Former Community – We Moved

🆕 Coached community here, for posts & feedback public community here.

Please or Register to create posts and topics.

What books would you like to see TPM review next?

PreviousPage 6 of 7Next

The art of being right: 38 ways to win an argument, by Arthur Schopenhauer

Still haven't read it, but if TPM had been written in the 19th century by a German, this is what it would have been. Enter the darker side of dialetics :D

Lucio Buffalmano, Ali Scarlett and B have reacted to this post.
Lucio BuffalmanoAli ScarlettB
I had read before TPM the book that John recommended, "The Human Magnet Syndrome":
Quote from Lucio Buffalmano on September 6, 2023, 9:48 am

Thank you for sharing, John!

BTW, when I saw this (bold is mine):

Quote from John Freeman on September 4, 2023, 12:38 pm

The human magnet syndrome: why some people are attracted to manipulators.

I got interested since I often something that impactful should be promoted -and especially considering how relatively unknown the book seems to be-.

It's a great book that expounds a very interesting concept:

people who are submissive due to early trauma tend to get into relationships with people who are over covertly aggressive due to early trauma.

The author Ross Rosenberg is a psychologist and an expert on narcissism.

His concept can be exemplified by putting people on a scale relative to an ideal "0", which is the point where a person is in total equilibrium (ie has no unresolved trauma that compels him or her to adopt an overly submissive or overly aggressive stance):

-5   -4   -3   -2   -1   0  +1  +2  +3  +4  +5

Each number is a person, considered under his or her tendency to unconsciously use submission as a strategy, or covert aggression as a strategy in life.

The theory behind the book is that, if I am -4 in submission tendency, I will be attracted to people of the opposite sex who are +4 in covert aggression tendency.

Indeed this theory somewhat reflects personal experience. The more I was submissive in life due to unconscious motives, the more I was attracted to friends and partners who were highly manipulative and narcissistic.

Conversely, the more I resolved the unconscious motives behind my former submissiveness, the less I find now I am willing to tolerate these kinds of people, and the more I am "attracted" to stable people.

The book goes on to say that, in the author's experience, while it is possible to successfully treat - psychologically - people with submissive tendencies to bring them closer to the ideal "0" health point, it is almost always impossible to resolve the trauma of people with unconscious covertly aggressive tendencies.

This is because the early trauma that is in people who use the "covert aggression" life strategy is, in the author's experience, much much more severe than that that behind people who adopt "overly submissive" life strategies. The trauma behind "overly covert aggressive" people is also usually repressed to such an extent that bringing it to surface would destroy the personality.

Kavalier, Power Duck and Drazil have reacted to this post.
KavalierPower DuckDrazil

The Shallow Man by Coerte V. W. Felske

It's a fictional novel where the author recounts the dating experiences of a man very skilled at dating, and who only dates models.

While the plot is non-existent, what is interesting is the dating dynamics (which seemed to be very on point when I read it) and the reflections of the protagonist on dating.

I suppose if I read it again right now it would be possible to pick up more power dynamics, that at the time I did not "see" consciously.

Ali Scarlett and Kavalier have reacted to this post.
Ali ScarlettKavalier

On the theme of books that are just big PR stunts to retroactively establish a convenient "good morals story", I recently read "Be Stupid" by Renzo Rosso, the founder of the Diesel brand.

While the value of the book to teach entrepreneurship is non-existent, the book is still interesting because it is a big PR stunt from a person very aware of what he's doing.

Examples: the author speaks of his "good values, that his parents taught him"...

...and then tells the story of how he was hired by a company by faking his experience, which he did not have at all; and after being hired did not do any work at all for months, contenting himself to just be paid and "pursue women".

He lauds the Diesel brand's successes...

... and goes on to say that, in the cases where Diesel failed in a new market, that it was because "we weren't able to communicate to our local partner the image we wanted to transmit on that market" (compounding teacher frames, blameshifting, fake assumption of responsibility).

And of course all the photos where he hugs people's shoulders from behind...

Lucio Buffalmano, Jack and Kavalier have reacted to this post.
Lucio BuffalmanoJackKavalier

Thank you for sharing, Bel!

Sounds very, very similar to "Girlboss", the biography of the brand "nasty gal", and in the book she bragged about stealing.

Little value on how to be an entrepreneur, but lots of bragging to make up for it :).

Quote from Bel on November 11, 2023, 3:05 pm

While the value of the book to teach entrepreneurship is non-existent, the book is still interesting because it is a big PR stunt (...)

LOL, this one made me smile :).

OFF-TOPIC

I gotta say that Diesel makes some really good stuff.
Owned several pieces from them.

OFF-TOPIC

Jack, Kavalier and B have reacted to this post.
JackKavalierB
Community, new content and Confidence University now available here.

New book addition:

  • Winning Through Intimidation: How to Be the Victor, Not the Victim, in Business and in Life: a NYT bestseller with good reviews about dealing with bullies and MTUs in business, this could be a good addition to go next to Trump's The Art of the Deal.
Lucio Buffalmano and Kavalier have reacted to this post.
Lucio BuffalmanoKavalier

Hello TPM team,

I discovered recently Aaron Cleary from Michael Sartain's youtube channel. Here are the books I put on my list (listening to the first one: great!) that I think are worth reviewing:

I wish you a great day.

Lucio Buffalmano, Ali Scarlett and Kavalier have reacted to this post.
Lucio BuffalmanoAli ScarlettKavalier

Interesting, thank you for sharing John.

One of them was on my reading list.

If anyone has read them and/or does, happy to read your thoughts.

Ali Scarlett, John Freeman and Kavalier have reacted to this post.
Ali ScarlettJohn FreemanKavalier
Community, new content and Confidence University now available here.

If that's helpful, here is the author speaking shortly about them (see the time bar for the others, they're in following order):

Kavalier and Power Duck have reacted to this post.
KavalierPower Duck
Quote from Bel on April 16, 2023, 1:52 am

I’m reading this book:

Red Flags - How to spot frenemies, underminers and toxic people in every part of your life by Wendy L. Patrick

I am at the start but, apart from the very appealing title for a TPM student, the book seems interesting as it points out several unconscious judgments we all make from seeing specific aspect of people’s life and behavior.

Just as one example, the writer speaks of a person who dressed well in court as defendant indicted of a crime, but immediately lost all the “positive feel” when the judge saw the three friends he had brought to court with him - who looked like addicts.

The judge inferred that those people were dressed as the defendant himself would have been, if he had not decided to dress well for court.

Thanks Bel, this was a hidden gem.

Read it, reviewed it, and queued it for publishing.

The author displays both experience, scientific-literature knowledge, and critical thinking skills.
Proper "3-pillars" work.

And ties it all together with a simple but effective framework.

Great stuff, would feature in a "best book for reading people" list.
Maybe in the future.

Ali Scarlett, John Freeman and 4 other users have reacted to this post.
Ali ScarlettJohn FreemanJackKavalierBPower Duck
Community, new content and Confidence University now available here.
PreviousPage 6 of 7Next
Processing...
Scroll to Top