Are you looking for the traits that allow you to spot (and potentially avoid) low quality men?
You have come to the right page.
By the end of it, you will know exactly what traits make a low quality man.
Traits of Low Quality Men
This article leverages psychology to uncover what are the most telling signs of low quality men.
1. Emotionally Un-Intelligent
Daniel Goleman says that emotional intelligence accounts for 80% of success in life.
I don’t believe much in quantifying something that already per se is (extremely) hard to measure.
But emotional intelligence still accounts for a major portion of one’s life success and fulfillment.
Emotional intelligence includes:
- Self awareness (knowledge of himself)
- Self management (managing one’s own emotions)
- Social awareness (understanding other people’s emotions)
- Relationship management (developing positive relationships)
Emotional is what allows us to control our emotions, keep doing what we don’t want to necessarily do, and to keep positive relationships.
Men with a low emotional intelligence tend to show an erratic behavior, jump from one thing to another and to have very little interpersonal skills.
Low Self Awareness
Men with low self awareness don’t know what they like, what their passions are and what they want out of life.
They don’t follow their own path, and they always look at others for direction. They rarely work on own projects and instead seek work from someone else (and they’d take any sort of random, generic employment).
Low Self Management
Low self management means they seek short term pleasure over long term results.
They buy whatever they like, possibly using credit. And they buy liabilities and depreciating assets that keep them poor.
From a skillset perspective, they watch and comment on other people doing things with their lives instead of working on tier own (ie.: watch football, gossip and spend inordinate amount of time with TV series).
Low Social Skills
A lack of social awareness and relationship management leads to poor people skills and poor relationships.
2. He Has no Purpose
Somebody once said that when you don’t have a goal, you end up working for those who do have a goal.
That much is true.
And while working for someone else is NOT an indicator of low quality, taking whatever comes your way with no preference and no ambition to move forward is
And when you lack even a general drive to move forward, that’s a major sign of low quality men.
Men with no purposes and no goals, when they have low sex drive as well, are basically human plants.
Except they don’t produce oxygen
This video of neutered Brian is an example:
Or Has a Poor Purpose
Some men do have some purposes, but the very nature of those purposes make them low quality.
Some examples of poor quality purposes:
- Sleep with as many women as possible
- Destroy something or somebody
- Vicarious purposes (ie.: win something via his team)
Some not so great purposes also include:
- Make as much money as possible (often motivated by inner insecurities)
3. Big Ego (With No Matching Skills)
However a big ego with matching skills is what people might call arrogant.
Arrogant is certainly not a positive trait, and yet it can be perversely charismatic and even attractive to women.
However, the real tragedy is when a big ego is not matched by skills, competence and results.
Men with a big ego usually have two issues:
- Fixed mindset (read Mindset)
- Fragile ego
Since these men don’t think they can improve and they build their self esteem around “being right” or “being good”, they always need to win and prove themselves in order to defend their self-image.
It’s hard having a relationship with these guys.
When they are proud, they will need to win to prove themselves. They are touchy and easily offended when you raise a fair concern. They can’t accept a feedback and are more likely to be abusive.
Here is a good caricature of a proud man with a big (and fragile) ego:
Of course, a huge ego doesn’t always mean argumentative and narcissist.
Sometimes, if he is very submissive, you might first need to get to know him a bit better before you can see his true colors.
4. He Doesn’t Care Much… About Anything
A low quality man doesn’t care about much.
But it’s not the good side of not caring.
He doesn’t care:
- What he does
- How much he makes
- Where he lives
- Who he is with
And he doesn’t care much about himself.
He is cool with being a bit overweight, with having cheap and ill fitting clothes and with doing little with his life.
The man in The Good Girl is a great example of how a man who doesn’t care about anything looks and behaves
And the fact that his friend thinks that a woman who disrespects her husband, complains and is generally constantly on a bad mood is the “best woman around” is also another indicator of low quality.
5. He is a Pushover
Stereotypical, excessive nice guys are an example of low quality men.
If a low quality man is unhappy, he uses passive aggression rather than direct communication.
6. Anxious Attachment
When it comes to the four different attachment styles low quality men are either
In dating low quality men either don’t play any games because they wouldn’t even know how, or they play lots of mind games.
7. He Is Fake
Fakeness is often a byproduct of low self esteem.
Low quality men are fake because they don’t feel that being themselves is enough. Thus they wear different masks, trying to cover up what they perceive are major flaws that would repel people from them.
8. Has an External Locus of Control
The locus of control is the degree to which people believe that they have -or don’t have- control over their life.
The locus of control determines whether you feel like the man at the helm of your life or like a castaway in a rudderless life boat.
These are the two types of locus of control:
- Internal locus of control
- External locus of control
Internal locus of control means you believe you are in control of your life.
External locus of control means you believe life events determine the course of your life and you don’t have control over them.
Brian Tracey says that people with an external locus of control feel helpless, are sadder, get angry more easily, and are more prone to depression.
On the other hand, people with an internal locus of control are confident, energetic and optimistic. They even tend to be healthier!
Low quality men have an external locus of control.
They have beaten dog faces, they believe they are unlucky… And even if they’re not unlucky, it’s not like they believe they can make their own luck.