Former Community – We Moved
🆕 Coached community here, for posts & feedback public community here.
Status enslaves you, power lieberates you
From a texbook I'm reading/researching:
since status relies on others, concerns about maintaining one’s status will orient status-holders outward, as they will be focused on monitoring where they stand vis-à-vis the status-conferral process
(...)
As such, high-status parties (who presumably wish to maintain their high-status position) will not only be vigilant about monitoring status-conferral processes but will also be particularly vigilant about maintaining social relations in a manner that prompts continued respect and esteem from others. That is, they will strive to fulfill others’ expectations that high-status parties show consideration and act in a manner that warrants their high-status position (Blader and Chen 2012; Ridgeway 1978, 1982)
Compared to power:
This description of the effects of status stands in stark contrast to the effects of power, which liberates people from social and normative pressures and enables them to shift their focus inward, toward their own goals and dispositions (Galinsky et al. 2008; Guinote 2007; Keltner et al. 2003).
Yep, agree.
Status is a game that you gotta play.
It's very important in life to know how to play that game -especially the "foundational" game of status for which the rules apply across different groups, see "alpha male" for men for example-.
However, it's still a game that as much as it has rewards, it also has rules that you gotta submit to.
This is why TPM ultimately say you also want to "fly higher" than any game of status.
Boom just boom!
Thanks a lot for sharing. I think it's a very important concept.
I can now see thanks to you that I made a good decision regarding my social circle. I decided a few months ago not to invest as much in it. That is, I'm ok to lose a bit of status, not to be the center/the guy who initiates a lot in order to gain more freedom. Otherwise, there is a loyalty to our social circle that becomes costly in terms of freedom. Of course, it's important to be loyal to our friends. I meant over-loyalty as in being part of everything that the group does or having to be the one organizing stuff.
This also feeds into the "alpha" vs "sigma" discussion. I don't know what's your opinion on it: if you think it's bullshit or not. Anyway, the idea is that the alpha must be part of a group and therefore has less freedom than the sigma who still is high-power high-dominance but is not bound to a group. Of course, this is not taking into account all the benefits of being an alpha, only the difference in freedom.
Another example, the WA group that is now used by us to communicate is not a group I created despite being the one that put the group together. But I let it go because it does not really matter. What matter is to have a WA group where we can communicate. Status vs Power.
