So it's a lose-win structure.

Also, Canada is close to the US, so my end goal is to make my company and I think it's a good opportunity to be close to the US for that matters. My colleague also told me that you get to go to all the American seminars and that's where most of the knowledge get made.

Dating market in Montreal is also more favourable. There is also lots of Nature in Canada, unlike the Netherlands. So it's a relief for me to have found this option. It renewed my motivation. Now I know what my hospital wants (which is stupid) so I can deliver what they want while I learn what I want and need on the side. I started to study pediatrics again this morning, thanks to that.

I'm also very close to finding my specialty. So I'm moving forward.

F#%k them. Soon, I'll be gone! 🙂

Lucio Buffalmano has reacted to this post.
Lucio Buffalmano