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Win-win frame with narcissists and power players?
Hello Lucio,
some power players, among whom narcissists, don't like the idea of win-win. Because of their worldview (their own frame), based in scarcity and low self-esteem, they will analyze power dynamics in a "who's the loser" perspective. Therefore, in some situations, they will look for ways to prevent you to win. If they cannot achieve the win-lose they like so much, they will look for the lose-lose situation, just to make sure you don't win.
What's your opinion about these situations? What is your MO?
I encounter these situations much less than before, but I'm still curious about your opinion on them.
Hey John,
Do you have a concrete example of this?
It's true that some people seek win-lose and some extremely proud -or angry, or disturbed- individuals would rather go lose-lose.
You can see it relatively often in divorces, unluckily, where even children become pawns and collateral damage to hurt the former spouse.
Hello Lucio,
an example would be about 1 year when our colleagues (resident on the same level of hierarchy as me, but 6 months older in the organization) trashed us 4 new colleagues including myself to our bosses. So it made us look bad (for no reason, was 100% a power move) and it made them look like they were trashing us, making all of us look bad.
This might not be the example, though. As I said I didn't experience this kind of dynamics lately. It's more of a general theoretical question.
