New PU Sales Page (feedback?)
Quote from John Freeman on June 29, 2022, 10:46 pmMy raw feed-back (haven't read the other answers):
Negative:
- The first page lacks clarity, it's not clear what page are we on? It's a university ok, but what will it do for me? It's a bit too vague I would be more descriptive and put a USP there with the definition: "(insert definition). Power gets you what you want. But how do you get Power? This is what Power University will teach you. I would also put an example: "Power is what gets you mate, money and success" or Examples of powerful people: ...." how to become like them?
- I don't understand why there are brands below. What is the connection with PU and why are they at this moment? I want to become more powerful I don't care about brands.
- I would put the testimonies higher, maybe put them in-between another category (example: one before Lucio, one after)
- It's not clear (on my system) that you can scroll down and that there is more content below
- Why the brain as an image? I don't understand the connection
Positive
- It's good to put video testimonies. I would maybe only keep the 3 videos one + a woman. It's better 4 strong testimonies than a bunch. We don't know which one to read.
- It's good to have a free trial with the buy. But I'm not going to do a free trial/buy on a product I don't know what it's all about. So I would put it after the content has been described.
- If I would have read this one, I would have not buy the course honestly, to me there are a lot of buzz word but it's difficult to read for me:
The new system for social skills.
Similar to how psychology applies scientific principles to the human mind, power dynamics applies scientific principles to social and life success.
Before self-development courses and real-life coaching first started addressing social skills, books and individuals’ trial and error were the only ways to improve.
Power dynamics is a groundbreaking approach to advanced social skills that’s currently at a similar inflection point. The barrier to entry is large but the early adopters who start now will be years ahead of the competition.
It's not clear to me, another proposition (landing page):
Power University
Power (with dictionary fonts, like it comes from a dictionary)
- The ability to get what someone wants
- The ability to influence other people's behaviour
Leonardo di Caprio, Elon Musk, Steve Jobs are all powerful people.
But how to acquire power? This is what Power University is going to teach you.
Power University is based on scientific research, mixed with personal experience from the founder, Lucio Buffalmano, gathered over more than 10 years (I don't know the number).
Lucio Buffalmano is the recipient of a social psychology degree from La Sapienza University. Based on his training, experience and literature review, he designed a course that is like no other (see testimonies: link).
Most self-development books have some content but don't teach you how to apply it. Power University will do that through lessons, examples and exercises.
Most self-development books are based on personal opinion. Power University is based on science.
Most self-development books are based on ideology. Power University is based on practicality and "what works".
Power University gives you access to a community of students working hard to become more powerful. So you can learn from them and share your experiences with them.
But why get Power? Human are social animals, so social skills are a key foundation of being part of a small minority of powerful people. Power University will also teach you social skills, albeit they are not the core of the curriculum.
Power Dynamics relate to who's the individual that exerts the most influence on the others. Power Dynamics relate to who's in demand and who's not.
Would you like to learn how to become someone who's in demand and can influence others?
If you are someone who's smart, driven and has been frustrated because you did not get the social success you think you deserve:
Start your free trial
After that I would put testimonies, Lucio's bio and a link to the forum.
So basically I would work on the clarity + brevity + centre the message on the reader's need and profile: self-development nerds, smart, driven people.
Us basically.
I hope this is helpful.
My raw feed-back (haven't read the other answers):
Negative:
- The first page lacks clarity, it's not clear what page are we on? It's a university ok, but what will it do for me? It's a bit too vague I would be more descriptive and put a USP there with the definition: "(insert definition). Power gets you what you want. But how do you get Power? This is what Power University will teach you. I would also put an example: "Power is what gets you mate, money and success" or Examples of powerful people: ...." how to become like them?
- I don't understand why there are brands below. What is the connection with PU and why are they at this moment? I want to become more powerful I don't care about brands.
- I would put the testimonies higher, maybe put them in-between another category (example: one before Lucio, one after)
- It's not clear (on my system) that you can scroll down and that there is more content below
- Why the brain as an image? I don't understand the connection
Positive
- It's good to put video testimonies. I would maybe only keep the 3 videos one + a woman. It's better 4 strong testimonies than a bunch. We don't know which one to read.
- It's good to have a free trial with the buy. But I'm not going to do a free trial/buy on a product I don't know what it's all about. So I would put it after the content has been described.
- If I would have read this one, I would have not buy the course honestly, to me there are a lot of buzz word but it's difficult to read for me:
The new system for social skills.
Similar to how psychology applies scientific principles to the human mind, power dynamics applies scientific principles to social and life success.
Before self-development courses and real-life coaching first started addressing social skills, books and individuals’ trial and error were the only ways to improve.
Power dynamics is a groundbreaking approach to advanced social skills that’s currently at a similar inflection point. The barrier to entry is large but the early adopters who start now will be years ahead of the competition.
It's not clear to me, another proposition (landing page):
Power University
Power (with dictionary fonts, like it comes from a dictionary)
- The ability to get what someone wants
- The ability to influence other people's behaviour
Leonardo di Caprio, Elon Musk, Steve Jobs are all powerful people.
But how to acquire power? This is what Power University is going to teach you.
Power University is based on scientific research, mixed with personal experience from the founder, Lucio Buffalmano, gathered over more than 10 years (I don't know the number).
Lucio Buffalmano is the recipient of a social psychology degree from La Sapienza University. Based on his training, experience and literature review, he designed a course that is like no other (see testimonies: link).
Most self-development books have some content but don't teach you how to apply it. Power University will do that through lessons, examples and exercises.
Most self-development books are based on personal opinion. Power University is based on science.
Most self-development books are based on ideology. Power University is based on practicality and "what works".
Power University gives you access to a community of students working hard to become more powerful. So you can learn from them and share your experiences with them.
But why get Power? Human are social animals, so social skills are a key foundation of being part of a small minority of powerful people. Power University will also teach you social skills, albeit they are not the core of the curriculum.
Power Dynamics relate to who's the individual that exerts the most influence on the others. Power Dynamics relate to who's in demand and who's not.
Would you like to learn how to become someone who's in demand and can influence others?
If you are someone who's smart, driven and has been frustrated because you did not get the social success you think you deserve:
Start your free trial
After that I would put testimonies, Lucio's bio and a link to the forum.
So basically I would work on the clarity + brevity + centre the message on the reader's need and profile: self-development nerds, smart, driven people.
Us basically.
I hope this is helpful.
Quote from Lucio Buffalmano on June 30, 2022, 8:08 amThis awesome, awesome feedback John, thank you so much!
In brief, this new page is molded from this neuromarketing salespage.
The idea is that the way they introduce neuromarketing is similar to how Power University could be introduced: a groundbreaking new approach that is still developing, but that will still put you ahead of the game if you start it now.
A few notes:
Quote from John Freeman on June 29, 2022, 10:46 pmNegative:
- Why the brain as an image? I don't understand the connection
Gread feedback.
That was inherited from the original page it's being molded from.
Wasn't sure whether to replace it or not, but now that you write that, I'm inching towards replacing it.
So right now I'm thinking:
- Throne
- Scepter
- Olympus / something that resembles God mythology
- Eagle (obviously)
- Current TPM's eagle (but not sure how the gold will look like)
- Current TPM's eagle (but in line shapes, like the current brain)
Quote from John Freeman on June 29, 2022, 10:46 pm
- I don't understand why there are brands below. What is the connection with PU and why are they at this moment? I want to become more powerful I don't care about brands.
Also from the original template.
Many people do put brands in the landing page to showcase those who have done business with and/or that have endorsed them or used the service already as a way to increase authority.
Charisma University for example has it on their checkout page:
I'm personally not a fan of it either though, so I remove it.
Quote from John Freeman on June 29, 2022, 10:46 pmIt's not clear to me, another proposition (landing page):
Power University
Power (with dictionary fonts, like it comes from a dictionary)
- The ability to get what someone wants
- The ability to influence other people's behaviour
Leonardo di Caprio, Elon Musk, Steve Jobs are all powerful people.
But how to acquire power? This is what Power University is going to teach you.
Power University is based on scientific research, mixed with personal experience from the founder, Lucio Buffalmano, gathered over more than 10 years (I don't know the number).
Lucio Buffalmano is the recipient of a social psychology degree from La Sapienza University. Based on his training, experience and literature review, he designed a course that is like no other (see testimonies: link).
Most self-development books have some content but don't teach you how to apply it. Power University will do that through lessons, examples and exercises.
Most self-development books are based on personal opinion. Power University is based on science.
Most self-development books are based on ideology. Power University is based on practicality and "what works".
Power University gives you access to a community of students working hard to become more powerful. So you can learn from them and share your experiences with them.
But why get Power? Human are social animals, so social skills are a key foundation of being part of a small minority of powerful people. Power University will also teach you social skills, albeit they are not the core of the curriculum.
Power Dynamics relate to who's the individual that exerts the most influence on the others. Power Dynamics relate to who's in demand and who's not.
Would you like to learn how to become someone who's in demand and can influence others?
If you are someone who's smart, driven and has been frustrated because you did not get the social success you think you deserve:
Start your free trial
I like this a lot.
There's a rationale why the page does not discuss power much.
And that's because the goal is to appeal -and make it easier- to brand new visitors. So it downplays the "power" element and pitches it instead as an advanced/novel approach to social skills.
However, I also agree with you: the name "power" is there, so I'm thinking it might make sense to define and provide a rationale on why it's important.
This awesome, awesome feedback John, thank you so much!
In brief, this new page is molded from this neuromarketing salespage.
The idea is that the way they introduce neuromarketing is similar to how Power University could be introduced: a groundbreaking new approach that is still developing, but that will still put you ahead of the game if you start it now.
A few notes:
Quote from John Freeman on June 29, 2022, 10:46 pmNegative:
- Why the brain as an image? I don't understand the connection
Gread feedback.
That was inherited from the original page it's being molded from.
Wasn't sure whether to replace it or not, but now that you write that, I'm inching towards replacing it.
So right now I'm thinking:
- Throne
- Scepter
- Olympus / something that resembles God mythology
- Eagle (obviously)
- Current TPM's eagle (but not sure how the gold will look like)
- Current TPM's eagle (but in line shapes, like the current brain)
Quote from John Freeman on June 29, 2022, 10:46 pm
- I don't understand why there are brands below. What is the connection with PU and why are they at this moment? I want to become more powerful I don't care about brands.
Also from the original template.
Many people do put brands in the landing page to showcase those who have done business with and/or that have endorsed them or used the service already as a way to increase authority.
Charisma University for example has it on their checkout page:
I'm personally not a fan of it either though, so I remove it.
Quote from John Freeman on June 29, 2022, 10:46 pmIt's not clear to me, another proposition (landing page):
Power University
Power (with dictionary fonts, like it comes from a dictionary)
- The ability to get what someone wants
- The ability to influence other people's behaviour
Leonardo di Caprio, Elon Musk, Steve Jobs are all powerful people.
But how to acquire power? This is what Power University is going to teach you.
Power University is based on scientific research, mixed with personal experience from the founder, Lucio Buffalmano, gathered over more than 10 years (I don't know the number).
Lucio Buffalmano is the recipient of a social psychology degree from La Sapienza University. Based on his training, experience and literature review, he designed a course that is like no other (see testimonies: link).
Most self-development books have some content but don't teach you how to apply it. Power University will do that through lessons, examples and exercises.
Most self-development books are based on personal opinion. Power University is based on science.
Most self-development books are based on ideology. Power University is based on practicality and "what works".
Power University gives you access to a community of students working hard to become more powerful. So you can learn from them and share your experiences with them.
But why get Power? Human are social animals, so social skills are a key foundation of being part of a small minority of powerful people. Power University will also teach you social skills, albeit they are not the core of the curriculum.
Power Dynamics relate to who's the individual that exerts the most influence on the others. Power Dynamics relate to who's in demand and who's not.
Would you like to learn how to become someone who's in demand and can influence others?
If you are someone who's smart, driven and has been frustrated because you did not get the social success you think you deserve:
Start your free trial
I like this a lot.
There's a rationale why the page does not discuss power much.
And that's because the goal is to appeal -and make it easier- to brand new visitors. So it downplays the "power" element and pitches it instead as an advanced/novel approach to social skills.
However, I also agree with you: the name "power" is there, so I'm thinking it might make sense to define and provide a rationale on why it's important.
---
(Book a call) for personalized & private feedback
Quote from John Freeman on June 30, 2022, 8:34 amSince you liked it, more is coming 🙂
(meta: for training purposes, "more is coming", based on your feed-back)
Since you liked it, more is coming 🙂
(meta: for training purposes, "more is coming", based on your feed-back)
Quote from John Freeman on June 30, 2022, 9:43 pm
- Throne
- Scepter
- Olympus / something that resembles God mythology
- Eagle (obviously)
- Current TPM's eagle (but not sure how the gold will look like)
- Current TPM's eagle (but in line shapes, like the current brain)
Here it's a matter of taste I think. Here is what I mean: the eagle has a particular symbolic that is understood by the insiders. I'm not sure everyone has this image in their mind. If you want to use it, I would explain something like this on the page to explain the symbol.
Most people behave like turkey: they think small, they act petty, they talk behind people's back, they try to look better by pushing other people's down. Other people are like eagles: they think big, they act magnanoumsly, they are assertive, they pull people up. Who do you want to be? (or Do you want to be an eagle or a turkey?)
Otherwise I would use the awesome image found by Ali with the chess pieces for the social strategist book: it is a powerful imagery that evokes mental power and strategy.
And that's because the goal is to appeal -and make it easier- to brand new visitors. So it downplays the "power" element and pitches it instead as an advanced/novel approach to social skills.
I totally understand. As a customer, what draw me to your site was the "Social Power" because I felt socially powerless too many times. So I would maybe mix the explanation with social power and/or social skills, something like this, and addressing the elephant in the room:
Power has a bad rep. When people think about people who seek power, they think about Hitler, Mussolini and Staline. However, there are two kinds of power: personal power and social power. The influence you have over yourself and others. This influence can be positive. On TPM we recommend a positive, value-adding use of Power. Gandhi was powerful, Mother Teresa was powerful.
Maybe not using religious examples but you get the point. I would address it that there is positive and negative power. And here it's about positive power. You see the gist of it.
- Throne
- Scepter
- Olympus / something that resembles God mythology
- Eagle (obviously)
- Current TPM's eagle (but not sure how the gold will look like)
- Current TPM's eagle (but in line shapes, like the current brain)
Here it's a matter of taste I think. Here is what I mean: the eagle has a particular symbolic that is understood by the insiders. I'm not sure everyone has this image in their mind. If you want to use it, I would explain something like this on the page to explain the symbol.
Most people behave like turkey: they think small, they act petty, they talk behind people's back, they try to look better by pushing other people's down. Other people are like eagles: they think big, they act magnanoumsly, they are assertive, they pull people up. Who do you want to be? (or Do you want to be an eagle or a turkey?)
Otherwise I would use the awesome image found by Ali with the chess pieces for the social strategist book: it is a powerful imagery that evokes mental power and strategy.
And that's because the goal is to appeal -and make it easier- to brand new visitors. So it downplays the "power" element and pitches it instead as an advanced/novel approach to social skills.
I totally understand. As a customer, what draw me to your site was the "Social Power" because I felt socially powerless too many times. So I would maybe mix the explanation with social power and/or social skills, something like this, and addressing the elephant in the room:
Power has a bad rep. When people think about people who seek power, they think about Hitler, Mussolini and Staline. However, there are two kinds of power: personal power and social power. The influence you have over yourself and others. This influence can be positive. On TPM we recommend a positive, value-adding use of Power. Gandhi was powerful, Mother Teresa was powerful.
Maybe not using religious examples but you get the point. I would address it that there is positive and negative power. And here it's about positive power. You see the gist of it.
Quote from Lucio Buffalmano on July 3, 2022, 10:15 amThank you so much, John!
Really, really great feedback (and took me some time to get back to it as I always take more time to digest great content).
Thank you so much, John!
Really, really great feedback (and took me some time to get back to it as I always take more time to digest great content).
---
(Book a call) for personalized & private feedback
Quote from Ali Scarlett on July 7, 2022, 7:07 pmBuilding on some of John's feedback:
Quote from John Freeman on June 29, 2022, 10:46 pmNegative:
- I don't understand why there are brands below. What is the connection with PU and why are they at this moment? I want to become more powerful I don't care about brands.
Yeah, it's not a requirement for an effective sales page, but I think it's a good form of authority-endorsing sometimes.
I'd personally use the "as seen in" logos from the homepage.
Quote from John Freeman on June 29, 2022, 10:46 pm(...)
...another proposition (landing page):
Power University
Power (with dictionary fonts, like it comes from a dictionary)
- The ability to get what someone wants
- The ability to influence other people's behaviour
Leonardo di Caprio, Elon Musk, Steve Jobs are all powerful people.
But how to acquire power? This is what Power University is going to teach you.
Power University is based on scientific research, mixed with personal experience from the founder, Lucio Buffalmano, gathered over more than 10 years (I don't know the number).
Lucio Buffalmano is the recipient of a social psychology degree from La Sapienza University. Based on his training, experience and literature review, he designed a course that is like no other (see testimonies: link).
Most self-development books have some content but don't teach you how to apply it. Power University will do that through lessons, examples and exercises.
Most self-development books are based on personal opinion. Power University is based on science.
Most self-development books are based on ideology. Power University is based on practicality and "what works".
Power University gives you access to a community of students working hard to become more powerful. So you can learn from them and share your experiences with them.
But why get Power? Human are social animals, so social skills are a key foundation of being part of a small minority of powerful people. Power University will also teach you social skills, albeit they are not the core of the curriculum.
Power Dynamics relate to who's the individual that exerts the most influence on the others. Power Dynamics relate to who's in demand and who's not.
Would you like to learn how to become someone who's in demand and can influence others?
If you are someone who's smart, driven and has been frustrated because you did not get the social success you think you deserve:
Start your free trial
On this part:
Leonardo di Caprio, Elon Musk, Steve Jobs are all powerful people.
I made a suggestion a while back that's similar to this:
Quote from Ali Scarlett on July 25, 2021, 2:50 amProvide A Concrete Mental Image Through PU's Sales Copy
"Not surprisingly, images generate a larger emotional impact than words (Hinojosa et al., 2009). To increase the persuasiveness of your content, you should transform important written content into a mental image."
Here are a couple of ways:
Use metaphors to convey intangible concepts
"…life insurance companies use ideas associated with various symbols such as umbrellas (Travelers), rocks (Prudential Insurance Company), and hands (Allstate)
to convey qualities of protection, sturdiness, and support” (Zaltman, 2008, p. 35)."Kolenda's example:
- Poor: Our app is very powerful.
- Good: Our app has Zeus-like power.
And, given that one thing we talk about here is avoiding losing status to the value-takers, turkeys, negative social climbers and so on, there's opportunity for conveying "power" with a mental image in PU's sales page:
Current Copy: "Power University gives you the tools to achieve life success (hard to imagine what Lucio means by "life success", especially since, as a prospect, his definition could be different from yours)."
Optional Revision: "Power University gives you the tools to achieve celebrity-like power (easy to imagine a celebrity and then imagine what they're capable of achieving with their influence, freedom, etc.)."
However, given that this new sales page is headed in a different direction, I'm not sure that this feedback still applies.
Quote from John Freeman on June 30, 2022, 9:43 pm
- Throne
- Scepter
- Olympus / something that resembles God mythology
- Eagle (obviously)
- Current TPM's eagle (but not sure how the gold will look like)
- Current TPM's eagle (but in line shapes, like the current brain)
Here it's a matter of taste I think. Here is what I mean: the eagle has a particular symbolic that is understood by the insiders. I'm not sure everyone has this image in their mind. If you want to use it, I would explain something like this on the page to explain the symbol.
(...)
Otherwise I would use the awesome image found by Ali with the chess pieces for the social strategist book: it is a powerful imagery that evokes mental power and strategy.
Love this!
When I saw the brain for the neuromarketing course, it made sense from a neuroscience perspective.
So, I was giving some thought to possibilities that would apply to a social skills course. (Maybe a person talking or some sort of diagram of two heads facing each other?)
However, due to the mere exposure effect (i.e. the "familiarity principle"), being exposed to familiar information repeatedly causes us to develop a liking for that information because it's more familiar (which feels good due to processing fluency).
Therefore, repeatedly using the chess pieces imagery can help influence visitors to like the sales page more (and the idea of reading it).
Plus, it simply aligns well with highlighting PU's "power" in sharing social strategy (if you'll allow me that pun :).
Now, continuing my feedback:
#5.2. Taught by the Founder of The Power Dynamics Institute
Holds a master’s degree from La Sapienza, department of communication and sociological research, is a member of the American Psychology Association (APA), and dedicates his life to researching, uncovering, testing, and refining the most effective social strategies and techniques.
This describes what Lucio does without underlining the point of what he does very well, in my opinion.
...and dedicates his life to researching, uncovering, testing, and refining the most effective strategies and techniques for social success.
This, on the other hand, seems to do more in terms of underlining what Lucio does and tying that expertise into how it's valuable to the reader.
But, then they went further, refining some of those concepts, and then coming up with brand new ones as well as strategies, techniques, and approaches validated by real-life testing and Lucio’s expertise as a social scientist.
Addressing people by last name first conveys more authority and keeps communication more formal (as is done in nonfiction books and articles around the TPM website).
See here:
But, then they went further, refining some of those concepts, and then coming up with brand new ones as well as strategies, techniques, and approaches validated by real-life testing and Buffalmano's expertise as a social scientist.
#6.2. What Is Your Advanced Resource to Win With People?
I'd change the image of a clock (which is about saving time) to an image of multiple large stacks of numerous academic books (which is more congruent with the current content regarding "cutting the line").
On the bar below:
SEE THE WELCOME LESSON
The preview lesson is open to peek into Power University
Learn More ➔
START NOW
Don’t waste any more time and get down to it.
Learn More ➔
The "Start Now" has the call-to-action of "get down to it".
But, the "See the Welcome Lesson" is only a comment on what's there, not a direction to go there.
So, better might be:
SEE THE WELCOME LESSON
Take a peek inside the preview lesson for Power University
Learn More ➔
#7.2. Read What Power University Alumni Say
The periods for the one-liners below the video testimonials would be more punctually correct if the periods were inside of the quotation marks.
#9.2. The Promise of Power University
The current copy:
You will develop an extensive understanding of the crucial power principles that underpin social and life success, be it in socializing and making friends, dating and attracting mates, workplaces and winning promotions, etc. Etc.
Most of all, you will learn how to apply proven strategies and techniques to win and achieve goals.
Our mindsets, strategies and techniques ensure that you will improve your effectiveness and get better, real-life benefits and results in socializing, dating, relationships, leadership, communication, negotiation, persuasion, sales… And anything people-related (or anything that requires strategic thinking).
We can make big promises because for one reason:
We provided the results to back them up.
Over and over.
Another idea:
You will develop an extensive understanding of the crucial principles that underpin social and life success.
Our mindsets, strategies and techniques ensure that you will improve your effectiveness and get above average benefits and better results in socializing, dating, relationships, leadership, communication, negotiation, persuasion, sales… and anything people-related (or anything that requires strategic thinking).
We can make big promises because, for one reason:
We provide the results to back them up.
Again and again.
Here are my thoughts.
You will develop an extensive understanding of the crucial principles that underpin social and life success.
Here, we avoid saying "power principles" for similar reasons as before.
And, we remove the content between here and the "our mindsets" because, at this point in the sales page, it's considered "excess" information (at least, to me).
Better, might be to keep it short and sweet, not only to avoid confusing the reader with more information than they need or reiterating what's already been said, but to keep the sales page as minimal as possible so readers can focus on what's most important: the buying decision.
Maybe testing will prove that these sentences are actually necessary, in which case, by all means, add it back. But, for right now, it seems to be more than what's needed for the smart, driven people who would be reading around TPM anyway (especially with the "Curriculum" section being so detailed already regarding what future PU students will walk away with).
Our mindsets, strategies and techniques ensure that you will improve your effectiveness and get above average benefits and better results in socializing, dating, relationships, leadership, communication, negotiation, persuasion, sales… and anything people-related (or anything that requires strategic thinking).
The previous copy said, "...you will improve your effectiveness and get better, real-life benefits and results...".
However, saying that they'll get "real-life" benefits partially implies that the results they're currently getting aren't "real" which banks the new question, "Well, if the results I'm getting aren't something you consider 'real', then what do you consider a 'real' result and what are you actually planning to teach me in PU then?"
It's a phrasing that can raise more questions.
However, saying "above average benefits" and "better results" appeals to those who are driven and are already seeing some results (likely because, as PU recommends, they already have a minimum level of emotional intelligence and social skills) and are simply looking to take a step further to the next level.
We can make big promises because, for one reason:
We provide the results to back them up.
In my opinion, there's no reason this word should be in past-tense.
PU still continues to provide positive results for its students, new, past, and present.
And, it would be a mistake to imply otherwise.
Again and again.
A small thing, but "over and over" is a saying that ends on "again".
Therefore, the primary focus of the sentence is on the "again" and the reader, as a result, may have more processing fluency/favorability for this form of phrasing.
#10. Power University™ Tuition
Periods are needed at the end of these sentences.
#11. More Than Learning, It’s Training For Life
In this title, "Learning" and "Training" sound too synonymous to me here.
Almost like saying, "More than studying, it's education for life."
That sounds fine, but better might be:
More Than a Course, It’s Training For Life
You can use the title to differentiate PU as a course that's above the competition.
This way, the content that falls under the title is also more persuasive.
And, speaking of:
Power University’s curriculum is built to be the most effective to internalize the mindsets, strategies, and techniques until they become second nature.
Without the persuasive wording, at its core, this sentence roughly translates directly to:
Power University is built [with the purpose] to [help you] internalize mindsets, strategies, and techniques.
This sentence makes it sound like PU is built to internalize concepts.
And, I disagree.
The curriculum is built to deliver groundbreaking teachings. The ease of internalization is a side benefit of PU and its constant development that makes it special and separates it from the competition. But, ease of internalization is NOT PU's primary focus (it's not what it was built for).
First and foremost, PU was built to provide teachings because one must crawl before they walk. One must learn before they internalize.
Therefore, PU (and its curriculum) were built primarily to help people learn as a first priority. Then, the internalization comes next.
That said, the internalization should still be shared (and can even be framed as a great added benefit that not all other courses offer), while avoiding any wording that might suggest PU was built to internalize at the expense of everything else PU can actually do for others (such as first learning the groundbreaking strategies and techniques they don't already know, something that might be more important to the reader).
So, rather than use the word "to", say, "for" instead:
Power University’s curriculum is built to be the most effective for internalizing the mindsets, strategies, and techniques that achieve your social goals until they become second nature.
Feel free to disagree with any of the above.
Maybe I'll do a teardown of the FAQs section next.
Building on some of John's feedback:
Quote from John Freeman on June 29, 2022, 10:46 pmNegative:
- I don't understand why there are brands below. What is the connection with PU and why are they at this moment? I want to become more powerful I don't care about brands.
Yeah, it's not a requirement for an effective sales page, but I think it's a good form of authority-endorsing sometimes.
I'd personally use the "as seen in" logos from the homepage.
Quote from John Freeman on June 29, 2022, 10:46 pm(...)
...another proposition (landing page):
Power University
Power (with dictionary fonts, like it comes from a dictionary)
- The ability to get what someone wants
- The ability to influence other people's behaviour
Leonardo di Caprio, Elon Musk, Steve Jobs are all powerful people.
But how to acquire power? This is what Power University is going to teach you.
Power University is based on scientific research, mixed with personal experience from the founder, Lucio Buffalmano, gathered over more than 10 years (I don't know the number).
Lucio Buffalmano is the recipient of a social psychology degree from La Sapienza University. Based on his training, experience and literature review, he designed a course that is like no other (see testimonies: link).
Most self-development books have some content but don't teach you how to apply it. Power University will do that through lessons, examples and exercises.
Most self-development books are based on personal opinion. Power University is based on science.
Most self-development books are based on ideology. Power University is based on practicality and "what works".
Power University gives you access to a community of students working hard to become more powerful. So you can learn from them and share your experiences with them.
But why get Power? Human are social animals, so social skills are a key foundation of being part of a small minority of powerful people. Power University will also teach you social skills, albeit they are not the core of the curriculum.
Power Dynamics relate to who's the individual that exerts the most influence on the others. Power Dynamics relate to who's in demand and who's not.
Would you like to learn how to become someone who's in demand and can influence others?
If you are someone who's smart, driven and has been frustrated because you did not get the social success you think you deserve:
Start your free trial
On this part:
Leonardo di Caprio, Elon Musk, Steve Jobs are all powerful people.
I made a suggestion a while back that's similar to this:
Quote from Ali Scarlett on July 25, 2021, 2:50 amProvide A Concrete Mental Image Through PU's Sales Copy
"Not surprisingly, images generate a larger emotional impact than words (Hinojosa et al., 2009). To increase the persuasiveness of your content, you should transform important written content into a mental image."
Here are a couple of ways:
Use metaphors to convey intangible concepts
"…life insurance companies use ideas associated with various symbols such as umbrellas (Travelers), rocks (Prudential Insurance Company), and hands (Allstate)
to convey qualities of protection, sturdiness, and support” (Zaltman, 2008, p. 35)."Kolenda's example:
- Poor: Our app is very powerful.
- Good: Our app has Zeus-like power.
And, given that one thing we talk about here is avoiding losing status to the value-takers, turkeys, negative social climbers and so on, there's opportunity for conveying "power" with a mental image in PU's sales page:
Current Copy: "Power University gives you the tools to achieve life success (hard to imagine what Lucio means by "life success", especially since, as a prospect, his definition could be different from yours)."
Optional Revision: "Power University gives you the tools to achieve celebrity-like power (easy to imagine a celebrity and then imagine what they're capable of achieving with their influence, freedom, etc.)."
However, given that this new sales page is headed in a different direction, I'm not sure that this feedback still applies.
Quote from John Freeman on June 30, 2022, 9:43 pm
- Throne
- Scepter
- Olympus / something that resembles God mythology
- Eagle (obviously)
- Current TPM's eagle (but not sure how the gold will look like)
- Current TPM's eagle (but in line shapes, like the current brain)
Here it's a matter of taste I think. Here is what I mean: the eagle has a particular symbolic that is understood by the insiders. I'm not sure everyone has this image in their mind. If you want to use it, I would explain something like this on the page to explain the symbol.
(...)
Otherwise I would use the awesome image found by Ali with the chess pieces for the social strategist book: it is a powerful imagery that evokes mental power and strategy.
Love this!
When I saw the brain for the neuromarketing course, it made sense from a neuroscience perspective.
So, I was giving some thought to possibilities that would apply to a social skills course. (Maybe a person talking or some sort of diagram of two heads facing each other?)
However, due to the mere exposure effect (i.e. the "familiarity principle"), being exposed to familiar information repeatedly causes us to develop a liking for that information because it's more familiar (which feels good due to processing fluency).
Therefore, repeatedly using the chess pieces imagery can help influence visitors to like the sales page more (and the idea of reading it).
Plus, it simply aligns well with highlighting PU's "power" in sharing social strategy (if you'll allow me that pun :).
Now, continuing my feedback:
#5.2. Taught by the Founder of The Power Dynamics Institute
Holds a master’s degree from La Sapienza, department of communication and sociological research, is a member of the American Psychology Association (APA), and dedicates his life to researching, uncovering, testing, and refining the most effective social strategies and techniques.
This describes what Lucio does without underlining the point of what he does very well, in my opinion.
...and dedicates his life to researching, uncovering, testing, and refining the most effective strategies and techniques for social success.
This, on the other hand, seems to do more in terms of underlining what Lucio does and tying that expertise into how it's valuable to the reader.
But, then they went further, refining some of those concepts, and then coming up with brand new ones as well as strategies, techniques, and approaches validated by real-life testing and Lucio’s expertise as a social scientist.
Addressing people by last name first conveys more authority and keeps communication more formal (as is done in nonfiction books and articles around the TPM website).
See here:
But, then they went further, refining some of those concepts, and then coming up with brand new ones as well as strategies, techniques, and approaches validated by real-life testing and Buffalmano's expertise as a social scientist.
#6.2. What Is Your Advanced Resource to Win With People?
I'd change the image of a clock (which is about saving time) to an image of multiple large stacks of numerous academic books (which is more congruent with the current content regarding "cutting the line").
On the bar below:
SEE THE WELCOME LESSON
The preview lesson is open to peek into Power University
Learn More ➔
START NOW
Don’t waste any more time and get down to it.
Learn More ➔
The "Start Now" has the call-to-action of "get down to it".
But, the "See the Welcome Lesson" is only a comment on what's there, not a direction to go there.
So, better might be:
SEE THE WELCOME LESSON
Take a peek inside the preview lesson for Power University
Learn More ➔
#7.2. Read What Power University Alumni Say
The periods for the one-liners below the video testimonials would be more punctually correct if the periods were inside of the quotation marks.
#9.2. The Promise of Power University
The current copy:
You will develop an extensive understanding of the crucial power principles that underpin social and life success, be it in socializing and making friends, dating and attracting mates, workplaces and winning promotions, etc. Etc.
Most of all, you will learn how to apply proven strategies and techniques to win and achieve goals.
Our mindsets, strategies and techniques ensure that you will improve your effectiveness and get better, real-life benefits and results in socializing, dating, relationships, leadership, communication, negotiation, persuasion, sales… And anything people-related (or anything that requires strategic thinking).
We can make big promises because for one reason:
We provided the results to back them up.
Over and over.
Another idea:
You will develop an extensive understanding of the crucial principles that underpin social and life success.
Our mindsets, strategies and techniques ensure that you will improve your effectiveness and get above average benefits and better results in socializing, dating, relationships, leadership, communication, negotiation, persuasion, sales… and anything people-related (or anything that requires strategic thinking).
We can make big promises because, for one reason:
We provide the results to back them up.
Again and again.
Here are my thoughts.
You will develop an extensive understanding of the crucial principles that underpin social and life success.
Here, we avoid saying "power principles" for similar reasons as before.
And, we remove the content between here and the "our mindsets" because, at this point in the sales page, it's considered "excess" information (at least, to me).
Better, might be to keep it short and sweet, not only to avoid confusing the reader with more information than they need or reiterating what's already been said, but to keep the sales page as minimal as possible so readers can focus on what's most important: the buying decision.
Maybe testing will prove that these sentences are actually necessary, in which case, by all means, add it back. But, for right now, it seems to be more than what's needed for the smart, driven people who would be reading around TPM anyway (especially with the "Curriculum" section being so detailed already regarding what future PU students will walk away with).
Our mindsets, strategies and techniques ensure that you will improve your effectiveness and get above average benefits and better results in socializing, dating, relationships, leadership, communication, negotiation, persuasion, sales… and anything people-related (or anything that requires strategic thinking).
The previous copy said, "...you will improve your effectiveness and get better, real-life benefits and results...".
However, saying that they'll get "real-life" benefits partially implies that the results they're currently getting aren't "real" which banks the new question, "Well, if the results I'm getting aren't something you consider 'real', then what do you consider a 'real' result and what are you actually planning to teach me in PU then?"
It's a phrasing that can raise more questions.
However, saying "above average benefits" and "better results" appeals to those who are driven and are already seeing some results (likely because, as PU recommends, they already have a minimum level of emotional intelligence and social skills) and are simply looking to take a step further to the next level.
We can make big promises because, for one reason:
We provide the results to back them up.
In my opinion, there's no reason this word should be in past-tense.
PU still continues to provide positive results for its students, new, past, and present.
And, it would be a mistake to imply otherwise.
Again and again.
A small thing, but "over and over" is a saying that ends on "again".
Therefore, the primary focus of the sentence is on the "again" and the reader, as a result, may have more processing fluency/favorability for this form of phrasing.
#10. Power University™ Tuition
Periods are needed at the end of these sentences.
#11. More Than Learning, It’s Training For Life
In this title, "Learning" and "Training" sound too synonymous to me here.
Almost like saying, "More than studying, it's education for life."
That sounds fine, but better might be:
More Than a Course, It’s Training For Life
You can use the title to differentiate PU as a course that's above the competition.
This way, the content that falls under the title is also more persuasive.
And, speaking of:
Power University’s curriculum is built to be the most effective to internalize the mindsets, strategies, and techniques until they become second nature.
Without the persuasive wording, at its core, this sentence roughly translates directly to:
Power University is built [with the purpose] to [help you] internalize mindsets, strategies, and techniques.
This sentence makes it sound like PU is built to internalize concepts.
And, I disagree.
The curriculum is built to deliver groundbreaking teachings. The ease of internalization is a side benefit of PU and its constant development that makes it special and separates it from the competition. But, ease of internalization is NOT PU's primary focus (it's not what it was built for).
First and foremost, PU was built to provide teachings because one must crawl before they walk. One must learn before they internalize.
Therefore, PU (and its curriculum) were built primarily to help people learn as a first priority. Then, the internalization comes next.
That said, the internalization should still be shared (and can even be framed as a great added benefit that not all other courses offer), while avoiding any wording that might suggest PU was built to internalize at the expense of everything else PU can actually do for others (such as first learning the groundbreaking strategies and techniques they don't already know, something that might be more important to the reader).
So, rather than use the word "to", say, "for" instead:
Power University’s curriculum is built to be the most effective for internalizing the mindsets, strategies, and techniques that achieve your social goals until they become second nature.
Feel free to disagree with any of the above.
Maybe I'll do a teardown of the FAQs section next.
Quote from Lucio Buffalmano on July 7, 2022, 9:10 pmThis is just too awesome, Ali, thank you so much!
I will be incorporating this feedback soon.
This is just too awesome, Ali, thank you so much!
I will be incorporating this feedback soon.
---
(Book a call) for personalized & private feedback
Quote from Lucio Buffalmano on July 13, 2022, 10:17 amAs I go deeper into this:
Quote from Ali Scarlett on July 7, 2022, 7:07 pmPower University’s curriculum is built to be the most effective to internalize the mindsets, strategies, and techniques until they become second nature.
Without the persuasive wording, at its core, this sentence roughly translates directly to:
Power University is built [with the purpose] to [help you] internalize mindsets, strategies, and techniques.
This sentence makes it sound like PU is built to internalize concepts.
And, I disagree.
The curriculum is built to deliver groundbreaking teachings. The ease of internalization is a side benefit of PU and its constant development that makes it special and separates it from the competition. But, ease of internalization is NOT PU's primary focus (it's not what it was built for).
First and foremost, PU was built to provide teachings because one must crawl before they walk. One must learn before they internalize.
Therefore, PU (and its curriculum) were built primarily to help people learn as a first priority. Then, the internalization comes next.
That said, the internalization should still be shared (and can even be framed as a great added benefit that not all other courses offer), while avoiding any wording that might suggest PU was built to internalize at the expense of everything else PU can actually do for others (such as first learning the groundbreaking strategies and techniques they don't already know, something that might be more important to the reader).
So, rather than use the word "to", say, "for" instead:
Power University’s curriculum is built to be the most effective for internalizing the mindsets, strategies, and techniques that achieve your social goals until they become second nature
This was really good.
A powerful reminder of never forgetting what the basics and foundations are.
In the past I thought of some cool feature or benefit of PU, maybe even a unique selling proposition, and I introduced it as a primary benefit.
But as you say, the main advantage is the groundbreaking curriculum, 100% right, and I needed to hear that, thank you!
As I go deeper into this:
Quote from Ali Scarlett on July 7, 2022, 7:07 pmPower University’s curriculum is built to be the most effective to internalize the mindsets, strategies, and techniques until they become second nature.
Without the persuasive wording, at its core, this sentence roughly translates directly to:
Power University is built [with the purpose] to [help you] internalize mindsets, strategies, and techniques.
This sentence makes it sound like PU is built to internalize concepts.
And, I disagree.
The curriculum is built to deliver groundbreaking teachings. The ease of internalization is a side benefit of PU and its constant development that makes it special and separates it from the competition. But, ease of internalization is NOT PU's primary focus (it's not what it was built for).
First and foremost, PU was built to provide teachings because one must crawl before they walk. One must learn before they internalize.
Therefore, PU (and its curriculum) were built primarily to help people learn as a first priority. Then, the internalization comes next.
That said, the internalization should still be shared (and can even be framed as a great added benefit that not all other courses offer), while avoiding any wording that might suggest PU was built to internalize at the expense of everything else PU can actually do for others (such as first learning the groundbreaking strategies and techniques they don't already know, something that might be more important to the reader).
So, rather than use the word "to", say, "for" instead:
Power University’s curriculum is built to be the most effective for internalizing the mindsets, strategies, and techniques that achieve your social goals until they become second nature
This was really good.
A powerful reminder of never forgetting what the basics and foundations are.
In the past I thought of some cool feature or benefit of PU, maybe even a unique selling proposition, and I introduced it as a primary benefit.
But as you say, the main advantage is the groundbreaking curriculum, 100% right, and I needed to hear that, thank you!
---
(Book a call) for personalized & private feedback
Quote from John Freeman on July 13, 2022, 12:32 pmI agree. The thing is that you’re a great teacher. I would highlight that the concepts are very well explained.
I agree. The thing is that you’re a great teacher. I would highlight that the concepts are very well explained.
Quote from Ali Scarlett on July 19, 2022, 2:57 amMore:
Chess Pieces Image
The disproportionate size of the chess pieces compared to the text beside it (along with the lower resolution) pull down the quality of the sales page to me.
So, a better option might be this:
*Note: It seems like this would be a change from the dimensions 762 x 630 to 369 x 353.
Power Dynamics Umbrella Image
See here:
This image has always been clever, but maybe only for the people who already understand it.
It seems like an "insider" explanation.
We who have been here for a while know that power dynamics is an umbrella term for many things, but sharing that here makes it confusing for a reader who's expecting one definition and is now seeing (possibly) many.
So, why not something more like this:
The benefits I see are that it:
- Puts the focus back on the purpose of power dynamics: it "equals success".
- It shares power dynamics in a context that's intuitive: we all know what IQ is, so from that jumping-off point, we can better begin to understand what power intelligence is (without writing out a full definition and hoping it resonates).
- It ties power dynamics back to "advanced social skills": so the dots connect more for the reader.
- It emphasizes the necessity for power dynamics for those who'd already be a fit for PU: which are people who need more power mastery and already know that (otherwise, it'd be difficult to sell them on something they don't know/believe they need, in which case they might need to read around TPM a bit more to develop a more well-rounded decision for themselves of whether or not they want to join).
But, this may not be the best option for the exact choice of replacement (and that's only if you all agree that one could be better for the readers). So, it's still up for debate.
Moving away from the images now, here are my thoughts on the colors.
Color Choices for Different Sections
Blindsight seems to have gone for a certain method when they did their sales page's coloring:
- First (title) section: Dark blue serves as an anchor for the page (especially since their website header is already white, it's a contrast that stands out and grabs attention)
- Second (logos) section: White section serves to provide contrast
- Third ("What is Neuromarketing?") section: Dark blue section serves to provide contrast
- Fourth ("The Curriculum") section: White section serves to provide contrast
- Fifth ("Taught by...") section: Dark blue section serves to provide contrast
- Sixth ("Who is the Neuroscience Expert on Your Team?") section: White section serves to provide contrast
- Seventh ("Learn More") section: Red section highlights that this is a call-to-action/buying section
- Eighth (testimonials) section: White section serves to provide contrast
- Ninth ("Who is the Neuromarketing Bootcamp for?") section: Dark blue section serves to provide contrast
- Tenth (promise) section: White section serves to provide contrast
- Eleventh ("Neuromarketing Certification™ Bootcamp") section: Red section highlights that this is a call-to-action/buying section
- Twelfth (FAQs) section: White section serves to provide contrast
- Thirteenth (get reimbursed/affiliate/contact) section: Dark blue section serves to provide contrast
You'll notice that all of the sections alternate between white and dark blue except for the sections with a call-to-action for moving the prospect to the next step (buying).
They might've went this route because:
- We tend to group elements of the same color together: an example is making the price the color green and then making the "Start Now" button green. Readers will group the start button with the price and conceptualize that the number they see is what they'll commit to paying when they click the button. Similarly, people will see the red and know it's a call-to-action section because of that consistency across the page.
- Cognitive dissonance: the longer someone stays on a section of the page with red on it, the more they'll back-rationalize to themself that they must want to buy if they're spending so much time on a section with the call-to-action (i.e. "If I wasn't at all interested, I'm sure I would've left already...").
- "...research shows that prices can seem cheaper in red fonts...": according to Kolenda, and that effect may apply to red backgrounds as well.
That's based on my limited knowledge though and they probably have a bigger, more scientific reason they reveal in their course.
But, for now, I don't think it hurts to mirror their template and make the call-to-action sections gold/yellow and keep the other sections alternating between black and white.
#4.3. The Curriculum
Using bullet points hides that they're each toggles.
Perhaps a little more web design would make them more obvious (and user-friendly):
Noticed some more updates to the copywriting, will share my thoughts on that as well soon.
More:
Chess Pieces Image
The disproportionate size of the chess pieces compared to the text beside it (along with the lower resolution) pull down the quality of the sales page to me.
So, a better option might be this:
*Note: It seems like this would be a change from the dimensions 762 x 630 to 369 x 353.
Power Dynamics Umbrella Image
See here:
This image has always been clever, but maybe only for the people who already understand it.
It seems like an "insider" explanation.
We who have been here for a while know that power dynamics is an umbrella term for many things, but sharing that here makes it confusing for a reader who's expecting one definition and is now seeing (possibly) many.
So, why not something more like this:
The benefits I see are that it:
- Puts the focus back on the purpose of power dynamics: it "equals success".
- It shares power dynamics in a context that's intuitive: we all know what IQ is, so from that jumping-off point, we can better begin to understand what power intelligence is (without writing out a full definition and hoping it resonates).
- It ties power dynamics back to "advanced social skills": so the dots connect more for the reader.
- It emphasizes the necessity for power dynamics for those who'd already be a fit for PU: which are people who need more power mastery and already know that (otherwise, it'd be difficult to sell them on something they don't know/believe they need, in which case they might need to read around TPM a bit more to develop a more well-rounded decision for themselves of whether or not they want to join).
But, this may not be the best option for the exact choice of replacement (and that's only if you all agree that one could be better for the readers). So, it's still up for debate.
Moving away from the images now, here are my thoughts on the colors.
Color Choices for Different Sections
Blindsight seems to have gone for a certain method when they did their sales page's coloring:
- First (title) section: Dark blue serves as an anchor for the page (especially since their website header is already white, it's a contrast that stands out and grabs attention)
- Second (logos) section: White section serves to provide contrast
- Third ("What is Neuromarketing?") section: Dark blue section serves to provide contrast
- Fourth ("The Curriculum") section: White section serves to provide contrast
- Fifth ("Taught by...") section: Dark blue section serves to provide contrast
- Sixth ("Who is the Neuroscience Expert on Your Team?") section: White section serves to provide contrast
- Seventh ("Learn More") section: Red section highlights that this is a call-to-action/buying section
- Eighth (testimonials) section: White section serves to provide contrast
- Ninth ("Who is the Neuromarketing Bootcamp for?") section: Dark blue section serves to provide contrast
- Tenth (promise) section: White section serves to provide contrast
- Eleventh ("Neuromarketing Certification™ Bootcamp") section: Red section highlights that this is a call-to-action/buying section
- Twelfth (FAQs) section: White section serves to provide contrast
- Thirteenth (get reimbursed/affiliate/contact) section: Dark blue section serves to provide contrast
You'll notice that all of the sections alternate between white and dark blue except for the sections with a call-to-action for moving the prospect to the next step (buying).
They might've went this route because:
- We tend to group elements of the same color together: an example is making the price the color green and then making the "Start Now" button green. Readers will group the start button with the price and conceptualize that the number they see is what they'll commit to paying when they click the button. Similarly, people will see the red and know it's a call-to-action section because of that consistency across the page.
- Cognitive dissonance: the longer someone stays on a section of the page with red on it, the more they'll back-rationalize to themself that they must want to buy if they're spending so much time on a section with the call-to-action (i.e. "If I wasn't at all interested, I'm sure I would've left already...").
- "...research shows that prices can seem cheaper in red fonts...": according to Kolenda, and that effect may apply to red backgrounds as well.
That's based on my limited knowledge though and they probably have a bigger, more scientific reason they reveal in their course.
But, for now, I don't think it hurts to mirror their template and make the call-to-action sections gold/yellow and keep the other sections alternating between black and white.
#4.3. The Curriculum
Using bullet points hides that they're each toggles.
Perhaps a little more web design would make them more obvious (and user-friendly):
Noticed some more updates to the copywriting, will share my thoughts on that as well soon.