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Values: external vs internal

Hello guys,

this is an underspoken topic I believe. From my current knowledge in self-development, the core components of the self that can be addressed for positive changes are:

  • Identity: how you perceive yourself
  • Values: what you choose to live by and pursue
  • Beliefs: what you hold to be true AKA your reality

As Tom Bilyeu said: "Identity and Values drive behavior".

So, after this short intro, I would like to recommend you guys: the subtle art of not giving a F“#k by Mark Manson. There are some things that I think are good and other I think are not so productive in this book (don't take anything he says at face value). However, there is a key idea in this book:

Internal values are superior to External values

I wrote in this post above ranking your values.

If your values are:

  1. Status
  2. Money
  3. Power

Then you depend on people to get them. You don't directly control what people think of you, what your salary is or how much power you have.

If your values are:

  1. Respect
  2. Wisdom
  3. Love

Then what you value depends on you. You directly control how much respect, wisdom and love you will develop in your actions.

It's a rule-of-thumb. However, this idea explains why we can get in a loop of chasing our own tail. And why some people can never be satisfied.


Lucio Buffalmano, Transitioned and 2 other users have reacted to this post.
Lucio BuffalmanoTransitionedPaulineMathieu

Great post John.

I'm thinking of whether sticking it, moving it to the "mindsets" section (albeit it's not a mindset, I know), or to make a bigger post with links to the best post to go through for self-development.

Stef and Mathieu have reacted to this post.
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