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Typos, Grammar, Syntax, & Content Improvement - Megathread
Thank you @lucio, I really apreciated it.
drop-feed: I dont know what is a drop-feed, if it is something important let me know so I will wait until December, no problem about that: It will be my favorite Christmas Gift for bloody sure!! :)
anyways some suggestions, comments, and mistakes detected from: "The Fundamental Laws of Power"
I am really enjoying your crowning achievement course!
Control starts not with a struggle with yourself, but with an awareness of your dark side, of your less than staller qualities, and with acceptance.
Add: vulnerabilities
The goal is not to be totally independent, which would make for a hermit life but, whenever appropriate, to reduce your dependence.
at the end of the day we are all “interdependent”, that’s why loneliness sometimes can be just a mental illusion, albeit a powerful one
Saint Valentine is approaching, he believes gifts are a waste of time and money. She believes that it’s romantic and exchanging gifts is proof of caring.
What the couple does depends on whose frame prevails.
This is called, “love languages”, I learn it from Chase Amante.
In this Valentine’s eexample
Frames often determine who (have) more power in a relationship. /who (is) more powerful in a relationship.
You most will deal with “soft power”.
You will mostly deal with…
Shit tests (popular name yet I think we need a more self-descriptive nicer sounding one)
Needless to say, people deploying shame attacks are often using them simply as a tool of power (and virtue signaling)
Don’t let the(ir) weak position fool you
In social interactions, an important measure of effort (is) how much people are investing to keep engaging with you.
Least powerful are those who expend lots of effort for little or no returns. (Law of least effort/ sprezzatura)
And albeit the law is supposedly equal for everyone, the truth is that wealthy individuals enjoy more “exceptions”, and can sometimes avoid punishment by virtue of their friends, status, and power.
And a better lawyer/defense team with pay-rolled expert witness
First off, avoid having people pay you for stuff.
I think you mean: First off, avoid having people paying your stuff for you.
No to dinners, nights outs, or holidays, and yes to coffees, home-coooking
what constitutes evidence, how to collect evidence,
what constitutes evidence and how to collect it (you can make it more fluid)
I also advise you to avoid dealing with lawyers
(I am technically a lawyer, but no hard feelings Lucio, I think you should put some vaseline there for more sensible guys and girl lawyers, lol)
You might not have a business (yet).
But you can still et sued -or threatened-
The rich and powerful: who find loopholes around taxes
(according to Rothbard taxes are actually an income source for them, they also control the allocation of tax money and this can be considered a form of consumption even if they gift the money to others usually people they need support from as per the logic of political survival, so when they seem to pay taxes they are not really paying taxes, they are just getting a lower income than the nominal amount, something to make an accountant trickster blush).
the-fundamental-life-strategies-of-power/
Healthy cynicism includes looking at reality as it is
So Healthy cynicism = realism
it is and understanding that people are self-interested and can act in harmful ways.
(maybe add “harmful and self-destructive/counterintuitive ways”
to put others at ease and make them trust you (#)
congratulating people indirectly says “I’m on your side”,
Ambiguity as it can be read as: congratulating people indirectly (as in indirect congratulations, maybe that doesn’t even exist yet It flows better with the word order: congratulating people says indirectly…)
By expecting them to be better and improve, you pull them up from a judge frame
(It can read like you are pulling them away from a frame)
I suggest “pull them up by using the judge frame”
Collavorative Reframing: 3 examples
You one-up me? Shame on you for being uncooperative!
Shaming them into compliance
body-language-of-dominance/
Taking Up Space
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MH9bhf6Qhbw
Several studies have shown that people who touch others while speaking are perceived as more dominant.
(you mean in a conversation or when who is speaking? like if the one speaking is touching the one listening or the other way around, just for 100% clarification as sometimes the devil is in the details)
Women’s touch to men is interpreted by most men as a strong indicator of sexual interest.
and sometimes it is, yet not always, Chase Amante say that brief touch, like as if she is too nervous to touch for too long, is more likely to be a sign of sexual/romantic interest, more so if the women is usually non-touchy) I think it makes sense
Among primates, the lower status males move to give space to the alpha male.
sometimes it makes sense to wait until people engage you verbally and politely ask you to move before moving, in the meantime pretend you are not even aware of their need, they are supposed to ask unless they cannot speak, also don’t do it too fast like if you were scared of taking your time, don’t go to the other extreme to be a dickhead about it, or if people is on a clear emergency
Even if they will brush you or hit you, you won’t fall while standing still.
Of course: balance.
Yes, also you need good balance not to fall after crashing with the bigger guy :)
And if you are sitting inside in a diner or small couch, you take the spot the inside spot
Dangers of Bad Posture:
some go as far as believing it can make you uglier as posture and muscle strength/tension determines, in the long run and up to a point maxillofacial development (per wolff law of bone remodeling). (you can research about mewing and chewing or proper oral posture if you are not familiar with the research. I chew raw skin and mastic gum, i got some pretty gains on the mandible/masseter muscle, it makes your face look more masculine, sexy and dominant.)
It can also make circulation worse and this can be very bad from a health perspective
Open Body Language
Exception can be if close body language is more comfortable (like crossing arms when it is very cold) or something that make it clear that you are not signaling closeness.
Usually body language is highly contextual and should be analyzed on clusters of gestures and patterns.
powerful men move slow
I would say “powerful men move slow… until they have a very good reason to move quick”
Sometimes the contrast also project power, I think Bruce Lee did that, he usually moves very slow, with grace, as he was conserving his energy like a sleeping lion, until he “awakes” and throw an extremely quick punch or kick, and then he returns to a base of slowness, calmness...a sleeping majestic dragon. YET more important than quick or slow is being deliberate and purposeful in your movements and adjusting the speed accordingly (most often it will be slow or very slow anyways).
A power male walk spreads the legs wider than a woman would and shows a shoulder swag.
(“big balls signaling”)
parallel feet are more attrative
People indeed don’t usually like to be around -and be influenced- by people who operate outside of their genders (“gender deviant”,), and that’s also true for genders.
Some men might also resent and rebel against a female leader who mimics a man too much.
Genders again or you were gonna say something else?
Body language and non-verbals is a fascinating topic in my opinion!
Quote from Stef on November 16, 2020, 2:52 amThank you @lucio, I really apreciated it.
drop-feed: I dont know what is a drop-feed, if it is something important let me know so I will wait until December, no problem about that: It will be my favorite Christmas Gift for bloody sure!! ?
Drip-feed actually, I misspelled it.
It's the system whereby the lessons open up at an interval.
So now your user has restarted from day 1, meaning that every 5 days, a new module will open (and yes, by Christmas it will be ready to open in full :).
INTRO: Submission – ASSERTION – Aggression
Your goals and chosen strategies: as we’ve already said earlier, sometimes it can pay off to strategically be lower power
I think most often just appear/be perceived by an individual or group target as lower power, no actually being lower power.
“When you [state the behavior nonjudgmentally], I feel [disclose your feelings] because [clarify the effect on your life].”
I think an example may be useful for newcomers to assertion literature, maybe something along the lines:
"I think I heard you saying, and I don’t know the reason, purpose, what you want to mean or accomplish with saying that, that I was dumb because you think that I disagree with your point of view. That doesn’t make me particularly elated and it damages our relationship, we can do better and I expect better of you, that you talk directly to me and without insults or mockery, because I love you and respect you and I dont want that to change."
Well I used some nice-judge (I hope) frames and colaborative reframing there also and some subtle-threats (the "I dont want that to change" part, meaning It can change, I can stop loving and respecting you if you keep with X behavior for too long)
if you remain assertive in front of an onslaught of aggression, assertion is obviously not working.
Furthermore, you can seem powerless.
In that case, meeting aggression with aggression can help stop the aggression with the “pacing and leading technique”: first you meet at their level (pacing), showing you can play the same game, and then you bring them down (leading).
I think this makes a good example of matching verbal agression even in the face of possible death (if you are not Alfie/ Tom Hardy be careful with it specially while dealing with angry Tommy Shelby) and preventing the "agressor" from taking the moral high ground.
Let me know if you find the scene very cool!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=06RlyZxUnVM
Trump likely the presidency thanks to this technique.
Won
I think there are two forces at play: one the one hand, the fear of death or torture can stop some challenger(S).
Power Signals: How Power Looks Like
If they are not rude, it’ s OK to accept guiding behavior when you are actually the host.
You mean when you are the guest or when they are actually the host
Auch as, they use social pressure a tool for nonverbal compliance: they make you act without telling you explicitly to act.
But sometimes they create that tension without an actual reason, just for the fun of wielding power and seeing you squeak (and to show who’s in charge).
Sometimes they create that tension without an actual reason, just to show who’s in charge.
Some other times it will be in jest, just for the fun of wielding power and seeing you squeak.
- Repetition, you can fuse those 2 in 1
Sometimes you need to draw a powerful line in the send.
sand
Also perfect in relationships when a partner has crossed an important boundary.
Like Alfie: “He crossed the line” !! :)
Enrico, don’t you remember what is it (?).
Dominance thorough jokes and friendliness has a lot of upside
Through
freedom starts by throwing off the joke of the judges of this world.
Yoke
Remember the law of social effort, with power being held by those who spend less effort in the interaction?
I would say appear to spend less effort as it is “learned effortlesness” meaning that sometimes you make more effort just to look as if you were making less effort (it’s all about perception, much more so than actual effort)
I would rename it: “the law of less visible effort”…
Or we can use the Italian word for that:
Sprezzatura ([sprettsaˈtuːra]) is an Italian word that first appears in Baldassare Castiglione's 1528 The Book of the Courtier, where it is defined by the author as "a certain nonchalance, so as to conceal all art and make whatever one does or says appear to be without effort and almost without any thought about it".[1] It is the ability of the courtier to display "an easy facility in accomplishing difficult actions which hides the conscious effort that went into them".[2] Sprezzatura has also been described "as a form of defensive irony: the ability to disguise what one really desires, feels, thinks, and means or intends behind a mask of apparent reticence and nonchalance".[3]
The word has entered the English language; the Oxford English Dictionary defines it as "studied carelessness",[4] especially as a characteristic quality or style of art or literature.
Basically, think of it like this: it’s dominant when in a situation where most people would have done nothing, the socially powerful individual still allows himself to pass judgment.
Video example:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TcsPAcLDBkc
which is more disrespectful and more dominance because it’s done in the open.
dominant
Physically invading someone’s space, like putting one’s face very close to yours or getting extremely close to you is a major sign of someone who is trying to dominate you or threaten you (we will see an example later).
the science who study this is proxemics, I have an article about occulesics pending on my list.
But while submissive people don’t act on personal space’s encroachment (and )fail to draw their boundaries, more dominant individuals readily do so.
Power Words: How Power Sounds & Speaks
intervene to defend the person who is being attacked,d
When the conversation is 1:1, more often then not
than
Here is an example of Trump meeting with Democrats leaders Schumer and Pelosi:
the example is not there
People who are in charge will assertively want to make sure their subordinates understand. They will ask “did you get it?” or “everything clear?”.
in spanish we have a polite option "me explique" meaning: was I able to explain clearly what I want you to understand (to avoid implying the other person is dumb and puting the fault in oneself if he did not get it, yet now I can see how easily it can become a subtle power move, also if what you just explained is very clear and easy to understand, saying that is a non-sublte power move for sure)
he keeps inquiring as if the were the most normal thing in the world.
PRO Tip: Only use when an underling was being out of line
is
Ignoring people and (their) remarks is a skill you must develop
Wielding Social Pressure
Social pressure is not necessarily rude or intimidatory.
However, it does instill a certain fear or at least some social discomfort.
- Yes, and it is (one of) the basis of Sexual Tension.
This is one is good.
However, my by far favorite example of the power of silence is in Casino.
not too important, but i think the proper order is, ...,by far my favorite example...
This is very, very parent-like and super powerful (way?) to take over the judge role.
A third example is to avoiding punishment by strategically playing the submissive idiot.
"to avoid" sounds better
giving power to someone who has already power over you can only improve your situation.
I supposed you mean when by your "fake" giving he is really not getting anything new he already does not have, are there no exceptions to this rule?
for example people watching your submissive behavior may not come to help you if they see you appear to be "submiting by choice"
Similar situaiton if you blew past a red traffic light and get pulled over.
situation
It can also be cultural, with Japanese women presenting a higher incidence of passive and submissive behavior then,
than
Thank you so much, Stef!
Both to you and to Ali, I'm working uninterruptedely on some other tasks these days, but I will certainly come back to the typos and mistakes.
It's super valuable, and much appreciated!
If you recognize in yourself “too hard to please tendencies”, force yourself to combat it.
should add "trying too hard to please..." to avoid ambiguity as you can be someone "hard to please" something very different and usually associated with high power.
But getting so worked up also shows her weakness: she needs to aggress to defend herself, which tells us that his brother is getting to her.
her
“you should have more information”
another option is: I will research on that/ I will consult it with the experts on my team/ send me the links to the source of the information I will review it (high power as now you are tasking them and becoming a judge to the "authority"?)
Practical Steps to Increase Your Confidence & Social Power
This is lesson is more practical.
He was saying that having an erect penis of 10cm only had long been an issue for him and made him feel insecure.
He just need to move to Asia, jokes aside a 20 cm is considered very big (porn stuff), world average of soft/non erect penis is like 9 cm and erect around 13/14 cm (men like to believe they are talking about inches). An average women hand width is around 7 cm, so if she can grab your dick with 2 hands and still there is some dick not cover, you can be pretty sure you have an above average/ big dick, no need to measure it. If standing straight your erection can reach your belly button, probably your penis is around 20 cm, fun tip: horses dicks starts from 30 to 40 cm all the way to who knows what lengths (enough to impale a (wo)man to death, google Mr. hands death by a horse...)
being less emotional does not mean you show less emotions: there can be lots of power in showing emotions when the time is right.
This means that you analyze events with an emotionless mind.
Peaky blinders is full of nice examples of this like:
Whether you agree with him or not, he guy is remarkable when it comes in projecting inner confidence and competence.
the, to
Please not his mistake at minute 8:51.
So it’s not normla that almost eveyrone thinks they are worst than others. But chances are, you’re not.
you mean it is normal or it is not abnormal.
For example, (one) of the best things you can do for yourself is to turn schadenfreude, or happiness for your friends’ misfortunes, into “vicarious happiness”.
Not only for your friends, for anyone really: perfect strangers, random people, sometimes even for your enemies (easy said than done!)
As Stef said, vicarious happiness is a high-level life-hack.
Thank you for the credits!
Dalio got caght in the trap of trying to look good, denying his own will power.
caught, will to power
But we can change our automatic programming.
It will take some time and effort to make it automatic, but eventually, you’ll get there.
You mean to "rewire/rewrite" your automatic programming
The biggest improvement for me came in improving the fit of the clothes.
you can use another word like upgrading to avoid the similarity of sound.
You might not always have the power and willingness to do something about abuse, and sometimes you might not (have) even the power to push back on abusive behavior.
Nove. approach to assertiveness
There is a ton of books on assertiveness, and some just rehash content.
Not Julie de Azevedo Hanks.
Novel
