#3 Human Lie Detection

Before Vanessa became a household name in the world of social skills books, she encountered a significant challenge with her first book project.

She spent three years collaborating with a major publisher, pouring her heart into a manuscript that ultimately was a commercial failure—or so she defines it, some authors would consider it an OK result.

Pros & Cons of Lie Detection

In my opinion, this is not Vanessa’s ‘least good’ because of the copies it sold or didn’t sell.

It’s because ‘human lie detection’ is an oxymoron.

As the Routledge Persuasion Handbook states, training people in lie detection only shows minor improvements, and sometimes even regressions in accuracy.

And if you can barely improve with training, how far can you take someone with a book?

I also have doubts regarding the approach to spotting detection.
And I suspect the regressions occur because people over-focus on trying to detect specific cues, and miss everything else—ie.: they lose the forest for the tree.

This is why here at TPM we still love our cues, but rely more on different strategies.
For example:

• Frame control to encourage win-win thinking and discourage cheating
• Power intelligence to increase context awareness (e.g., conflicts of interest)
• Reading general character (e.g.: honorable character VS taker)
• Self-defense strategies

There is one more reason I’m not a fan of the cue approach to detecting lies.
Trying to detect lies by looking at common signals at best catches the bad liars, and misses the good liars. And the latter are the people you want to avoid the most.

Anyway, fortunately, Vanessa didn’t stop writing books after her first attempt fell below her expectations.
She shares that while she vowed never to write again, her husband supported and encouraged her to move on (sounds like a supportive husband!).

With time and great work, her website grew more popular, her YouTube channel gained subscribers… And she hit it big with her next book:

#2. Captivate: Vanessa’s Guide to Socialization

Published in 2017, Captivate: The Science of Succeeding with People marked Vanessa’s breakthrough into the literary world.

Translated into 16 languages, this book offers a comprehensive toolkit for improving social skills, mastering first impressions, and navigating interpersonal dynamics.

Vanessa draws on her experience to provide actionable strategies, such as the “highlighting” technique—celebrating others’ successes to build rapport—and tailoring communication to personality types using frameworks like the Big Five traits (openness, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness, and neuroticism).

While grounded on some valid research, Captivate extends into ‘Vanessa’s approach to social skills’, with sparkling and starting conversations with “I want to test a new conversation starter” :).

If you like Vanessa’s style, and it seems to be working great for her, that’s a plus.

Pros and Cons of Captivate

PROS:

• + Practical strategies for enhancing social skills and leadership.
• + Good broad insights into personality types and how to adapt communication.
• + Effective and timeless techniques for making good first impressions, like maintaining strong eye contact.

CONS:

• – Relies on the Myers-Briggs, which lacks strong scientific backing.
• – Frequent upsells to Vanessa’s website can disrupt the reading experience.
• – Some dating advice for men is less than ideal for successful dating.

For a deeper dive, check out this Captivate review.
While Captivate is a strong starting point for social skills books, it feels more like ‘Vanessa’s style’ rather than a book that works for anyone.
Vanessa addresses this in her next work.

#1. Cues: A Foundation of Social Skills

Released in 2022, Cues: Master the Secret Language of Charismatic Communication has become Vanessa’s best-selling and most successful book.

I enjoyed Cues the most as it draws from the same research we used for our original power and warmth approach.
We’re more tailored to men, status, and respect though, so her take stands strong on its own, and adds plenty of value.

Indeed, Vanessa sparked valuable updates to our own article, and her list of Cues was even linked as an extra resource from Power University (with just minor adjustments from our end).

This book offers readers practical tools to influence how they’re perceived through gestures, facial expressions, and tone.
Vanessa’s engaging writing style and exceptional narration (she narrates the audiobook 👍🏼) brings the content to life, making it both educational and enjoyable.

One standout example is her advice on using “open palms” early on to signal trustworthiness and approachability.
She also explores how to read others’ cues, like a furrowed brow indicating confusion, to adjust your communication in real-time.

Finally, what makes Cues such an engaging read is that Vanessa ties her principles to real-life examples, an approach we love and always embraced since our early beginnings.
That makes Cues a top contender among the best social skills books available today.

Pros and Cons of Cues

PROS

• + Highly practical with immediately actionable nonverbal techniques.
• + Engaging writing paired with Vanessa’s warm, charismatic narration.
• + Vanessa embodies her teachings, making the book authentic and relatable.

CONS

• – Vanessa’s leaning stronger towards warmth may not align with men seeking to project power or dominance.
• – Some examples, such as analyzing NBA player John Stockton’s cues, felt a bit forced and oversimplifying more complex dynamics.
• – Emphasis on ‘catching lies’ through cues, albeit you’re better off reading characters, rather than ‘cues of lying’.

Explore this Cues review for more details.

What’s Vanessa’s Best Book? Why Cues Stands Out

When it comes to determining Vanessa Van Edwards’ best book, the choice is clear: Cues takes the crown.

While Captivate is an excellent introduction to social skills, Cues dives deeper into a more foundational aspect of social skills: power and warmth.
It’s not by accident that power and warmth was one of the very first articles on this website, and still remains one of our foundational approaches to successful socialization.

Compared to Captivate, Cues is more practical and effective.

For instance, where Captivate spends time on personality frameworks like Myers-Briggs, Cues shifts the focus from debated theories to practical behaviors.

Vanessa’s engaging style also shines brighter in Cues, with vivid examples—like decoding a politician’s hand gestures—that make the content stick.
While Captivate is a good read for beginners, Cues is a more effective book that can elevate most readers interested in perfecting their social skills, charisma, and charm.

The Book For Men Who Want More…

The Social Stragist provides a quick overview of our groundbreaking approach to men’s self-development based on the science of power dynamics

For ambitious men looking for social skills books to gain an edge for respect, status, attraction, and advanced strategies in general, The Social Strategist is the perfect next step.

While Captivate and Cues provide a strong foundation in social skills, they may not fully address the specific challenges men face in competitive professional and social environments.

The Social Strategist fills this gap introducing sophisticated techniques for networking, influence, and leadership.

The Social Strategist also touches on foundational mindsets that help you build a high-quality man character that effortlessly attracts other, without having to force any ‘cool line’ on them.

It complements Vanessa’s work by taking her foundational lessons and adding some more advanced material to keep you going along the way of social mastery.