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Philosophy - good for frames and bad for self development?

Lately, I discussed with a friend that has strong philosophical tendencies, I hold an opinion about men and women roles when he takes the “philosopher frame” I didn’t surprise but instead of negotiating the frame with him, he left me speechless…

it was something like that:

me: men are naturally more actively engaged than women regarding financially support their family

him: and what makes you believe so?

me: it’s not about my personal beliefs, that’s just human nature and science, hundreds of researches are proving that.

him: and what makes that true? Do you know how many researches had proved 700 years ago that the world is flat? Give them another 100 years and they will change their theories all over again.

me: (confused)

him: you can’t know shit, it’s only opinions and beliefs.

me: so you telling me you don’t believe in science? Logic?

him: you can’t know anything outside yourself.

me: (shocked and slightly disregarding) wait, you believe you are the only person who exists?

him: personally I don’t, but that is very possible,  more than that, you can’t even know that “you” exist, the only thing you can know is that a thought is occurring.

me: (speechless)

That’s was like postmodernism on steroids, the more I tried to answer, the more questions that lead nowhere I got. later I tried to read about it and it’s only made me more concerned and confused, I’m wondering if I should keep looking for answers cause personally It’s indeed going to dead-end road with those (I believe) conclusions:

1. Our language and our reason are very limited to describe or understand things like “objective truth”, “objective meaning” and such.

2. All philosophies in the end are based on not/can’t proved axioms.

3.  Interestingly western philosophy tend to be both more rational and paradoxical than eastern one, drop logic to some extent and you can “know” (or believe to know) things more easily.

4. There is some quantum physics theories that seems (not an expert) to support the idea of unlogical things (opposites that exist in the same time -ödinger%27s_cat ) and even of matter that change when we take perception of it.


Well that’s my take, I’m not professional on this but I do wonder if keep digging for more understanding or it’s a waste of time and even slightly mentally damaging, anyone experienced something similar?

IF you're looking for effectiveness in life, it's not the best use of your time.

Otherwise, it can be interesting, not mentally damaging, but don't expect to get many practical benefits from it.

This deserves its own post and I'm going to add it "Ultimate Power", but you can see self-development in these stages:

  1. Control / power over the environment (focused on effectiveness, increasing one's one power, achieving goals)
  2. Mental health (what insecurities, if any, lead me to push so hard on myself and others?)
  3. Enlightenment (rising above the needs of achieving goals, the needs of being validated by others, reaching a stage of constant happiness)

Most people learning power dynamics are focused on controlling the environment.
These types of theories are a waste of time in that sense.

Also check out this post on similar topics.

Here are some ways to answer them:

Him: and what makes that true? Do you know how many researches had proved 700 years ago that the world is flat? Give them another 100 years and they will change their theories all over again.
You: Not true.
They believed the earth was flat based on religious dogmas, and sheep-like following, NOT science. As a matter of fact, the more scientifically-oriented Romans knew the earth was spherical

You could go forward with frame negotiation and embrace some of his philosophy:

You: it's certainly possible the earth is flat.
But in this reality we live and measure, you're far, FAR better off and far, FAR more effective acting with a round earth. You took a plane at least once in your life, right (power move)... ?

When he says "yes", you tell him that the plane he took takes trajectories that are based on a round earth.
That frames him as a theoretical philosopher and self-frames you as a pragmatic, practical man who achieves results in this world we can know and measure -the one matters the most to achieve life-relevant goals that 99.x% of people strive for and reward you for-.

People usually respect the pragmatic man far more.

Fixed couple of mistakes

TheDucas and Transitioned have reacted to this post.
Have you read the forum guidelines for effective communication already?

Yeah, that's a far better answer than mine lol 😂 I was so shocked even I read a bit about philosophy, but never really dwell into it until this point, it's indeed very abstract and hard to grasp and therefore naturally have those limitations and (some) advantages of people keep asking questions that no one can answer. 😂

I'm loudly thinking though that some branches of it like nihilism and postmodernism (that some will debate are increasing in society) can potentially be bad for society, and others like existentialism and solipsism can potentially be bad for the self, especially when (withim my short experience) it seems that there isn't a way to 100% prove it wrong and some people crave that certainty.