Please or Register to create posts and topics.

Reputation at work

Hello guys,

this is a larger topic in case people want to share their own stories here. I have a question:

Experience

The other day we were having a drink at a female colleague's place. There was a male colleague of mine is a peer (=equal). He's younger than me by about 10 years as most are. However he's been doing this job longer than I have and have been immersed in the domain for longer.  He talked about our reputation (of two of the colleagues present: me and another female (not the host)) at our previous rotation. This was the rotation where nurses are dysfunctional and manipulate a lot. There are so many threads talking about these people on this forum, I'm amazed looking back. Anyway, he had been working there for 18 months so they accepted him and trusted him more. I think he was also more skilled at the time he was there than me at the time I was there. So basically, he implied that me and her have a bad reputation over there. I also think that the nurses kind of flattered him and he's on their side" because they're telling him that he's such a great doctor.

I said: "I know I have a bad reputation over there (I was drunk, not the best answer at all!) but I don't care what they think."

I gave him an example where he did not follow protocol and the nurses still did what he said. If I would have done the same, they would have disobeyed my order. So there was a bias and he was not seeing it.

Analysis

As I say: he struggled a lot to get where he is. Now he has the aura of the "guy who's good at what he does" and he's proud of it. That's a good thing. However, I think  that to take sides with dysfunctional and manipulative colleagues (he did not perceive this) against peers is not so good. I believe.

Question

What do you think of this situation?

Behavior

I'm considering asking him what do they say about me and the other female colleague. What do you think of this approach?

Cheers!

Hi John,

Here are my thoughts:

Relationship with Him

How close would you say you are to this person?

Alcohol

Quote from John Freeman on March 2, 2021, 7:06 am

I said: "I know I have a bad reputation over there (I was drunk, not the best answer at all!) but I don't care what they think."

This reminds me of my sleep-deprived days.
I am not as sharp too.

I recalled Lucio said the dynamics of being drunk is quite different.
I personally am not very sure of this dynamic.

Analysing His Behaviour

He's younger than me by about 10 years as most are. However he's been doing this job longer than I have and have been immersed in the domain for longer.

Would you say that your experience in other areas adds up to being ahead in your career over this person?
Sometimes I find some of my experience "wasted" in the career sense but not in the personal development sense.

I don't think that he's justified to talk about reputation.
That's for management and superiors.
And good managers don't comment on your reputation publicly.
They give potentially negative feedback in private.

So it sounds like social climbing to me that he comments on your reputation and your female colleague's reputation.
If everyone was kind of tipsy with alcohol flowing, they may not take his comment so seriously.
They may even think that he is an alpha posturer.

I wasn't there in person so not very sure if I'm interpreting this correctly.

Now he has the aura of the "guy who's good at what he does" and he's proud of it. That's a good thing. However, I think  that to take sides with dysfunctional and manipulative colleagues (he did not perceive this) against peers is not so good.

He sounds like a brilliant but arrogant type of worker.
Commenting on a colleague's reputation is a power move as well.
It sets up the frame that he can evaluate someone at the same level of the hierarchy.

Maybe some of these manipulative colleagues have power-aligned with him because he is good at his work.
This is a guess as I am unaware of the general office politics.

Should You Ask Him for Feedback on Your Reputation?

Behavior

I'm considering asking him what do they say about me and the other female colleague. What do you think of this approach?

Personally, it seems like he's a social climber.
I'm not sure if he will give you accurate feedback.

I think that it could be a good idea to stay out of gossip.
If you have been delivering solid work, you can stay above the fray.

Maybe you have an intention to gather intelligence?
That could be a good idea.

John Freeman has reacted to this post.
John Freeman

Since he based his FIGJAM on the nurses good opinion.  You could have zinged him ' My bad I didn't realise the nurses were running the hospital'. And then change topic 'Anyway what I m interested in is...'. The subtext is he should pay more attention to doctors opinions - the you re not one of us attack

Or another option open up ' Hey obviously you be had more time in that unit.  And you seem to get on with the nurses.  Any tips?'