Short Thank You's and Feedback
Thank you @transitioned for being such a brother-in-arms. Thank you for believing in me as a doctor. This encourages me to push and challenge myself!
I want to thank you Lucio for your advice about how to deal with negative performance reviews/feed-backs. I use the strategy you told me about making them say something positive about me. I use it as often as I can.
When I give them feed-back on a case and I did something good, I make sure to leave a silence until I hear a: “that was good/good job”
Or I put into a question if what I did was the right approach (honest question) if I did it right it nudges them to say that I did good.
So it is effective.
Rock on, John, and thank you for the thank you and for the note (always super helpful to know how the real-life application is going).
As usual, most of the merit goes to the more difficult part: applying it.
So kudos to you.
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Quote from Lucio Buffalmano on April 16, 2023, 3:22 pmNice one, Bel!
Always good to read your take as you've gotten really really good at sniffing power movers and officially reaching beast mode.
is the best compliment I could receive.
Thank you for the thank you, @Bel!
And if I may add, it's often been an enlightening and a much-needed "wake up call" to read your messages because you're the only person in here -and in a super small group of 2 even including real life- that not only has power awareness, but that is also often higher up than I am in "toughness of judgment" when it comes to (covertly) aggressive or win-lose behavior.
That's important because not only we can make assessment mistakes by ourselves but also because, as social animals, we naturally tend to adapt to the majority.
So I've often ended up being too easy-going, "open-minded" or "accepting" -and we know here that often means "naive" and perpetuating a win-lose-.
And more than once it's been your take on a situation ro behavior that made me realize that.
P.S.:
If anyone is reading here, this also means that chances are you're being too lenient in assessing people or behavior.
And:
Quote from John Freeman on April 16, 2023, 8:15 pmThanks Lucio and thanks Bel for asking the follow-up question (see below).
I think this whole dynamics could fit into PU as a case study, a link or whatever.
He:
- Didn't follow up the first time
- Took a rather long break
That's the behavior of the person who's not overly invested.
Plus:
- Told you to call him
That's the behavior of the person who's expecting to be chased (to put it negatively) and to be led (to put it positively).
As for calling, it's the usual:
- higher power
- more engaging
- medium shift for power reset: you're "losing" on emails (losing power, at least), over-investing and chasing. Stop fighting a losing battle and open a new front
- medium shift for shifting gear, he isn't very responsive via email, you gotta get him on a more responsive and faster medium or it's gonna die
To me, this is very advanced.
Thank you for this note, John!
Also super helpful to know what's helpful and/or advanced (or its opposites, not helpful, or obvious/basic).
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From this thread, I decided to answer here to avoid going off topic in Power Duck's journal.
Quote from Lucio Buffalmano on June 25, 2023, 11:19 amI think this could make for a great article.
Potentially, a foundational one.
Since you experienced it yourself Mats and potentially already overcome, let me know if you'd be interested in making an article on it.
First of all, thank you for the kind words Lucio!
I also think this could make for a great article. However I'll have very limited time for the next two months. I could potentially start working on it after that, but honestly writing an article looks like a big project so I don't want to make any promises. I'll think about it some more when I have less going on.
If you or anybody else would rather write it before then that's obviously fine as well.
OFF-TOPIC
Thank you for the thank you, Mats.
And 2x thank you for not going off-topic there :D.
As for the article, sounds great.
Let's do that you do your thing and then whenever you have the time and/or willingness, feel free to go for it.
And if I go for it first, I'll also go ahead and then eventually add your inputs there besides the original spark, if any.
This is the topic I created for that:
OFF-TOPIC
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Thank you Lucio for this in your Journal. Gifts me another tool.
"Me: What did you misunderstand from his email, please tell me, I want to understand
I asked for clarification on purpose because it stank as a lie.
One, there wasn't much to misunderstand.
And two, if you misunderstand, then you should seek fast clarification, not ignore".
One a-hole at work. His MO is to claim not to understand any task you ask him to do.
I d tried publicly: eye rolling, the look away, the half spoken really? the over explaining like to a 5 YO. But not effective as this guy has no shame.
Thank you for the "thank you", Transitioned!
It's always helpful to know what's helpful (and how it was used).
And of course, you know it's all in the execution, so props to you 🙂
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Thank you for the compliment in DGX37 journal Lucio! :
Quote from Lucio Buffalmano on June 30, 2023, 9:41 amExactly, great call Power duck!