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Mansplaining frame-control
Love how this man goes from target to attacker:
Her: I love this mansplaining (uses a loaded word to judge him and shame him)
Him: you loving what? (surfaces and thread-expands: simply by having to explain, she loses power, she reacts to him, he gains control of the frame, and he's got time to think and strategize)
Her: (loses her plot: simply realizing the victim is not a victim is often enough for the aggressor to lose steam)
Do you think we can use the same technique here?
Person: That's why I have send you all the relevant information previously.
I love how italian you are sometimes.
That's why we have Porsche and you have FiatYou: You loving what? (or You loving Italian?)
Quote from Matthew Whitewood on September 15, 2021, 12:47 pm
Do you think we can use the same technique here?
Person: That's why I have send you all the relevant information previously.
I love how italian you are sometimes.
That's why we have Porsche and you have FiatYou: You loving what? (or You loving Italian?)
I feel like in the video it was a face to face communication so asking 'What?' Can have the reason of being a knee jerk reaction to something that he is not aware of.
On text the 'What? ' question can come across as aggressive since you can already see what is written. So I feel it's better to ask in this example
You : What is "Italian" supposed to mean here?
These are my thoughts
I totally see your point. Thanks for sharing!
Growfast: I feel like in the video it was a face to face communication so asking 'What?' Can have the reason of being a knee jerk reaction to something that he is not aware of.
Reminds me of what Lucio explains in this clip of Judge Judy against this man:
Judge Judy: How many?
Man: About 4
Judge Judy: About 4? What do you mean about 4? What does that mean? About 4?
Man: Erm about 4 of them including your daughter
Judge Judy: What are you talking about?
Here Judge Judy's immediate reaction to the man's sarcastic joke "including your daughter" was a great tactic to put the ball back in his court.
It shows that you are calm, and it frames the other person as talking nonsense.
This has a similar dynamic here:
Her: I love this mansplaining (uses a loaded word to judge him and shame him)
Him: you loving what? (surfaces and thread-expands: simply by having to explain, she loses power, she reacts to him, he gains control of the frame, and he's got time to think and strategize)
I see that, in the text example, it's different.
And he's kind of hiding behind the joking frame rather than the stronger, sarcastic insinuation of the lady in the video.
It does sound harder to retort in my opinion without looking too aggressive.
Maybe something like
Tell me what you like about Porsche :)
Quote from Growfast on September 15, 2021, 1:04 pmQuote from Matthew Whitewood on September 15, 2021, 12:47 pm(...)
Do you think we can use the same technique here?
Person: That's why I have send you all the relevant information previously.
I love how italian you are sometimes.
That's why we have Porsche and you have FiatYou: You loving what? (or You loving Italian?)
I feel like in the video it was a face to face communication so asking 'What?' Can have the reason of being a knee jerk reaction to something that he is not aware of.
On text the 'What? ' question can come across as aggressive since you can already see what is written. So I feel it's better to ask in this example
You : What is "Italian" supposed to mean here?
These are my thoughts
Yeah, I agree with Growfast.
There are times when "what" on a text can work great, but not in that specific example.
