Former Community – We Moved
🆕 Coached community here, for posts & feedback public community here.
My Journey to Power
Hello everyone,
I gave back all the material at the hospital today. I feel like I won: I finished my training and learned a lot. Also in power and social dynamics. I’m very happy to leave this hospital and wish them all the best. Yesterday we had a last meeting with our committee and the attending physicians. It was again the stories of conflict between unit leaders, manipulations during career interviews (it’s supposed to be a career interview and then there are either unhelpful advice, discouragement or intelligence gathering about unit leader's: “this guy does he get along with this guy?”)
There is some progress as now there is a “critical mass” of people wanting and working for a change. However I’m happy to let them all deal with it. The culture can and will change I’m optimistic. It will take 5 to 10 years I estimate though. Great experience all in all. It comforted me in the idea that culture trumps everything. The norms. Just like Lucio you said in the other post. And leaders set the norm. So without a benevolent leadership the norms risk to be value-taking. My boss also told me that it’s a system. He’s right. But who designs it matter just as much.
So as J. Pfeffer said in his book the kind of leader we want is rare. Like really rare. So now I can see the value of benevolent leadership. It’s huge. So this is also encouraging for me to continue on this path. It’s worth it. “Just” have to find the right environment where to apply it.
Now I am also even more convinced that leadership starts with character. Yes you need the technical skills, yes you need the leadership skills, yes you need the power awareness and intelligence. All of that makes you high value as we discussed recently. It does not make you high quality. The high value leader is relatively common. The high quality leader is rare. The high quality high value leader is the rarest of course.
So it’s good. It tells me what to focus on in order to become this person. And hard work. I tried to avoid this as I got tired of all the shenanigans. But there’s no other way.
New beginnings are awaiting…
Quote from John Freeman on April 27, 2023, 12:18 pmSo as J. Pfeffer said in his book the kind of leader we want is rare. Like really rare. So now I can see the value of benevolent leadership. It’s huge. So this is also encouraging for me to continue on this path. It’s worth it. “Just” have to find the right environment where to apply it.
Now I am also even more convinced that leadership starts with character. Yes you need the technical skills, yes you need the leadership skills, yes you need the power awareness and intelligence. All of that makes you high value as we discussed recently. It does not make you high quality. The high value leader is relatively common. The high quality leader is rare. The high quality high value leader is the rarest of course.
Yes, 100%.
Character adds a whole higher "gear" to leadership.
Without character, you'll lose some good people along the way -either they'll quit, or they'll "check out" and do (far) less than their best-.
With character, you'll get the most out of the best people, and attract even more.
Thank you Lucio!
This morning I woke up and realized something. My life is good. I have made mistakes in the past and will make others and it’s ok. It does not make me a bad person. I may not have had the best parents and it’s ok. Self-esteem is the fundamental I was looking for to improve. Listening to these books I can see it’s working. I’m going to invest more to improve it.
I’m now in an interesting period of positive nihilism/cynicism. I feel freer than I ever felt. That is I don’t have so many expectations with life. I feel more detached. So I now feel more free to choose the life and actions that I want.
That being said I reflected how I could achieve what I achieved in the past. I’m not boasting here the truth is that when I think about it I’m sincerely wondering how I could achieve what I did in the past. Now I feel less driven than during that period. I now have more comfort so less drive to push hard. My drive is actually like many people with a steady job to increase my comfort. However there is no growth nor purpose in comfort. So I’m introspecting to find how to find this drive again. I wrote my goals and it’s helping.
I think what gave me this enormous drive where a few things that I’m sharing here:
The dream: I had the dream to become a bioengineer. I had the dream to relieve the pain and suffering of children. So I need to find a new dream.
The pain: I would not let myself fail or give up because I was the only person who could give myself what I wanted. I had little to no emotional support. So it was a matter of psychological survival: I had to win. It was also coming from the anger of having not had been given the best chances at the start. So I had a form of « rage » that was keeping me going. Now that I feel more at peace with myself have a professional situation, friends and stable income I do not feel such emotions.
I still want to develop my potential in terms of self development/professional/social. It all starts with a new dream that I’m looking for.
Edit: I also appreciate more being by myself so I don’t feel like I need other people or women so much. So it is also quite empowering on the personal level.
Hello everyone,
I started my first week as an attending physician. It’s exciting, I’m in a leadership position and rewarding. I spend less time with the patients and more with the team. It’s about empowering resident physicians who are beginners. Teaching, leading, supporting. All things I love.
I came here to say that I’m most probably will less able to get on the forum. As a member of this community I feel like I owe it to you to inform you.
There is (again) an overload of work since I’m working at the hospital. So I have to focus hard on the challenges at hand. My dating life is going back on the back burner as well unfortunately. I’ll have to be very efficient with my time that’s for sure.
I also want to tell you that I’m happy so far in this new role and I’m grateful for all the support and help so far from you guys.
I’ll do my best to come here when possible. It’s going to be a challenging year to say the least.
Sincerely,
John
Hi John, congratulations on your new position.
I’m happy to read that you are enjoying it so far.
It’s always nice to see you on the forum, even if you’re gonna have less time in the future.
Nice, rock on John, happy to read the new place seems already a lot better and you love your job.
Onward and upward!
And about the forum, there's no pressure here, it'll always be good to reading from you whether once a week or once a month, and you're a legend of TPM anyway :)
Thank you very much Jack and Lucio for the kind words!
Hey John,
congratulations for your new role.
I hope you'll continue to be and write here and that we'll still be able to keep exchanging ideas and support.
Thank you very much Bel! We will! I'm still here and part of the gang :)
