Quote from John Freeman on March 25, 2021, 3:06 pm

Hello guys,

in another post I talked about "Thank YOU" (could not find it) which is about returning the thanking when it's not due. For instance a waiter thanking you whereas you should be thanking them.

What is "thank you?"

Thank you is actually a sign of gratitude. This means you acknowledge a social debt. You received something from someone. You owe them something. So as I became more aware of the social exchange theory, I'm way more careful about how I use "thank you". I'm also more careful about who says it to me.

This post is to emphasize these important words for social intelligence. It means:

1. Do use them when you feel someone has given something to you. ("Thank you!")
2. Don't use them with someone who has not given anything to you.  ("Ok")

But also:

1. Do expect them when you have given something to someone (otherwise you allow credit scalping)
2. Don't accept them when you are the one who should be thankful ("thank YOU")

Any inputs are welcome, of course.

Cheers!