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Ryan Gosling Approach Analysis (Crazy Stupid Love)
Look at this scene:
https://youtu.be/rUhSc3toTDE?time=70s
Having a girl -or anyone, for that matter- admitting that they find you attractive, that they like you or that they admire you, is super powerful.
So asking:
Do you find me attractive?
Is super powerful...
... As long as you get a yes!
It's not that difficult to get a yes.
But you need some good chemistry, bantering, and good flirting.
Or at least, a strong emotional connection.
Don't Ask "Do You Find Me Attractive" Early on
However, when you ask it too early and/or when she's on the fence, you are more likely to get a no.
Women are both rather conservative and very wary of protecting their status, so unless you get strong attraction signals, don't ask it!
Don't Insist If You Can't Get a Yes
The mistake Ryan Goslin does is that not only he asks too early and gets a no.
But he keeps insisting, thus forcing a dynamic of him forcing himself onto her while she is more and more forced to deny any attraction.
The more Gosling keeps chasing for a yes, the more he loses value. And the more she repeats "no" the more likely she is to start believing it (cognitive dissonance)
Rating Ryan Gosling Approach
The overall approach is great, but that "small" detail here, well.. It's not actually small at all.
That's a huge mistake there which turns the interaction into him chasing her. He still looks confident as hell and cool AF. But from then on the power dynamics are simply too skewed against him.
It turns into a big show that looks cool, but it's actually rather ineffective.
This is a powerful reminder that what looks attractive and what works are, sometimes, not exactly the same.
- 10/10 for the beginning
- 2/10 from that "do you find me attractive" onward
