Simping refers to excessive or unreciprocated emotional or material investment in women.
The term, often used pejoratively, mocks men are overly eager or submissive in pursuing women.
In this article, we explain the underlying dynamics of this phenomenon, how it changed dating, and we’ll shed new light on the true drivers of simp ridiculing.
Namely, we contend that “simp ridiculing” is a form of competitor derogation, manipulation, and reactionary politics.
Intro: Simps are no quitters
Simps are not in an enviable position.
They chase women who neither respect nor desire them.
When these women do reciprocate, it’s typically transactional—and expensive.
However, simps are no quitters.
Instead, they’re some of the most passionate and engaged pursuers of women.
That already leads to an interesting observation.
Men don’t ridicule the quitters -those who drop out of the dating game-.
But they ridicule simps.
Why?
Because, unconsciously, these men know that simps make dating harder for them.
Similar dynamics apply to more submissive men and the more popular “alpha male VS beta male” dichotomy.
But in this article we focus on “simping”.
Simping: a new outlet for an old drive
In our evolutionary past, simping wouldn’t go far.
A lower-status guy would crush on the attractive lady of the tribe.
But with nothing to give, he would get nothing back.
If he insisted, he’d be driven out of the tribe.
And if he had any self-preservation instincts, he’d settle for a more homely companion.
Modern civilization changed that.
Today’s simps provide likes, comments, followers, and low-risk gratification.
Plus, they can be high-income programmers, gamers, or heirs.
And they have something their ancestors didn’t have: money.
Heck, in modern days even a welfare recipient living in mom’s basement could simp.
Send 1k a month to his crush, and she makes his month with a flying kiss back.
The Internet then took it to yet another level.
It connected attractive but previously unknown women to millions of worldwide simps.
And that changed the game.
How simping made dating harder for all
Her: (learned from simps that free meals exist and now tries to do the same with everyone)
Me: (pays the “simp tax” with wasted time)
Simps rarely make attractive options.
Even a physically attractive simp wouldn’t make for an attractive option.
Total disregard for basic interpersonal power dynamics principles means he’d soon lose any respect and attraction.
However, attractiveness isn’t required to change dating dynamics and women’s psychology.
Here’s how it works:
1. Simps empower women financially
Financially empowered women don’t need male providers.
It’s a seemingly small but large shift.
An attractive but poor woman still needs a man to raise a child.
But the attractive female recipient of simp largesse doesn’t need a provider.
She may want one.
Or she may want a more dominant partner -she probably does-.
But the dynamics fundamentally change.
Wealth gives her more negotiation power.
Take a successful Only Fans woman as an example.
Even if she craved family and a relationship, it’s still easier for her to walk away when she has her job and income.
So these wealthier women are more empowered and independent.
And that bothers and frightens many men.
Especially the more controlling ones who’d rather have women poor and dependent.
2. Simps make women more “strategic”
Doting simps incentivize women to learn games and manipulation.
It’s simple logic:
- Better manipulation = higher income = higher incentive to manipulate.
The bad news for men is this:
We know that here at TPM.
Skills in persuasion, manipulation, and interpersonal power dynamics empower people.
We’re all for empowerment here, including women’s empowerment.
But when that empowerment includes the “darker arts”, we urge caution.
As the famous Nietzche quote goes “if you stare into the abyss, the abyss stares back at you”.
That can come at a relationship cost because some people struggle to “switch off” their manipulative side that works so well in business.
Some people of course learn the dark arts but can put them aside.
These people are even more empowered.
But here’s come the kicker:
Deep down many men fear empowered women.
Not only are empowered women harder to attract, but they’re also harder to keep attracted.
Higher risk of straying and heartbreak.
The truth is, a more naive woman is a much safer option for most men.
Especially for the relationship-minded men.
4. Simps turn more women into “working girls”
And that shrinks the dating pool for relationship-minded men.
In many ways, I get it.
If I wanted a “serious” relationship, I’d also prefer a woman who’s not selling soft pornography.
Of course, it’s not like simping can turn saints into devils.
Certain characters are more attracted to that line of work to begin with.
But it works both ways.
The more simps to milk, the more women are tempted to sell attention, pictures… And sometimes bodies.
And even girls who may have dreamed of a loving marriage may gradually shift toward a more transactional worldview.
5. Simps inflate women’s self-esteem
There is a saying among men:
The best girl is an 8 who thinks she’s a 6.
I think that any man saying that may want to re-assess his public statements and what they sub-communicate.
But I get their point.
And that girl doesn’t exist anymore with the simping phenomenon.
If anything, now there is an army of women who are the opposite.
Try putting yourself in women’s shoes for a second.
Imagine you had hundreds of women throwing themselves at you.
Don’t you think your confidence and self-esteem may grow?
Or, at least, your perceived mate value?
And don’t you think that you’d approach women differently, including the more attractive ones?
And that you’d be less willing to put up with their demands or quirks?
Of course you would.
Speaking of which:
6. Simps make women more demanding & entitled
There are studies on this.
When the ratio of men to women changes, people’s psychology changes -both men’s and women’s-.
And all the more so if you make those extra men extra doting.
Here is how that can translate into a simple daily man-to-woman interaction:
Her: Meet me close to my place
Me: I invite you, I choose the place
Her: Not a gentleman, bye
One could argue she wouldn’t say that if I was super attractive.
Or famous.
Or if time hadn’t put me in the age bracket where investing may be more expected.
All fair interpretations.
One may even say she’s right.
And that I was an as*hole to stick to my guns.
Maybe.
This isn’t a recommendation on how anyone should date.
It’s an analysis of interpersonal dating dynamics.
And she dug her heels because simps taught her she can expect to be wined and dined on her terms.
Without simps, that expectation and demand wouldn’t even exist.
At the least, I’d have far higher leverage if simps didn’t exist.
How about top men being in a different category?
It’s true:
“Women make rules for low-status men, but break rules for high-status men“.
But population-level dynamics still affect individuals.
Ferrari isn’t directly competing with Stellantis either.
It’s also different than Porsche.
But if, say, the world’s roads changed, they change for all.
And if all those other carmakers disappeared, Ferrari still gains.
The simp’s tax is smaller in person.
But it’s much larger online (not an accident both our examples here were from online dating).
Now you can understand why…
Why Men Shame Simps
So, this is why men mock the simps:
1. Value-signaling
To sub-communicate they’re “better than simps”.
We’ve seen this behavior already.
See for example leaders’ social climbing, alpha male posturing, and covert bragging in general.
While criticizing others can be a valid strategy to signal higher value, it’s easy to come across as nasty.
Plus, being better than a low bar isn’t exactly ‘top-1% signaling’ either.
So, if that’s you: quit it.
It’s bad enough to “show value” with nasty social climbing.
But it just gets pathetic when you show off that you’re one rung above last.
Learn better in Power University.
2. Shame simps into giving up dating
The more simps drop out of dating, the easier for those who stay in the game.
3. Shame other men into NOT spending and courting
It works like this:
The fewer men who court and spend on women, the less women can expect from men, the easier dating becomes for men.
4. Envy from lower-status men
Simps monopolize some of the most attractive women’s time.
Sure, simps get little for an inordinate amount of time and investment.
It’s a sucker’s trade that we’d STRONGLY advise against.
But most guys get nothing from attractive women.
So when even a simp gets more action than you… You know you will lash out :).
5. Lower women’s expectations with the “losers’ frame”
The simp-taunting seeks to insulate women against courtship expectations.
This is what the simping derogation tries to sub-communicate:
Ladies, these guys who splurge on you are losers. See how little we “real” men respect them?
So don’t use them as comparison please
Traditional relationship-minded men lead the shaming
I suspect that it’s mostly more traditional men who shame simps.
More conservative men are more at odds with:
- Women’s sexuality, including a stronger incidence of Madonna-whore dichotomy
- Women’s empowerment
- Libertine dating culture
Traditional Western men support the “one man, one woman” monogamous ideal.
The 1950s dream of a supporting housewife baking apple pies grows even more distant with simping.
Simps undermine the monogamy ideal with devoted and submissive women.
So simps are the relationship-minded men’s enemy.
These men shame simps for shaming, and shame women for gaining from simps.
The female equivalent of simp-shaming
The manosphere equivalent of women has a term for the female simple equivalent:
“pick me”.
The “pick-mes” are women who actively seek and want a man, adhere to traditional gender roles, and give their full selves to the relationship.
And they get mercilessly shamed and mocked.
Why?
Same principle, but inverted.
They make it too easy for men, raise men’s expectations and demands, and make dating harder for other women.
See the patterns?
The more these women can shame the “pick me” ladies, the easier it is for them.
But if a great guy showed up at their door, guess what the smartest ones would do?
They’d make it easier for them to get together, of course.
Summary
Simping is a modern evolution of an age-old phenomenon.
While it empowers some women and reshapes dating dynamics, it also raises expectations, incentivizes competition, and sparks shaming from other men.
We cast no blame but encourage men to abandon pointless shaming—and invite simps to read more here or join Power University.
Acknowledgments of Uncertainty
This analysis is an educated hypothesis based on established underlying dynamics and logical reasoning, but not yet supported by empirical data.
For more practical and empirically sound self-development, see Power University.
