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The 4 Fundamental Strategies of Power

Hi Lucio,

For starters, I want to say that I'm loving your work more and more each day. It's also interesting to me how all of this information seems like a "secret" to power. I recently read a book by Jay McGraw (foreword by Phillip C. McGraw, author of Life Strategies) that said, "...people 'size you up' based upon the way you present yourself to the world. Through that presentation...they decide how to treat you."

The masses of men believe power is resources and that resources are just money. However, there are a few individuals (mostly entrepreneurs) out of the masses that understand resources to be both money and connections, which is where your course and blog really shine through. By consistently studying what you have to teach, I can adjust how I act and approach daily situations more social powerfully to be perceived as more of a high-quality and high-status man which ethically influences people to treat me as such.

I recently started reading your latest post: The 4 Fundamental Strategies of Power

First, I like how you detail the steps to framing an interaction as collaborative. In entrepreneurship, CEO Patrick-Bet David refers to this as "adjusting your lens" at his 2019 Keynote Speech: Think Like A Grand Master Entrepreneur  (minute mark 7:58-12:35).

I'd like your thoughts on how this ties into networking. I took a course in networking, which encouraged a step-by-step formula to get the attention of important, connected people that you meet so you stand out in a way that they remember you. This formula relied on a science that is used by the "charismatic" style of dominance. This science is explained by Simon Sinek in his talk: Start with Why -- How Great Leaders Inspire Action (minute mark 0:20-8:01).

So, for example, if you were an actor and I asked you, "So, what do you do?" or "Tell me about yourself," most people would answer somewhere along the lines of, "Well, my name is (insert name here), and I'm an actor. I've done a couple film and TV projects. You may have seen me on...". Most people start with the "What", move to the "How" and then sometimes include their "Why" (the majority of people won't include their why because they feel like it's oversharing).

What (they do): "I'm an actor"

How: I am an actor because "I've done a couple film and TV projects"

Why: (Not shared.)

Charismatic leaders, however, start with a "Why", then move to their "How" and finally their "What".

Example:

"I believe everyone deserves to be truly seen and understood. This is why I'm committed to understanding people's perspectives. I'm grateful to be an actor. To give a voice to the voiceless."

By responding this way, you inspire people to want to collaborate with you. I also feel that this encourages the right kind of social power. One that leans more towards doing business with people who believe what you believe, not just anyone that has what you're looking for. Please correct me if I'm wrong, I'm still the student here, but acting as a charismatic leader that's on a mission should lead to building more trust with those that want and choose to follow you than just relying on the power of the law of the social exchange. 

On another note, something I can't seem to understand is your position on enemies and "frenemies". You say, "Enemies disempower. Avoid making enemies and seek to make friends and allies."

This statement contradicts what Robert Greene says in his book The 48 Laws of Power where he says, "Be wary of friends. They will betray you more quickly, for they are easily aroused to envy. They also become spoiled and tyrannical. But hire a former enemy and he will be more loyal than a friend, because he has more to prove. In fact, you have more to fear from friends than from enemies. If you have no enemies, find a way to make them." - Never Put Too Much Trust in Friends, Learn to Use Enemies (Law Number Two)

What are your thoughts on my two above comments?

Best regards,

Ali

P.S. If you're interested, I recently watched a pretty good video on networking using the "collaborative vs competitive frame" here.

Oh yeah, I love "Start With WHY".

Not just for marketing and marketing oneself, but also for life.
Knowing what you stand for and why you do what you do will just make you feel better about life and about yourself.

Personally, I would recommend you to keep that "why" in your back pocket, but not necessarily to share it at the simplest question such "what do you do".
To begin with, such a complex answer can look pretentious when you're just exchanging quick and basic information. And second, you don't want to share your why with just about anyone.
You "why" is personal, and meaningful. That should be something that people need to earn from you.

Robert Greene is not wrong, but you're still more likely to be cheated and betrayed by strangers or enemies than by a friend, ally, or family member.
Especially if you pick your friends well.

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