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High-value women: examples
A thread with examples of high-value women is helpful to both men and women.
For men, to assess partners, and for women, to provide inspirations to learn from.
This is the first example I could think of.
She is just awesome.
Jade from "Dating in the Dark"
(I watched these with a former lover for both entertainment and material for this website):
High-quality traits
- Feminine
- Brave: shows up
- Honest and upfront, little games: "if it matches up, I'd like to date him"
- Vulnerable: "if he doesn't show up, I'd be a bit disappointed"
- But emotionally strong: in victory or loss, keeps an even keel
- Doesn't hide her dark side (which is not too dark, but common to everyone): "it made me feel a bit better he was gutted"
- But ultimately value-adding, not vindicative: when the nastier presenter, says "good (that he was gutted)", she does not power-scalp on the opportunity to devalue him
- Openly admits her desire to date someone: when the presenter tells her "you'll find someone" (babying), she replies "hopefully yes" (compare to a feminist who'd reply "who needs a man")
- A collaborator, relationship-quality woman: the above also tells you she's a win-win collaborator at heart
Top woman.
Compare with the guy:
- Walks out of fear: The biggest risk for me is denting my ego (but props on his honesty and self-awareness)
- Builds his ego back up with bragging: "then I'll go out and close some more women like I usually do"
The guy was actually alright.
But compared to her, he was put to shame.
She turned out to be too good for him.
Naomi Campbell
Controlling the frame while remaining feminine (bubbly-type of feminine) and maintaining rapport.
It wasn't easy, since Chris Rock was being particularly dim-witted, framing Naomi Campbell -and himself- very negatively, and going back to that negative, value-taking frame over and over.
His most dangerous frames were:
- "you only went after the most successful men"
- "you ended up in abusive relationships" (implied: you allowed them to happen, which might suggest she attracts/creates abuse)
Very, very bad frames. Given the circumstances, she did a good job of minimizing the bad frames, maintaining rapport, moving on, and keeping a good image/status.
Her personality type both made it difficult for her to challenges those frames more strongly, and helped her to minimize them by barrelling ahead and keeping the attention on herself, rather than on him and his dumb frames.
Overall, I think more positive than negative, since addressing those frames more directly and more strongly would have drawn even more attention to them.
I'd personally go a bit less "bubbly", a bit less emotional, and avoid the extremely high pitch she does sometimes.
But it's more personal preferences, she's otherwise a top woman to learn from.
Happy to other opinions as well.
Here is another one, Holly HolmsÂ
I highlighted the part related to the fight:
https://youtu.be/c_N1cOPr59Y?t=402
Some background, the fight:
This interesting:
Does being good at fighting / working as a fighter add value for a woman, or potentially decreases it?
I'm curious to hear from other men here as well.
Thoughts?
She could be a plumber. In this case it’s more about her behavior when she’s winning that matters to me.
To answer your question: to me strength and discipline are qualities. Both for men and women. The only issues are 1. the changes on the body AKA do you like her body type? 2. Being insecure that your woman is stronger than you an can kick your ass. Her husband seems not to be insecure about this as he supports her.
Any other guys sharing some honest opinion on this?
@transitioned , @aliscarlett , @bucktickrammstein18 : a woman who's a professional fighter. Does she lose some points in the dating arena for you, does she gain some, or you don't care?
Very out of practice in the dating arena (thankfully). For me would be case by case.
Pros: likely great body and health oriented, disciplined
Cons: very individualistic occupation will she join 'team us'. I suspect the body adapts to demands - might mean more Testosterone and male behaviour. Possible has high drama requirements/needs the emotional spikes
I'm pretty highly trained myself so if she tried to beat me up that's likely to count as foreplay so no fears there.
Not politically correct but i have read anecdotes of regular guys overpowering female trained fighters just because of being bigger/more upper body strenght, not saying a girl can not kick my ass as i respect even children.
I think if she do something hard: keep feminity high while being a good fighter that would make her very attractive.
Like the hypersexualized female fighter from games like dead or alive or mortal kombat (milena included), for obvious reason somethings harder to find in real life.
It depends on how she views her sport of professional fighting and carries her fighting experience into other areas.
Does she enjoy dominating other people for her gain at their expense in general?
Is it a way of reaching personal excellence and testing her limits?
What does she want to get out of professional fighting?
In general, I would find it attractive.
Being good at professional fighting signifies dedication, discipline, and commitment.
Thank you for sharing, guys!
Still very curious about this, so if anyone has any opinion, please.
Matthew: Is it a way of reaching personal excellence and testing her limits?
What does she want to get out of professional fighting?
In general, I would find it attractive.
Being good at professional fighting signifies dedication, discipline, and commitment.
Interesting.
Yes, it does potentially say something good about her as a person.
Transitioned: I'm pretty highly trained myself so if she tried to beat me up that's likely to count as foreplay so no fears there.
Good one :D
Stef: Not politically correct but i have read anecdotes of regular guys overpowering female trained fighters just because of being bigger/more upper body strenght, not saying a girl can not kick my ass as i respect even children.
Yeah, a bit off-topic, but I think this applies in general. Albeit there is an obviously (probably) strong link between "training in a fighting sport" and "likelihood to win a fight", that link is sometimes overplayed.
The "physical power" argument goes deep though, I think.
As John says above, not being sure they're stronger might cause some men to self-reject, and to lose interest in a woman who trains in fighting.
Stef: I think if she does something hard: keep feminity high while being a good fighter that would make her very attractive.
Yes, I agree, that's the core of the issue to me, it's whether or not she'll lose in femininity.
And that's hard not to do, as you say.
Contact sports might be the most extreme example but, the same can be said for any dogged pursuit. Which is one of the reasons why highly drive career women can have more difficulties in the dating market (not the only reason, though).
