How to Mind Fuck a Guy: 12 Techniques (With Examples)

woman in lingerei on top of a guy in bed

How to make him crazy about you?

Or, how it’s more hip to ask these days: how to mind fuck a guy?

I’m glad you asked.

This post delves deep into the psychological meanders of the male mind to give you all the tricks in the book to make men obsessed with you.

Warning: this post contains a lot of mind games and mind fuck techniques.

woman controls a man by his tie

Let’s start:

1. The Dionysiac Mind-Fuck

You know how men like watching the craziest dancer on the dance floor?

That’s the appeal of the dionysiac spirit.

There’s much external pressure on men to appear rational and in control more times than they’d want to.
And that’s why irrationality and a touch of madness can be so appealing to the unconscious.

And a woman who can muster irrational abandon and Dionysiac sexuality exerts an irresistible pull on him.


Look at this example from “Dating In The Dark”.
She uses a dionysiac spirit of irrationality to make him want to possess her.

Notice his reaction, when he says:

Mindfucked guy: In a weird way I’d still like to see Ilona

And then he ends with “damn”.
He’s been taken for a ride. And he just experienced the power of irrationality:

Her: Did you hear that? Whenever I’m in bed with someone I really really fancy my stomach always does that
Her: That must be someone in this room I really fancy. It could be you. Or it could be a spirit, a ghost
Her: We don’t come from apes, we actually came from dogs
Her: We’re not gonna get married, are we

Him: (commenting later on his date) my date with Ilona was like jumping straight into the twilight zone. The whole thing was one shock after the other. But in a weird way I’d like to see Ilona again because I’m just so confused. But… Damn!

In this example, she effectively makes him want to fuck her.
The downside in this specific case is that she also ends up looking like a low-quality girl.

But madness is not synonymous with stupid and you can do the same without looking stupid.

See the example from Aida Yespica in:

2. Madonna-Whore Seduction

Carnal desire and a powerful sexual chemistry validate men and enslave their minds.

But there is a danger: you might appear too “easy” if it’s too soon (see: Madonna-Whore Dichotomy).

What’s the solution, then?

As Peter Diamandis says, when you’re faced with a tough choice: take both.
You will resist him AND show an overpowering sexual lust: the best of both worlds.


This is a quick story of a woman (unconsciously) using the madonna-whore seduction on me:

She wasn’t having any.

So I decided to stop charging and let her do some touching.
I took her hand and started running it across my body.

My abs, then down on my upper leg and thigh. Then slowly back up again.

Finally, I slide her hand across my crotch and erected co*k.

And then back up again.
On the next pass, I let her linger a bit more on my crotch. Then lower down again.
Eventually, I let her slip under the underwear’s elastic band. But just a dip.

A few more motions and then I finally let her lace her fingers around my co*k.
And that’s when she jumped on me, panting heavy and her tongue swirling in my mouth.

She was showing me all the signs of pure sexual abandon.

I’m thinking this is it and we’re ready for the final move: I pushed her on her back, ready to rail her.

But she snaps back to rational, again resisting me.

Have you figured out which part is the madonna/whore seduction?

Of course her panting and horny is the whore, while resisting again in spite of her dripping sexuality is the Madonna part.

The succession of unbridled lust and rational resistance lasted for a while. I’m not a fan of women resisting for long, but of all the resistances I’ve encountered… That was the best lead-up to sex I have ever had.

I sometimes still think about it…

How To


Show powerful sexual attraction while you also fight off the urge.

  • Let him come to you
  • Abandon yourself in the heat of the moment
  • Suddenly “wake up”: it’s not easy but you’re forcing yourself to stop
  • Rinse and repeat

For more techniques on delaying sex also read: how to turn down sex.

And here is a short video example from the movie “Seduce and Abandoned”:

3. Push-Pull Seduction

Lust and emotional dependency thrive on mixed feelings.

Anger and lust, passion and fear, warmth and coldness. And, most of all, physical heat and emotional distance.

The key is to alternate them.
Give positive feelings, then take it away. Then have lustful sex. Then rinse and repeat.

A mix of strong and positive emotions alternating with negative ones rarely fails to make men lust and obsess over you.


My date was late and, slightly annoyed, I used that time to shop for groceries.

When I came out, there she stood: a perfect candid baby face with a striped suit (mixed signal).

She didn’t apologize and was cold and distant when I hugged her. That annoyed me once again.
I asked her to help me carry the grocery.

And she refused.

My patience was running out.
I was teetering between telling her to get the fuc* off back home and take her back, rail her, and then dish the same shit*y treatment back.
Of course I decided for the latter.

We walked without exchanging a single word for a couple of minutes, and then she went from cold to teasing.
She made fun of sulking me.
She told me I should call her “miss no” and teased me if other women do the same (she sets herself up as “different” and “superior”).

Then she finally swung the opposite direction.
She apologized, took more than half the grocery and lightly hit me with her leg as if to say “wise up, I was just fu*king with you”.

I was already horny, but with that turnaround, damn!
I wonder how did I resist bending her over and possessing her in the street.

How To

Make him feel like the best man in the world, make him feel like he can make you so happy and satisfied.

Then take it all away and keep him guessing.

  • Love him, then
  • Make him angry
  • Be cold and distant, then
  • Have wild sex
  • Be cuddly (let them think for a while they have you)
  • Rinse and repeat

4. Mixed Signals Seduction

Similar as above.

Push and pull is a typical form of mixed signal and the most famous example, but there’s more you can use:

  • Angelic face (paternalistic instincts) + naughty undertones
  • White dress & blonde hair (purity)+ revealing clothes
  • Baby face (naivety) + suit (seriousness)
  • Striped suit, back from office (power) + submissively asking him to rail you
madonna whore seduction

The Madonna-whore sexual seduction also leverages push-pull and mixed signals

5. Regression Seduction

Nobody really ever leaves his mother

Here’s a sum of Western women’s dating strategy:

  1. Show no emotions
  2. Pretend you’re not into him
  3. Make him chase and invest

While that definitely can work (albeit often with the wrong guys!), the opposite strategy can work even better.

And the opposite is what Robert Greene dubs “regression seduction” in his seminal The Art of Seduction.
Greene says that the most powerful Regression, the Infantile Regression, is all about unconditional love.


An ex-girlfriend of mine was a natural when it came to oedipal regression strategy.
This was what my ex did:

Healing Kisses

  • I woke up one morning with little sleep and dark circles around my eyes. She leaned in and kissed the area under my eyes

That was unexpected.
I fumbled a “thanks” and a smile.
I couldn’t even remember my mother having done that, and I was smitten by her display of caring.

Sleeping Temple Kisses

  • During sleep I realized that before going to the bathroom she kissed me on the temple

Tucking In

  • When I’d join her in bed, she would raise the cover to help me in
  • On a night flight, I fell asleep and woke up with the sleeping cover snugly arranged on me (she did that for me)

These are caring signals the way a mom would do to a baby.

How did that affect me?

It’s easy to tell sex stories, but it’s less easy to be open with emotional ones. But the truth is that I still feel emotionally connected to my ex. I think of her as “my baby”, but probably the opposite would be more correct.
And if I have to think of an ex-girlfriend I’d ever want to be together forever, it would be her.


Listen to what she says:

Charlie: Always trying to get back to that primary state of completeness, connectednesss, they took total care of me, and I felt peace in their presence.

And again:

Charlie: why this relationship sticks so much with me. What about this girl? I don’t care. This other girl? I don’t care. But this one? Oh, call her right now

That’s total emotional control.

And again:

Charlie: this person must provide for your most basic needs to feel save, loved, and enough. (…)
With this woman was the only time I let myself watch movies, I let myself eat junk food, it was the only time I let my brain take time off work

How To

You can use this one when you want a strong long-lasting relationship.

For the specific moves, you can copy the above examples and add some of these:

  • Caress him
  • Remove lints, fix his clothes
  • Show unconditional love when he makes a mistake
  • Show total acceptance
    • Say you like his belly
    • Say you like him when he’s dorky
    • Say you like him when he’s drowsy in the morning

Best With

It works with everyone.

And it’s especially useful if you want to hook great, wealthy but rascal playboys, or very driven men who can never let go.
They will use and forget all other women, but they’ll always come back to you.

6. Inverse Regression Seduction

This is the inverse regression.

Here you regress to childlike behavior.

In the presence of youth, men feel like their own youth is coming back.

They get to feel like fathers and take care of you, but with the addendum of the sexual side.

Mixing sex and innocence is exactly what made Marilyn Monroe so appealing.


As you can imagine the movie Lolita has tons of great examples.

Only issue is, she is a kid.

This is an example with a mature woman instead.
Notice the man is also partially regressing, but he’s the aggressor:

Him: (jokingly chases her with a knife)
Her: (shrieks like a baby, runs away)

He is the father figure, while she gets to play the baby

How To:

  • Play naive, lost… In need of protection and guidance
  • Laugh out loud and with gusto: you haven’t experienced the darker side of life yet
  • Feel free to be awkward: you haven’t yet internalized society’s rules of “proper” behavior
  • Emphasize weaknesses and vulnerabilities

The rules bend with inverse regression.
Don’t worry about entitlement mentality or asking too much: children are egocentric and believe the world revolves around them.
And he will act accordingly and do everything for you (OK, now I link to Lolita).

Best For:

This is perfect to get sugar daddies to pamper and spoil you.


Almost every guy will enjoy a bit of childlike spirit, but don’t overdo it.

Men with no pedophile tendencies can be put off (I had to tell a girl playing baby with her Tweety underwear not to wear them anymore).

And remember, it’s lightheartedness with sex undertones, not full-on baby. The first part here is good, the last one is too much.

7. Guilt-Trip

How to make him crazy about you isn’t necessarily directly related to attraction, sex and seduction.

If you can instill a major sense of guilt in his conscience, that will also push him to you.

Out of guilt, yes, but that doesn’t necessarily need to replace love or sexual attraction, but can be on top of them.


There are many sexual moments I’d like to relive in my life.

Some of them, because they were great.
Some others, because I didn’t have her and thought I should have had her.

But if I could go back in time one time, and one time only, that would be to change things with the woman who told me:

Ex-fling: I wish I had never done it with you.

Something changed the day she uttered those words.

I could no longer look at myself and say I’m a giver.
In a way, those words stole my innocence and burned a little hole in my conscience.
And even to this day, after she forgave me, I still feel I need to make it up to her.

How To:

  • Let him feel he pushed too hard for sex
  • Tell him you feel so hurt
  • Let him know you’re devastated after he cheated

The Cheating Guilt Trip
Harvey in Act Like a Lady Think Like a Man says that men who cheated often go back to being perfect husbands.
That’s true, but it only happens when she denies him first, lets him see what he’s missing… And makes him feel guilty about it.


It will not work with narcissists and sociopaths.
Some of them will even see it as a badge of their deceptive skills.

8. Dangerous Woman Seduction

Danger mixes well with madness and irrationality, and takes it a step further.

Danger is exciting, that’s one of the reasons why heart-breaking players appeal to women and why James Bond is so alluring.

And, if present, it also plays into possible latent masochistic tendencies.


We were pillow talking and she was prodding about me and my life -funny how some women remember to do that after, BTW-.

I love after-sex conversations. You can drop the masks and really be yourself.
But back then “myself” was a bit of a childish tw*t.

So when it came to talking about love and past relationships, I delivered my line -which I thought was so cool-:

Me:just don’t fall in love with me

With a serious and stern tone she said:

Her:No, I will fall in love with you and then I will kill you

I laughed at the beginning thinking how that was the best comeback I had ever heard.
But I also realized later I was perversely more attracted to her.

dangerous woman seduction

The “Dangerous Woman Seduction” is also one of the driving seduction forces of the movie “Basic Instinct”, where in the final sex scene he suspects and fears for his life.

9. Possessive Dominance Seduction

Let’s start with the due disclaimers: violence sucks.

That being said, aggression, violence and attraction can powerfully overlap.

Physical domination appeals to women more than most people would care to admit.
For many women, rape-like sex is a fantasy.

And, sometimes, more than a fantasy.
Relationship researcher John Gottman reveals in The Science of Trust that he was shocked to hear woman after woman confess that their best sex was right after a beating.

Well, most men aren’t going to be excited after a beating.
But they’re going to be excited when she puts a little fight, or when she teases him physically or sexually.


Having sex during a fight, or when it seems you two are on the verge of splitting, is extremely seductive.

And so is a mix of sex and aggression.

Do you think this scene is sexy or not:

Her: fuck you!
Him: that’ll make you happy (LOL, what a comeback :D)
Her: walks away
Him: (grabs her when she’s leaving)
Her: no, no, it’s over
Him: (starts kissing and undressing her, then penetrates her from behind)

Notice the mix of emotions: hate, carnal passion and love.
P.S.: unluckily my own upload with the full sex scene has been flagged (damn you prudes! :), so you get the PG-13 version here.

How To

To stay in the safe zone, you can do the following:

  • The first time put up some physical resistance (see above)
  • Resist from time to time and let him “earn you” with some dominance
  • Pillow fights
  • Play wrestling

10. Private Area Pokes

This is a big weapon in the arsenal of the teasing seductress.

The below the belt touches are a form of waving a red flag in front of him.
It’s like saying:

Teasing Seductress: I might be into you… Are you gonna be man enough to come get me, or are you sleeping down there?

And rest assured he will want to fuck you and obsess over you the whole night (or life) long.

A similar and equally effective technique is “accidentally” rubbing the pelvis or chest against him, which were rated as the most effective technique to turn him on by David Buss’ research.


See an example from this real-life documentary:

Her: (touches above his ass while walking away)

If you want to fuck him, this move will mindfuck him to want to fuck you 🙂

If you want to be more provocative and you’re in private, you can have grab/poke or touch his private parts (note: video’s been deleted).
Just remember: don’t be too direct or thirsty, this is not you who wants him: this is you making him want you.

How To

  • Touch his upper leg when seating
  • Rest your hand on his inner thigh for a split of a second
  • Touch the side of his leg while waking
  • Joking “hit him” below the belt (not necessarily crotch, side of the leg is also fine)

11. Sex-Talk Seduction

Actions speak louder than words.

But that doesn’t mean that words can’t have their place in making him crazy about you.

Indeed sexually-laden talk is a great, great way to arouse someone.
It’s also a game men use with women, and it works even better when women do it to men.

As we’ve seen in the text flirting guide, it’s best when implied, understated, and hinted.
Direct can also work, but be aware it’s at a higher danger of slotting you into the short-term type of gal.


The best way to do it is to pass obvious hints at sex, but without getting crude.

That way, you make him want to fuck you while still coming across as a high quality woman.

Him: all I need is a blanket, I don’t need all the sheets
Her: I don’t want you getting your funk all over
Him: my funk?
Her: yeah, I can’t wash a couch. G’night
Him: thank you
Her: I would let you sleep in my bed, but uhm… I wouldn’t want you to get confused

Check this forum entry for a couple more ideas on talking about sex without using curse words.

12. Sexual Bursts Seduction

Uncover your wild side… Then take it away.

Quick bursts of whirlwind sexual passion will leave him speechless.

Actually, better than speechless: it will leave him horny and excited.

And that’s when brain neurological patterns are more easily shaped: you’re literally branding him.
Obsession guaranteed.


Watch Summer’s perfect execution:

Her: (submissive and feminine tonality) hey
Him: hi
Her: (walks towards him, doesn’t say a word)
Him: so, it was.. fun… the other day…
Her: (starts making out with him with her body against his)

Please notice the body language and how she moves and looks at him.
Notice the slight panting of sexual arousal towards the end, how she looks at him deeply, but briefly, so that he looks at her far more and far longer (higher investment).

That’s perfect.

How To

Catch him where sex is not to be expected.

Then turn him on:

  • Stroke his package beside a clerk’s counter
  • A footsie under the table meeting the parents
  • Throw yourself at him in a fitting room


woman in lingerie on top of a man

See “Seduction University” for more practical tools and strategies

1 thought on “How to Mind Fuck a Guy: 12 Techniques (With Examples)”

  1. super to have found this place. seriously needful in my top-10 of needful things. maybe top-3 of needful things.

    long long story. i was amazed reading these things as i have felt i really blew it but have been actually employing these very things for the past week. not as a trick; as real and pure devoted love. i was not coached. it just happened. i pray it helps. i was ready and he was ready but for different agenda. we need to get on the same page.

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