Looking at her like you want to "do naughty things to her"
Hi Guys.
I was watching this video by Dan Bacon where he says that a way to arouse a woman (who is into you) into thinking about sex and wanting sex is simply "looking at her like you want to do naughty things to her" (1:11 to 3:55):
I am interested in knowing if any of you has tried out this same "technique", either in a relationship or while meeting a woman, and if it worked.
Personally, the first time I did this was many many years ago, and it was unwitting. Only now I see the connection.
I hopped on a bus in the evening, and looked at a woman (and I probably unconsciously did what Dan Bacon explains), and went to talk to her.
After one minute or two of talking, she told me:
Her: When you saw me, you looked all up and down my body.
Which surprised me because I was not aware of having done so, and I even told her so!
I was also just starting out figuring these things.
Well: five minutes later she invited me to her house - and I said no and didn't go, since she had told me she was living with a man.
Now I see her "invite" may have been directly related to how I looked at her.
This shows the same thing in action:
I guess the discussion here aims also at understanding how soon after meeting a woman one can do this, and if anyone has experience of using this as soon as one meets - or if it can backfire.
It's situational.
I have a different opinion than most as I think in cold approach warmth is one of those cases where warmth is more important than power.
Unless one is obviously super tense, scared, or super submissive, a cold approach from a stranger is already pre-framed as high power and potentially tense for a woman.
That makes warmth more important than power and/or sexual boldness.
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Thank you, Lucio.
I fully subscribe to your view, ie that it's better to handle cold approaches by focusing on more warmth.
In fact I remember that one turning point for me was realizing I did have to avoid going overboard in showing "boldness"; I even started apologizing if I came on too strong or if I interrupted conversations with her friends.
I guess then that the case above was an exception that depended more on her state/mood than anything else.
EDIT: Dan Bacon roleplaying the sleazy and insecure guys in the video above, for comparison, is simply awesome! 🙂
And another thing: I believe your depth in understanding power dynamics makes an infinite difference between what you teach and what everyone else teaches in dating.
Their level - and subsequent results - simply cannot compare to TPM's.
Thank you for the kind words, Bel!
Yeah, in a relationship, it's a totally different dynamics.
In SU there are several really good video examples actually of a similar dynamic, the "predator prey" (plus a pic of me of boozed up me + reaction).
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Quote from Lucio Buffalmano on May 28, 2023, 10:31 pmIt's situational.
I have a different opinion than most as I think in cold approach warmth is one of those cases where warmth is more important than power.
Unless one is obviously super tense, scared, or super submissive, a cold approach from a stranger is already pre-framed as high power and potentially tense for a woman.
That makes warmth more important than power and/or sexual boldness.
Appreciate your comment Lucio!
I am curious, what if the woman gave you the "roll her eyes" look when you cold approached her, either in daytime or at night bars? You can sense she was thinking "not another guy again" and was being cold when you talked to her.
Would you still continue to go with warmth, or try to challenge her in this case? From what I read at TPM, warmth is only appropriate if she sees you as high-power.
OFF-TOPIC
Quote from vicknick on June 4, 2023, 10:04 amAppreciate your comment Lucio!I am curious, what if the woman gave you the "roll her eyes" look when you cold approached her, either in daytime or at night bars? You can sense she was thinking "not another guy again" and was being cold when you talked to her.
Would you still continue to go with warmth, or try to challenge her in this case? From what I read at TPM, warmth is only appropriate if she sees you as high-power.
Hello Vicknick,
Feel free to open a new thread for this as it's a very interesting scenario, but it would be off-topic here.
(And try to come up with your own "solution / answer" for exercise 🙂
OFF-TOPIC
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