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Dating (Men)

Home » Dating For Men: Start Here

Dating For Men: Start Here

This post provides an overview of dating strategies, techniques, and mindsets for men.

Contents

  • The Basics
  • Power & Seduction
  • Dating Strategies
  • Gender Conflict

The Basics

It’s just two articles to get a quick overview of dating power dynamics:

  • Sexual Dynamics 101: this article provides an overview of the power dynamics of the sexual market place
  • Sexual market value: here you will learn what men and women seek and value in a mate -based on 20% experience and 80% science-

Those two form the foundations to understand the theoretical and scientific side of dating.

Power & Seduction

Most women prefer men to be more powerful, more dominant, and higher status than they are.

These two articles provide you the foundations on how to be the type of leader women want:

  • Leadership and Seduction
  • Dominance and Seduction
  • Traits of high-quality men

Dating Strategies

PUAs and seduction blogs usually sell the “lover style of seduction”, faster and with less commitment and investment.

Mainstream dating advice (and women themselves) is more tailored towards the provider style, which entails more personal investment, commitment and, often but not always, a slower lead up to sex.

Both are correct, depending on the context.
But rarely either will admit that the other strategy might just work out better.

Mainstream culture cannot embrace the lover type because the lover type is inherently bad news for society itself, and that makes sense (it would be bad for society if no men ever invested).
And seduction websites cannot embrace the provider type or they’d be out of ebooks and courses to sell (yes, the same selfish reason).

In truth, albeit I have a personal bias for the lover strategy, what strategy works best depends on the man, the girl, each one’s life-phase, the environment in which you meet, and the overall culture.

Which one is best for you?

So start an overview first:

  • It’s more about quality than role: most of all, it’s not about being a lover, a boyfriend candidate, or even a friend. It’s about the quality. Focus on quality first and foremost.

Then move to this one:

  • Lover or provider: lover and provider are two different strategies, and one is not always superior to the other. This article shows you which one works best for you, and when.

Get a more balanced view on the different ways to meet women:

  • Cold approach VS social circle: the short of it is that you’re better off with an intelligent mix of all strategies. How much of each depends on your situation and your environment

And then upgrade to these:

  • Dating strategies: There are countless dating products, some of which are very good, too. This list does not replace all those good products but focuses on strategies that have been proven and confirmed as being effective for the majority of men
  • Types of seducers: just like any good products seeks a good market niche, so does your sexual result improve when you know what’s your sexual market positioning
  • Sexual market value hacks: there is so much more you can do to improve your dating life than simply learning game and approaching more. As a matter of fact, learning game might not even be the quickest and most effective thing you can do. Sexual market value hacks might provide you with the quickest bang for the buck.

There are also countless legit reviews of dating products on this website (quick warning: in at least one instance a popular online website for dating product reviews behaved as an affiliate scam).
You can start with this list of:

  • The best dating books and courses

Gender Conflict

In some male-only self-development circles, there is a large focus on sexual conflict.
Sometimes it’s good wisdom, but not always on point when it comes to science.

So here is an article on that:

  • The tools of sexual conflict: this one will pull you out of the matrix with actual science and evidence (and without biases). 

A bit more real-life power dynamics here:

  • Games women play: including manipulative games women play, and shit tests. Those are a small sample from “Dating Power Dynamics”, which goes more in-depth
  • Check the forum too, there are plenty of strategies and examples to help you learn power dynamics.
    • Here is a popular one with actual pictures.

This is it for an overview.
To reach a good level in your dating effectiveness, you don’t need tons of material. You need great material, and then working on it.

author avatar
Lucio Buffalmano

The author holds a master's degree from La Sapienza, department of communication and sociological research, and is a member of the American Psychology Association (APA).

He studies psychology, persuasion, social strategies, and anything related to people and power dynamics.

Lucio's approach combines science, critical analysis, and a continuous quest for first-hand experience. He loves all three aspects, and believes that to be effective at teaching social strategies, the three must go together.

You can learn everything Lucio has to teach with Power University

Previous post

Social Power Dynamics: Start Here
February 21, 2020

Next post

How Leadership Gets You Girls
February 23, 2020

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