Quote from Ali Scarlett on March 12, 2023, 2:40 pm

• Dark Psychology and Manipulation: How to Analyze and Influence Anyone with Body Language, NLP, and Gaslighting (How to Master Your Communication Skills, ... of Influence, and Read People Like a Book.): been staying away from dark psychology and NLP, but based on the reviews, it could be good (and maybe hold some insights that would complement TPM's "how to spot gaslighting" article).
• Speed Reading: Learn to Read a 200+ Page Book in 1 Hour (Mental Performance): read a review from someone who said they managed to read a book a day for two days without skimming and got curious. (I've already taken much of Jim Kwik's "Kwik Reading" course, so I have a little more background knowledge to assess whether or not this book is good.)

Quote from Lucio Buffalmano on March 13, 2023, 4:58 pm

Thank you for sharing, Ali!

I did read a few of those "dark psychology books" and the average quality of what I had seen was very poor.

When it comes to review, I don't usually trust Amazon too much as there are ways to game that system and several reviews I've read on a few books activated my "scam radar" -I remember back when Amazon allowed for replies and answer there was a whole thread that would have been a great case study of "false review red flags"-.

Dark Psychology 101 for example has a 4.1 average whichs is not high but not too bad either, and it's one of the most underwhelming books I've ever read.

Still, it's better than nothing probably, and that book you listed may certainly be good and worth a try.

Quote from Ali Scarlett on March 23, 2023, 2:41 am

OFF-TOPIC

I asked ChatGPT for book recommendations to learn power dynamics.

Here's what they came up with (in order):

1. "Power: Why Some People Have It and Others Don't" by Jeffrey Pfeffer: This book explores the concept of power, why it matters, and how to acquire it. It provides practical advice on how to navigate power dynamics in the workplace and beyond.
2. "The 48 Laws of Power" by Robert Greene: This book explores the strategies and tactics used by successful people throughout history to acquire and maintain power. It provides insights into human behavior and can help readers understand the power dynamics at play in their own lives.
3. "Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion" by Robert Cialdini: This book explores the science of persuasion and how people are influenced to make decisions. It provides practical advice on how to influence others and can help readers understand the power dynamics in their personal and professional relationships.
4. "Mistakes Were Made (But Not By Me)" by Carol Tavris and Elliot Aronson: This book explores the concept of cognitive dissonance and how it can lead people to justify their actions, even when they are wrong. It provides insights into human behavior and can help readers understand the power dynamics at play in social situations.
5. "The Art of War" by Sun Tzu: This ancient Chinese text explores the strategies and tactics used in warfare, but its lessons can also be applied to power dynamics in other areas of life. It provides insights into human nature and can help readers understand the power dynamics at play in their personal and professional relationships.

ChatGPT: These books offer different perspectives on power dynamics, but they all provide insights into how power works and how to navigate power dynamics in different contexts.

I thought it was interesting that ChatGPT selected so many that made the TPM "best of" list.

Here are five more:

1. "The Power Paradox: How We Gain and Lose Influence" by Dacher Keltner: This book explores the paradoxical nature of power and how it can be gained and lost. It offers insights into the psychological and social factors that shape power dynamics and provides practical advice on how to use power ethically.
2. "Social Intelligence: The New Science of Human Relationships" by Daniel Goleman: This book explores the concept of social intelligence, which refers to the ability to navigate social situations effectively. It provides insights into the emotional and cognitive processes that underlie social interactions and can help readers understand the power dynamics at play in different situations.
3. "Winning Through Intimidation" by Robert J. Ringer: This book provides a controversial perspective on power dynamics, advocating for a more aggressive approach to negotiating and asserting oneself in different situations. While some of its advice may be considered unethical, it offers a unique perspective on power dynamics and the tactics that can be used to gain an advantage.
4. "The Social Animal: The Hidden Sources of Love, Character, and Achievement" by David Brooks: This book explores the factors that shape human behavior and relationships, including power dynamics. It offers insights into the social and psychological processes that underlie power dynamics and provides practical advice on how to navigate them in different contexts.
5. "The Prince" by Niccolo Machiavelli: This classic work explores the tactics and strategies used by successful leaders throughout history to acquire and maintain power. While some of its advice may be considered unethical, it offers a unique perspective on power dynamics and the strategies that can be used to gain an advantage.

OFF-TOPIC

Adding a few now (also recommended by ChatGPT) that haven't been reviewed yet by TPM:

1. "Power and Love: A Theory and Practice of Social Change" by Adam Kahane: This book explores the relationship between power and love and how they can be used together to achieve social change. It provides insights into the emotional and psychological factors that shape power dynamics in social movements.
2. "The Courage to Be Disliked: The Japanese Phenomenon That Shows You How to Change Your Life and Achieve Real Happiness" by Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga: This book explores the concept of self-acceptance and how it can be used to gain power and influence in personal and professional relationships.
3. "The Power of Persuasion: How We're Bought and Sold" by Robert Levine: This book explores the science of persuasion and how it can be used to gain power and influence in different contexts. It provides practical advice on how to persuade others and can help readers understand the power dynamics at play in different situations.
4. "The Power of Vulnerability: Teachings on Authenticity, Connection, and Courage" by Brené Brown: This book explores the power of vulnerability and how it can be used to build deeper and more meaningful connections with others. It provides practical advice on how to cultivate vulnerability and navigate power dynamics in personal and professional relationships.

Quote from Lucio Buffalmano on March 24, 2023, 8:43 am

Great stuff, thank you for sharing, Ali!

I suppose AI can't go too wrong if he pulls from most of the available resources online.

Still, that's also its limitation, in my opinion -together with, probably, giving too much weight to whatever has "power" in its title-.

About this one, and going to be very unfiltered and sharing a rather extreme opinion:

Quote from Ali Scarlett on March 23, 2023, 2:41 am

1. "The Power of Vulnerability: Teachings on Authenticity, Connection, and Courage" by Brené Brown: This book explores the power of vulnerability and how it can be used to build deeper and more meaningful connections with others. It provides practical advice on how to cultivate vulnerability and navigate power dynamics in personal and professional relationships.

Personality, I'd be very surprised if:

1. There's anything about power dynamics in that book
2. At least a portion of the content wouldn't end up being disempowering to most men, including encouraging behavior that to most high-power men around you would look like "Gen Z soy-boying" (note: we may disagree with that and maybe the culture will be changing, but it's still no less real)
3. There is any advice that would actually help men acquire power 
4. There's any practically applicable advise, something I've always struggled to find in Brene's book (but I'm giving it another try soon with one of her new ones)

So, to me, that's evidence that from this AI bot -or AI in generally, probably, you can at most get "ideas on what you may want to read".

But NOT advice on what is good or helpful for you to read.

Quote from B on April 16, 2023, 1:52 am

I’m reading this book:

Red Flags - How to spot frenemies, underminers and toxic people in every part of your life by Wendy L. Patrick

I am at the start but, apart from the very appealing title for a TPM student, the book seems interesting as it points out several unconscious judgments we all make from seeing specific aspect of people’s life and behavior.

Just as one example, the writer speaks of a person who dressed well in court as defendant indicted of a crime, but immediately lost all the “positive feel” when the judge saw the three friends he had brought to court with him - who looked like addicts.

The judge inferred that those people were dressed as the defendant himself would have been, if he had not decided to dress well for court.

Quote from Lucio Buffalmano on April 16, 2023, 8:48 am

Awesome, Bel!

Please do let us know if turns out to be good.

Quote from John Freeman on April 19, 2023, 1:41 pm

Based on recent review of Status game by you Lucio, I'm thinking about:

Status anxiety

I heard about it from Mark Manson.

Quote from B on June 21, 2023, 12:57 am

Quote from Bel on April 16, 2023, 1:52 am

I’m reading this book:

Red Flags - How to spot frenemies, underminers and toxic people in every part of your life by Wendy L. Patrick

I am at the start but, apart from the very appealing title for a TPM student, the book seems interesting as it points out several unconscious judgments we all make from seeing specific aspect of people’s life and behavior.

Just as one example, the writer speaks of a person who dressed well in court as defendant indicted of a crime, but immediately lost all the “positive feel” when the judge saw the three friends he had brought to court with him - who looked like addicts.

The judge inferred that those people were dressed as the defendant himself would have been, if he had not decided to dress well for court.

Two more concepts from this book, that I’m still reading:

- associative groups of people based on common interest foster a sense of similarity through association, which engenders automatic unconscious (and unwarranted) trust between members.

This, says the author, explains why psychopaths are fond of being members of such groups: because this automatic “trust” facilitates the commission of fraud against the other members, while “belonging to the group” provides a cover.

In my experience, this is exactly true: most narcissists and psychopaths I met (not all) tended to belong to associative groups (eg lawyers associations).

- inappropriate displays of emotions by dark triads unconsciously make people wary of them.

Since dark triads fake emotions, emotional events or stories or circumstances are what may best alert normal people to being in presence of one. If a person laughs at hearing about a death, for instance, others are automatically going to dislike him.

This (I believe) seems the other side of the idea of “displaying emotional variability”. It makes sense that being “more human” makes people like us more. Dark triads are simply incapable of this.

Quote from Lucio Buffalmano on June 21, 2023, 7:40 am

Reading it as well, really good book (and sounds like a very knowledgeable author, too, both in experience and research literature).