Are you looking for ways to flirt with a girl over text?
You have come to the right place.
My name is Lucio, and I have sent thousands upon thousands of texts (plus I’m a psychology nut and hold a master in communication).
This article will explain to you all the best techniques on how to flirt with a girl over text.
- Flirting Text Messages
- And Enjoy Text Flirting
Flirting Text Messages
Knowing how to flirt with a girl over text is a great skill to have.
It will make your more desirable, more entertaining and, yes, you’ll incidentally also get laid more -not that you were after that of course ;)-.
So let’s start with the top text flirting guidelines -all real-life flirting examples from my phone or FB-.
#1. Imply She’s Into Boys
This is a favorite of mine: great upside and no drawbacks.
Women are smothered by the yoke of having to play “innocent” and feign disinterest in sex and men (Madonna-Whore Dichotomy). Implying they’re into boys (and sex) liberates them by communicating in flirty style that you “get them”. She lets her hair down, her guard comes down.. And maybe later some clothing item will come down too ;).
#2. Imply She’s Into You
Flirt by telling her she’s so into you or, even better, that you’re worried she is in danger of falling for you.
Her mind be running ;).
3. Imply She’s Seducing You
Normally, it’s the man who chases the woman.
The rule of thumb indeed is that man aggresses and the woman plays coy.
When you don’t do it too obviously, sometimes women will try to poke you to get you chasing.
But wouldn’t it be better if she was trying to get you instead?
And that’s what you do with top-notch flirting: you turn the tables.
They’re dressing up?
Just right out of the shower?
Don’t take the bait, go texty caveman and show your cards (leave that for later): tell her she’s using all tricks in the books to seduce you instead ;).
#4. Turn The Boring Into Exciting
Flirty guys, the lovers types, don’t dwell on dull stories and negative emotions. They turn the heat on instead. They turn humdrum bore fests into flirty excitement feasts.
And women love it.
#5. Leave Her Aching for More
And just when fireworks are about to get off and she’s turning into a too hot to handle mess… You pull back.
Women love the mystery, the hinted. Don’t spoil it by trespassing into the obvious and crude, but kiss them good night and tuck them up.. :).
…And guess who they’ll be thinking of when waking up? 🙂
#6. Hint At Sexuality
And here is how you effectively inject sex into the conversation:
And now the big one. Flirting is hinting at sexual. It’s (technically) not flirting anymore if you’re openly discussing sex.
Rule #1: hints and mystery are sexy, clinical and crude are not.
Rule #2: fully sexual is very risky: proceed with caution.
Exceptions are: she starts it, she sends nudes or she opens up sexually.
Direct sexual flirting works best with:
- Older women (you’re the toy boy)
- Online dating (filter in DTF, filter out “no ONS”)
- Married women (you’re the sexy distraction)
- MILFs (got the baby already, no time for games)
#7. Hint At Babies Together
Hinting at the product of sex is a unique, flirtatious way of broaching sex as a foregone conclusion between you two.
If you’re talking babies, sex obviously is going to happen.
Of course, use it only when it’s abundantly obvious you’re kidding or it’s not flirting but family planning (and not cool :).
- A Tinder match opening message
- Different “races” where you play the “cute mix card”
- Somehow black girls seem to love it
#8. Move From Text Flirting to Meet
Flirting is the preamble of something better -and real- to possibly happen. Imagine text flirting as the drum-roll. Drum-rolls glorify your daring entrance, but If all you do is drumrolling and no cigar, then… Then you might as well shoot the football breeze with your pals.
Be a guy who gets the job done instead: flirt a bit and then go for the “date”.
To do just that, consider this guide. It’s super cheap for the value it offers.
And Enjoy Text Flirting
Flirting excites us, makes us smile and cheers us up.
It’s one of life’s pleasure: adopt this mentality and you’ll flirt better.
I love women who can flirt.
Big grin when she implied her private dance would be “too much for me” :).
Bonus: These Ain’t Flirting But Cheese
I took a look around before writing this post and I’ve noticed there is some terrible advice from the most popular sources.
Read below what to avoid and in blue why they’re terrible.
I know you’re probably thinking of me, so we might as well text
=I was thinking of you but I’m awkwardly hiding behind a smokescreen.
We’re breaking up, you’re too much trouble
=”Funny” relationship push/pull. Not the worst, but the sexiest flirts usually avoid any early relationship-talk.
And that makes you my third favorite girl to text to
=Good if you’re a teen. Otherwise it implies you text a lot. And no, implying you text a lot to girls is still not sexy.
You’ll never guess what I’m doing right now
=You’re not doing anything obviously. Except pondering of a cheesy way to contact her, that is.
Any fun / smart way of asking for nudes
=What’s the nudes’ intended use? Because learning how to flirt with a girl over text is about doing stuff in person.
Flirting with a girl is a bit of an art, but follow these guidelines and your text flirting will improve dramatically. And your texts will stand out, because any hint at sex is also a huge attention grabber.
A parting note: the in-person impression is paramount for effective flirting.
Flirting with a girl over text works best when she thinks you are flirt-worthy… In person.
No excuse for cheese, but at that point, even average stuff becomes strong text flirting.
GET THE FULL TEXTING GUIDE
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The author holds a master's degree from La Sapienza, department of communication and sociological research, and is a member of the American Psychology Association (APA).
He studies psychology, persuasion, social & dating strategies, and anything related to people and power dynamics.
Lucio's approach combines science, critical analysis, and a continuous quest for first-hand experience & observation.
He loves all three aspects, and believes that to effectively teach social strategies, the three must go together.
You can learn it all in one fell swoop with Power University.