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Tasking/Ordering around/Rules Stickler
Quote from
Mathieu on December 12, 2021, 3:30 pm
Hey,
Maybe let's see how the conversations go with your mother first?
I did what you said. I let the control of the kitchen domain to her. And it felt much more relax. The issues that put me in attack/defense mode seem like minor issues now. I still feel disempower, but i don't fight on any moves she make. I accept her leadership in this domain.
By using the question ladder,
I'm sorry, I don't know what it is. Is it in PU?
Hey,
Maybe let's see how the conversations go with your mother first?
I did what you said. I let the control of the kitchen domain to her. And it felt much more relax. The issues that put me in attack/defense mode seem like minor issues now. I still feel disempower, but i don't fight on any moves she make. I accept her leadership in this domain.
By using the question ladder,
I'm sorry, I don't know what it is. Is it in PU?
Lucio Buffalmano and Matthew Whitewood have reacted to this post.
Lucio BuffalmanoMatthew Whitewood
Sounds good! Thanks for sharing the updates.
I'm happy on your behalf if that works well for you.
I did what you said. I let the control of the kitchen domain to her. And it felt much more relax. The issues that put me in attack/defense mode seem like minor issues now. I still feel disempower, but i don't fight on any moves she make. I accept her leadership in this domain.
Your sense of "being attacked" can be a good thing.
It's how you watch out for your status as you said.
As long as you don't keep ruminating on the bad feelings such that it affects your well-being or dominates your rationality.
Questions as a method of frame control are inside Power University.
I'm not sure if the term question ladder is used.
Question ladder is basically the repeated use of questions to steer the conversation.
The question ladder is the technique Lucio explained in his first post on this thread:
For example:
Mother: Please do not pick this bread
You: why, what's wrong with this bread
Mother: it's stale, this other one is better
You: what if I like this bread independently of how fresh it is
Mother: it's not good for you, this one is fresh
You: what if I choose what's good for me and I still want this bread
(...)
That's just warm-up and preparing to ground.
I highly recommend that you skim the outline of Power University.
Then, you get a sense of where to look for what.
Sounds good! Thanks for sharing the updates.
I'm happy on your behalf if that works well for you.
I did what you said. I let the control of the kitchen domain to her. And it felt much more relax. The issues that put me in attack/defense mode seem like minor issues now. I still feel disempower, but i don't fight on any moves she make. I accept her leadership in this domain.
Your sense of "being attacked" can be a good thing.
It's how you watch out for your status as you said.
As long as you don't keep ruminating on the bad feelings such that it affects your well-being or dominates your rationality.
Questions as a method of frame control are inside Power University.
I'm not sure if the term question ladder is used.
Question ladder is basically the repeated use of questions to steer the conversation.
The question ladder is the technique Lucio explained in his first post on this thread:
For example:
Mother: Please do not pick this bread
You: why, what's wrong with this bread
Mother: it's stale, this other one is better
You: what if I like this bread independently of how fresh it is
Mother: it's not good for you, this one is fresh
You: what if I choose what's good for me and I still want this bread
(...)
That's just warm-up and preparing to ground.
I highly recommend that you skim the outline of Power University.
Then, you get a sense of where to look for what.
Lucio Buffalmano has reacted to this post.
